Compassion Instead Of Anger

So I was speaking to someone recently about how angry they were with some stressful things and people in their life. 

I listened carefully and tried to empathize--also in full transparency, it got to be a lot and I at some point was begging them to stop!

At one point, I just said, instead of being angry maybe try to be compassionate. 

And I could see in other person's reaction that they thought perhaps that I had hit on something a little eye-opening here. 

We can get angry about all the stresses and injustices that we perceive in our lives. 

People blame us, attack us, don't appreciate us, talk down to us, disrespect us, even bully us or try to hurt us.

Also life throws some pretty stinging to earth-shattering circumstances upon us.

And maybe we have every right to feel angry.

But usually the anger, unless we need the adrenaline-rush in fighting for our survival and for our core beliefs and values, doesn't help us achieve what we really want. 

What we want most of the time is to resolve things!

But getting angry and lashing out often only makes things worse. 

We act rashly, we overreact, we say and do things we may regret afterwards, and the consequences of our reaction can be severe to us afterwards in terms of alienating and harming others, escalating the situation and making it worse, creating hurt and destruction in our own wake, and even losing jobs or getting yourself in trouble and sent to the pokey.

If instead of getting angry and flinging arrows, we look at things from eyes of compassion, we can listen to others more carefully, understand the situation better, and try to rectify bad relationships or cope with stressful life events by employing emotional intelligence and a soft hand/skills. 

This is not to say that we should excuse really bad behavior or truly unforgivable misdeeds, but rather that we should look at things in a larger context, the role we play, and as part of our our life challenges to make things better and overcome.

Anger and the associated response is appropriate when the little devil is doing their misdeeds (lashing out severely and/or repeatedly with harm and intent), but compassion can help to see everything else for what it is or isn't and gives us an opportunity to react with a level head, a stable hand, and humanity as a first resort. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Compassion Instead Of Anger

Need Some Money

Big banner advertising Money!

A Monopoly sweepstakes by McDonald's to draw customers. 

Sort of ironic a low-cost fast food provider "giving" money away.

But who doesn't need money? 

I remember the song as a child, "Money makes the world go round..."

Always distasteful at the focus in the world on money, instead of on being good decent people with a bigger picture on issues, suffering, and tikkun olam. 

Really, it's the tug of war between people's personal selfishness and the ability to exhibit selfless giving to others. 

Does a person need a certain amount of financial stability and security to be a better giver?

I guess that makes sense--if you have more and don't feel financially burdened and threatened at every turn in life, you can be more charitable with your own giving--not feeling pinched and vulnerable. 

Still, I think it's important to remember that money can certainly be at "the root of all evil" when it becomes the end rather than the means to a life of purpose, understanding, and compassion that goes way beyond our own little desires and selves. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Need Some Money

Guillotine, Other Options Plz

I took this photo of a bumper sticker on a pickup truck in Washington, D.C.

"Stop Bitching. Start A Revolution."

So I'm thinking this is not the type of message you like to see in the capital of the country. 

But looking beyond the call by whomever for a forcible overthrow of the government (yeah, hopefully they don't mean it)...

Perhaps what they do mean for people to do something more than just complain about the things they see that are wrong or broken, and instead to do something positive. 

Not a real revolution, but an evolution of change--incremental change, even baby steps, but leading to positive and constructive betterment! 

Stop just huffing and puffing about this and that.

Consider speaking up, coming up with new and better ideas, advocating for something more, and actually helping to build it. 

The guillotine is normally not the solution (French Revolution aside)--but that doesn't mean you can't do squat. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Guillotine, Other Options Plz

Good Can (And Will) Overcome Evil

Beautiful video showing that good can overcome evil. 

Next video is where the woman (empowered) takes down the would be attackers herself--with a big time, well-deserved smackdown!

Where on the right track. ;-)

Good Can (And Will) Overcome Evil

It's Not Working

So it's human nature to want to leave the world a better place than before we got here.

But you wouldn't know it by how things are looking the last number of years.

Here's just the latest from reports this week:

1) The Global Peace Index: "World is less peaceful today than in 2008...Last year alone it is estimated that 20,000 people were killed in terrorist attacks up from an average of 2,000 a year only 10 years ago."

2) A Record Year In Misery: "The world has never seen a refuge crisis this bad...last year saw the total number of forcibly displaced persons rise to 59.5 million, an all time high." This is due to world conflict, general violence, human rights violations, and persecution."

3) Climate Apocalypse: "A child born today may live to see humanity's end...[as a result of] overcrowding, denuded resources, and climate change...dangerous climate change is already here. The question is can we avoid catastrophic climate change."

4) Americans Have Lost Confidence In Everything: "It not just Congress [and the President] and the economy that have Americans concerned these days...All in all, it's a picture of a nation discouraged about its present and worried about its future, and highly doubtful that its institutions can pull America out of its trough.

Maybe the worst thing is that many people are deluding themselves that everything is hunky dory. 

But isn't it time for some real wins again? 

To do that we need genuine good old fashioned elbow grease--that means we start with a strategy that actually tackles the issues rather than kicking the can down the road. We need honesty, not political upmanships and swell soundbite cliches. 

What good is appeasement to the masses now, if it means their utter despair or demise later--for example, why should we be Greece on the brink of national bankruptcy, if instead we can be Norway with the largest sovereign wealth fund in the world? 

Then comes the hard work, fortitude, and commitment to turn the tide on the bad news and losses. This mean personal and national sacrifice now in order to have better times for our children and grandchildren. 

G-d is watching us, our children are questioning us, the needy are looking to us. 

We are working hard, but it's hardly working! 

Maybe we need to make this real simple: "Little Johnny, now take your medicine, and stop fighting Mommy, p-lease!"  ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

It's Not Working

In Every World, The Haves And Have Nots

So no matter the time nor the society and their particular philosophical, economical, and social creed, there are ALWAYS the haves and the have nots. 

You have your upper caste and lower caste, your rich and poor, your religious elites and laypersons, your Harvard-educated and community college grads, your executive suite and your day laborers, you masters and your slaves, your ruling elite and your plebeians, your hunter and hunted, your VIPs and your Joe Shmoes.

In India, you still have an extensive caste system even today.  In Russia, you have the KGB, the Politburo, and the Oligarchs. In China, you have the Communist Party, the Military elite, and the venture capitalists/billionaires. In Europe, you still have The Queen and vestiges of the old guard monarchies, although gone are the Feudal lords and serfs, instead replaced by the Church and successful business and political elite. In America, ah...money and political power make the country go round. 

Last evening, I watched the movie, Elysium, taking place in a dsytopian future where the Earth has become overpopulated, polluted, and sick, but the elite are riding high on a large circling space habitat called Elysium, where everyone lives in a mansion with pool and lush grounds, eats exquisitely, and has the finest healthcare in machines that can cure everything from lymphoma to do full facial reconstruction in a matter of seconds. 

Whether in the future or the past, the only difference between the haves and have nots is how much the haves have, and how little have nots have not.

Is this societal makeup preordained or is their a way that we can raise the standard of living for everyone AND make it more equitable (unless you consider it necessary for Bill Gates to have $80,000,0000,000 and the homeless person on the street not a dime in his pocket)?

Over and over again, I read how the disparity between rich and poor, powerful and powerless, becomes ever more pronounced:  
- Now for example, CEOs generally earn 331 times (yeah last year it was 354) the amount average workers do and 774 times as much as minimum wage earners!
- Studies that show that Presidential and executive powers continue to expand with eleven reasons why.
- And the richest 1% will soon own more than the rest of the world.

In Elysium, after a lot of sci-fi thriller action and fighting, the protagonist manages to make EVERYONE a citizen of Elysium, so they can all partake of the largess, and at the end the med ships arrive to cure all the sick. 

That's the movies, but in real life, maybe we will see this only when the Messiah comes or there is a complete shift in the way we think and treat each other. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

In Every World, The Haves And Have Nots

Light Up The Night

This was a beautiful piece in the New York Times today.

It was about how two sons handled the final hours with their father after he was removed from off life support.

With the prodding of one son, the father reluctantly agrees to see a Rabbi before his death, and this Rabbi describes to the dying man the meaning of his (and our) life:

"Imagine your whole life now, and for each [and every] time you did something good, imagine it as a little glow you left behind that lights a dark road stretching back in time. It's a long, long row of lights now, isn't it?"

Remembering over time, the father nods, smiles and is obviously comforted in this final hour as he sees in his mind's eye all the shinning lights for the acts of kindness that he was leaving behind. 

Isn't this what life is all about?

Every choice we make, everything we do, can have an amazing impact and leave light when before there was just darkness. 

Imitating G-d in creation, we create light separating it from the darkness out there, good from evil...we create the future. 

Our goal...light up the night. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Light Up The Night

@Manna Food Center

Today we volunteered at Manna Food Center.

"Fighting hunger and feeding hope in Montgomery County."

There were huge bins of food that had been donated and collected from various organizations and charitable people.

A group of us from the synagogue, Magen David, met at the center.

We checked the dates on each item to ensure the food was not expired and still good to eat. 

We sorted the food by type into different boxes, crates, and shelves. 

There was areas for cans, pastas, cereals, pantry items, and more. 

The area that had the most stuff when we were done sorting...you guessed it--the junk food like cookies and chocolate--sort of unfortunate, but probably a comment on our times for what people actually buy and eat (despite all the calls for healthier eating and living).

There was one area specifically where we placed food for kids who don't have enough food for the weekends (when they don't have the school lunch program etc.), and they come on Fridays and fill their backpacks with milk boxes, crackers, and other things they can easily take home with them.

This really made me think about the dire straits that some families are in and especially the impact on the children.

G-d, no one should go hungry, and it was nice to see that people donate and volunteer to help, but still why in such a rich country like ours is there still so much hunger and need? ;-)

(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)

@Manna Food Center

Might Does Not Make Right

I heard from someone the other day...

"Do what is right--the others be damned!"

And this is right on the money.

You should always follow the dictates of your conscience.

Do not worry about pressure from others or what others will do that you cannot control. 

My dad (A"H) used to say:

"YOU do what is right--YOU be the example!"

He was my example, and I will always follow in his footsteps. ;-)

(Source photo: here with attribution to cursedthing)

Might Does Not Make Right

Growing Shoes For Growing Feet

Great innovation from The Shoe That Grows.

Innocent children around the world living in poverty are frequently forced to walk barefoot, without shoes, risking dangerous injury from hard and sharp objects as well as disease from contaminated soil. 

Now there are expandable shoes that can be adjusted in the front toe piece and side with snaps, as well as with a back heel strap.

The shoes are made to expand five sizes and last 5 years with high quality rubber soles and leather uppers.

A donation of one pair for a needy child is just $10.

No child--or adult--should ever have to go without the basics like shoes and this can help millions get to a higher standard of living, which everyone deserves. ;-)

(Thank you to Michelle Blumenthal for sharing this with me.)

Growing Shoes For Growing Feet

Live To Live or Live To Die?

In The New York Times today, David Brooks presents “two sets of virtues, the resume virtue and the eulogy virtue.”

The resume virtues are the skills you need to get ahead in the marketplace, and the eulogy virtues are “whether you were kind, brave, honest, or faithful.”

While we'd like to believe that most feel that being a decent human being is more important than how much money we earn, unfortunately our education and economic systems are geared far more toward the latter, where it's widely acknowledged that "money makes the world go round!”

In fact, many will often sacrifice the moral high ground for landing on a bigger, cushier hill of worldly possessions and pleasures. 

Interestingly enough, my daughter asked me last week, whether it is better to personally live a happy life but die with a horrible reputation or to live selflessly, struggling with life challenges, but be revered after you die?

To me the answer was simple--live, learn, and grow regardless of momentary personal happiness. Do what’s right, period--honor and chivalry is alive and well. 

But my daughter told me that over 90% of people polled chose their happiness in life as their #1 goal.

I suppose it's easy to say what's the point of leaving a legacy if you were not happy living your life every day, but I would counter with what's the point in chasing life's daily pleasures, if you were a bum and everyone knows it?

The point isn't even what people say about us when we are alive or dead, but rather that we know that we tried our best to live as decent, ethical human beings and that hopefully, we left the world a better place than when we got here.

Sure, there is no blessing in being poor or unhappy--but living purely to satisfy one's voracious materialistic appetite is just being a selfish little pig--come on admit it!

On your deathbed, will you wish you that in your life you had more money and status or that you had been a better, more giving human being? 

I say forget the resume and the eulogy, just think about what will really gives you peace of mind and inner happiness and it's more than any amount of money can buy or any seduction you can imagine.  ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Live To Live or Live To Die?

Who Will Help?

This is an awesome video that has gone viral.

A social experiment with hidden camera filming of a homeless child freezing on the streets of Manhattan...

See the people just walking on by--completely ignoring or plain unaffected by the suffering taking place literally right next to them. 

Where is the compassion of the people?

Many are just rushing by, chatting away, and/or carrying fancy filled bags from nearby shopping excursions.

The bystanders walk past and practically over this boy's shivering body lying in ragged shirt, without a coat, and lying half inside a big black garbage bag on the street. 

I imagined G-d looking down on this extreme callousness of his creations ignoring the suffering of this boy and being quite upset. 

Perhaps, there are unfortunately so many people now homeless , hungry, and begging in the streets that our minds and hearts have simply learned to "tune it out."

The ending is really amazing...when the one person who comes over to care for the poor boy is a black homeless man--who ends up taking off his own coat and gives it to the child. 

May G-d open our eyes to the pain of our brethren and grant us compassionate hearts to sincerely care one for each other. ;-)

Who Will Help?

Live With The Eternal In Mind

I really like this saying.

I heard it this weekend on a popular television show at the burial of one of the characters. 

"What you see is temporal; what you don't see is eternal."

Everyday, we think we are living in the "real world," but this is just our mortal experience, one constrained by our senses and the dictates of time and space.

However, beyond this mere earthly experience and existence is the eternal G-d. 

Perhaps, we can take comfort and live a life of meaning, if our existence in the temporal world is always with the eternal in mind. ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution to Terry Dennis)

Live With The Eternal In Mind

Top 100 Social CIOs

Top 100 Social CIOs from Huffington Post.

So cool to make the list. ;-)

Shabbat Shalom!

Top 100 Social CIOs

Amazing Advances In Prosthetics

Watch this video...

Where a man who lost both arms over 40 years ago is fitted with these amazing dual prosthetics that he is able to control with his mind and muscle movements. 

Made with financing from the Defense Advanced Research Project Agency (DARPA).

John Hopkins University Applied Physics Lab shows the possibilities for the future for helping everyone from Wounded Warriors to those disabled from accidents and disease. 

G-d creates and we imitate and together we make an incredible flourishing world. ;-)

(Note: My gratitude to Rebecca Blumenthal for sharing this video with me.)

Amazing Advances In Prosthetics

Shoes On the Dumpster

So I had a great new pair of sandals that I wore just 3-4 times, but they didn't fit right on me.

We wanted to give them to a poor person, but didn't want to just walk up to someone on the street and say, "Hey, do you need a pair of shoes?"

So down in Fort Lauderdale here there are plenty of needy people, and we decided to leave them prominently on a trash/recycle bin on the street where we were confident that someone in need would see them and take them.

We left the shoes at about 5:45 pm and went to the store for some errands, and literally by the time we circled back not half an hour later, the shoes were gone.

It is terrible to see people on the street in need of food, clean clothes, and just a pair of shoes. 

While it was rewarding to see that someone got these shoes, the fact that they were gone so quickly shows me clearly that there is still so much more that needs to be done.

Too much poverty, too much suffering...my daughter says "Dad, we can change things!"

I hope someway we can all make a difference and help all the people that are in need--those are some mighty big shoes we need to fill, but I pray in my heart that G-d will help us all succeed. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Shoes On the Dumpster

Colors Of Race

With the race riots in Ferguson again this week, the divide between black and white is once again evident in America.

Coming from big city life in America, like New York City and Washington D.C., I've grown up in divided neighborhoods and united organizations.

For example, just this morning, my daughter and I walking down Las Olas had to duck into an Illy's coffee shop when an impoverished (black) man in dirty clothes and talking loudly to himself turned around on the street and was coming up steadily behind us in a threatening way. Similarly, the day before, there was a (white) lady at the bus stop talking out loud, hallucinating, and thrashing...also scary in this otherwise posh neighborhood.  In other words, these issues are race-agnostic!

Simultaneously, I go to synagogue where blacks and whites (as well as "black hatters" and the modern religious) sit and pray and socialize together, and go to work where many of my esteemed coworkers are African-Americans, and watch as one of my daughter's best friend in school and who she blabs with on the phone is a nice young man who happens to be black

Also, I remember last year I think it was having to move a heavy piece of furniture and one of my black neighbors went out of his way to help me get it upstairs--he was incredibly generous and he and many others where I live are friendly, neighborly, and we live side-by-side together.

We need to move from racial inequality to racial harmony!

We don't have to wait for an alien invasion to realize we are all human beings here on Earth and that we share more than not.

In Fort Lauderdale, by Florida Atlantic University, Nova Southeastern University, and Broward College, the actual intersections of the street are pained in multi-color. 

I love it..not black and white, but the colors of the rainbow...mixed, flowing, getting along, and happy.

Let it be--black and white, yellow, brown, and red--a melting pot, together throughout the world in peace and prosperity. 

No more rioting in Ferguson or elsewhere, but celebration of humanity--nothing more, nothing less. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Colors Of Race

Soften The Hearts

This last year has shown some difficult negotiations between the P5+1 and Iran.

It seems as if the P5+1 have been doing everything possible to get Iran to stop pursuing dangerous WMD, but that the response is just forever, "No."

So the deadline for a deal was extended once again. 

Many are saying no deal is better than a bad deal--and that certainly makes sense. 

The key is for national and global security to take precedence over any deal for deal's sake.

Everyone desperately wants peace, but it should be a real and lasting and verifiable peace.

Most people are good and want peace, but there are always those extremists who have an irrational hatred and seek nothing but power and destruction, and they says things like they want to "annihilate Israel" or seek to build ICBMs that can reach Europe and America. 

Oh L-rd, please soften the hearts in Iran to agree to a real and lasting peace that safeguards us, and that brings prosperity and betterment to the world. 

Maybe this next extension will be the charm--let's hope and pray.

Note: The characters in the cartoon are fictional and do not intend any disrespect to anyone--simply the hope for a softening of hearts and minds of Iran's leaders, and with that the attainment of a real and verifiable peace with this next round of negotiations. 

All opinions my own.

Soften The Hearts

Homeless At Foggy Bottom

The homeless situation in Washington D.C. (as in other big cities in the U.S.) is horrible and tragic. 

The homeless person here is wrapped in a blanket trying to stay warm on her wheelchair. 

Further, her bucket, at her feet, for people to give is empty. 

The Thanksgiving holiday is this week, but where is the thanks and where is the giving?

Interesting...halfway down the block is GW Hospital and across the street behind this lady is a gorgeous, modern, brand new GW University engineering and science building (almost completed now). 

The haves, the have mores, and the have nots. 

Where are all the trillions of dollars of spending going..,that we can't feed, clothe, shelter, and educate our people. 

We need to do better as a society for providing care for the truly needy.

G-d is watching what we do and what we don't do.

Our test. and the test of our elected officials/leadership--will we/they stand up for those that can't? 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Homeless At Foggy Bottom

Guard Your Menorah

This was a funny picture I took of a zebra with the stripes that are in the shape of a Jewish menorah. 

The menorah has a center stem from which to light the branches extending upward to the left and right on the menorah. 

Last night at a Shabbat dinner, someone said something very interesting about keeping G-d commandments and staying innocent and holy.

He said a person face, which has 4 of our senses (mouth, eyes, nose, and ears) is actually like a menorah.

These start at the center of the face and then are emanating upwards and outwards:

- First, the mouth (speech)  is sort of the center stem--and our words needs to be carefully spoken so that we speak nicely to others and not to hurt them with what we say. 

- Second, our nose with 2 nostrils (smell)--we should smell holy things like the sacrifices and incenses to G-d, and not things that make us improperly attracted to worldly impurities, like inappropriate sexual partners, drug, smoking, and alcohol. 

- Third, our 2 eyes (sight)--we need to see the good in others and the world around us, but guard ourselves so that we do not see things that make us want, desire, and lead us astray after falsity. 

- Fourth, our 2 ears (hearing) --we work to avoid hearing "evil speech" about others and instead seek to perceive words of insight, spiritually and growth. 

I would add the following to complete our 5 senses:

- Fifth, our 2 hands (touch)---because if we but lift our hands up to heaven in prayer and servitude to G-d, then we use our sense of touch for helping rather than hurting people. 

So while this zebra has a menorah on his side, we have it built into our very faces and bodies. 

And with a little effort, we can use all our senses for doing good, and guard ourselves from the otherwise seemingly natural impulses to do otherwise.  ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Guard Your Menorah