Showing posts with label Pleasure. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pleasure. Show all posts

June 10, 2018

Living Life Vicariously

So the Capitals won the Stanley Cup.  Go DC!

This little figurine made a debut on the counter of the concierge late last week for us to cheer them on!

You can ring the bell for help and while your waiting, get excited about the game. 

While these types of sports are not my thing per se, I do like watching a good Rocky movie or action flick where the good guys beat the sh*t out of the bad guys.

Whether you'watching your favorite sports team, your Hollywood dream stars, or even an occasional do (something) good politician, we are living vicariously through them. 

It's not our success we are seeing, but somehow we temporarily suspend our own selves and live through others (their eyes, their actions) and we partake just for a second of what it's like to be them winning or doing something really significant in life. 

We all can't be superstars in the center ring duking it out (all the time) and so we take a step back to see others that we relate to face up to the challenge, fight and hopefully win big. 

We don't walk away with the trophy, prize money, or fame, but we congratulate ourselves somehow for being on the winning team. 

Heck, I didn't do anything but have faith, go along for the ride, and then take pleasure in seeing my guy(s) win. 

Yet, from the humdrumness of perhaps some of our own everyday lives, we fantasize and garner the courage and strength to do our own great things. 

We can't be the strongest, smartest, most good-looking, personable, and talented in the world, but we can see parts of ourselves in others and we can try to model the best of them in ourselves and leverage what we got going on!

I don't really like spending a lot of precious time living like this through others--I don't mind getting inspiration when I see something amazing, but really I just want to try my hardest to be the best that I can be. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal) 
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March 15, 2018

The Makings Of Cold Stone



Gotta hand it to Cold Stone Ice Cream. 

They know how it make it cold, sweet, and rich tasting. 

Here they are making the signature Cookie Doughn't You Want Some. 

French Vanilla Ice Cream

Chocolate Chips

Cookie Dough

Fudge

Caramel

OMG, it is super premium!

And they make it right there in front of you. 

As you mouth waters for it, you almost want to just stick you finger in and snatch a bite.

Oh, the simple, sweet pleasures of life. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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September 19, 2016

Globs of Fat

So I went to get my flu shot today in the office. 

Yes, it's that time of year to start getting ready for Winter and all the germs that come with it. 

Anyway, while I was at the health center, they had this model of what body fat looks like. 

It was sort of just laying right on the table in the waiting room--yeah a big ick! 

It said:
"Globs of FatThis glob represents the look and feel of 5 pounds of body fat."

And this thing was enormous, bigger than someones hand, maybe even two hands. 

There was some text about another 1 pound piece of body fat, but I didn't see that lying around anywhere (and frankly the 5 pound glob was enough to get the point without comparison). 

This fat demonstration would make practically anyone want to chuck the carbohydrates and forever.

Pizza, pasta, bread, rice, potatoes, cereal, crackers, cookies, cakes--be gone!

Having recently done this myself, I can really appreciate how important this is and also how hard it can be. 

The food industry has us addicted to this crap and really it should be illegal. 

The high carb diet in America is truly of epidemic proportions and is potentially catastrophic to our health and longevity.

The only thing that glob of fat is good for is tossing it out the window and into the garbage dump. 

A high carb diet that makes people fat is death and we want to live! ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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January 4, 2016

A Person's Beauty

I took this photo yesterday of a mannequin that shows off her hair. 

It's amazing what hair does for a person.

I remember learning in Yeshiva that hair is considered the crown on a person's head. 

People go through all sorts of time and expense to keep their hair, grow it out, clean it, and style it.

Often not having hair means that person is sick and on heavy doses of medication or chemotherapy that makes their hair fall out. 

People put on wigs or other heads coverings for religious piety, modesty, and to consecrate themselves to G-d and/or their beloved--so that only they should see it--as something special between them. 

Sometimes, a person's hair is cut off to dehumanize them like the Nazi's did to the Jews and as happens to other prisoners. 

Also, when people go to the military, they are given a crew cut to take away their hair and individuality while they learn to conform and be obedient to their chain of command. 

Often in fights, people grab and pull a person by their hair to control and hurt them. 

But mostly, hair is soft, sensual and looks good on a person (except when it doesn't)--generally it evokes youth, vibrance, freedom, and sexuality. 

Of course beauty is only skin deep, but the hair is truly the majestic crown that G-d gave us. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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August 14, 2015

Mankind's Endless And Elusive Pursuit Of Happiness

So I took this photo yesterday of a lady on the Metro reading The Happiness Project.

The book is a multi-year bestseller about the pursuit of happiness and how the author, Grethen Rubin, took a year and made a project of getting happy.

She did this through a "methodical" project with "measurable goals" and working to "build on them cumulatively."

Now happiness is being described not as a goal or project, but as a "movement."

Why is happiness such an elusive pursuit to so many throughout the times?

In fact, in looking for how to achieve happiness throughout the ages, we can't even agree on what it is or how to do it.

Carl Cederstrom in the New York Times provides an overview where the how-to for achieving happiness has changed more times than some people change their underwear.

Here's to the rainbow of finding happiness:

- The Greeks/Aristotle - Be a good person, live ethically, cultivate one's virtues. 

- Hedonists/Epicureans - Pursuit whatever brings you pleasure

- Stoics - Happiness is achievable even when experiencing hardship, suffering, and pain

- Christianity - Happiness is not achieved on Earth, but rather in the afterlife/in divine union.

- Renaissance/Enlightenment/Thomas Jefferson - Happiness is an unalienable right, and related to property rights.

- Today - Achieve authenticity and be narcissistic, express true inner selves, get in touch with inner feeling, worship our bodies, and productivity through work

I believe that the relentless pursuit of happiness is due to man's inability to truly reconcile being/feeling happy with what he experiences on an almost daily basis on a spectrum of unhappiness:

- Disappointment

- Failure

- Unacceptance

- Rejection

- Bullying

- Abuse

- Injustice

- Suffering

- Poverty

- War

- Disability

- Disease

The result of man's expectation of happiness yet its continued elusiveness to him manifests in people running around like a chicken with their heads cut off (something my mom told me about that she saw as a little girl):

- Changing, leaving, coming back, or clinging to religion.

- Disenfranchisement with government, politics, political parties, and politicians.

- Entering into and dissolving marriages and relationships.

- Migration to different parts of the country or even moving abroad and traveling here, there, and everywhere.

- Cycling your money and investments in real estate, material goods, and a host of investments (stocks, bonds, hedge funds, etc.).

- Trying out a series of different educational pursuits, careers, and hobbies--surely one will be my passion, provide some meaning, or make me happy!

- Trying to squeeze more and more "things" into and out of a 24-hour day. 

- Looking for a quick fix through partying, pornography, sex, drugs, alcohol, and rock & roll. 

What's the trend in happiness now?

A relentless pursuit of innovation and transformation through technology, robotics, everything autonomous, self-healing, self-reproducing, searching for new (and perhaps better) worlds, and even time travel. 

Oh, and let's not forget pursuing a longer life (or the holy grail of immortality), so we have more time to try and be happy. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 12, 2015

Live To Live or Live To Die?

In The New York Times today, David Brooks presents “two sets of virtues, the resume virtue and the eulogy virtue.”

The resume virtues are the skills you need to get ahead in the marketplace, and the eulogy virtues are “whether you were kind, brave, honest, or faithful.”


While we'd like to believe that most feel that being a decent human being is more important than how much money we earn, unfortunately our education and economic systems are geared far more toward the latter, where it's widely acknowledged that "money makes the world go round!”


In fact, many will often sacrifice the moral high ground for landing on a bigger, cushier hill of worldly possessions and pleasures. 


Interestingly enough, my daughter asked me last week, whether it is better to personally live a happy life but die with a horrible reputation or to live selflessly, struggling with life challenges, but be revered after you die?


To me the answer was simple--live, learn, and grow regardless of momentary personal happiness. Do what’s right, period--honor and chivalry is alive and well. 


But my daughter told me that over 90% of people polled chose their happiness in life as their #1 goal.


I suppose it's easy to say what's the point of leaving a legacy if you were not happy living your life every day, but I would counter with what's the point in chasing life's daily pleasures, if you were a bum and everyone knows it?


The point isn't even what people say about us when we are alive or dead, but rather that we know that we tried our best to live as decent, ethical human beings and that hopefully, we left the world a better place than when we got here.


Sure, there is no blessing in being poor or unhappy--but living purely to satisfy one's voracious materialistic appetite is just being a selfish little pig--come on admit it!


On your deathbed, will you wish you that in your life you had more money and status or that you had been a better, more giving human being? 


I say forget the resume and the eulogy, just think about what will really gives you peace of mind and inner happiness and it's more than any amount of money can buy or any seduction you can imagine.  ;-)


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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September 14, 2014

Who Can Resist

It's the age old image of an angle sitting over one shoulder telling you to control yourself and do what's right and a little devil hanging over the other telling you to indulge and do whatever you want. 

The New York Times says that regardless of the push and pull of these two forces in our lives, we can learn to show restraint and stay goal-oriented.

By seeing the long-term rewards of good behavior, we can avoid pigging out in the moment. 

With Kids, it's called the Marshmallow Test--those who can resist eating a marshmallow for 15 minutes, get two marshmallows to enjoy later!

For adults, it may be that those who avoid the cake and ice cream today will live healthier and longer in the future. 

In Yiddish, there is the term sitzfleisch that refers to our ability to sit still and get our work done. 

The point is that if we can distract and distance ourselves from the indulgences of the moment, we can focus on the important things we really want to achieve with our lives. 

Of course, this is always easier said than done, because the two forces are both powerful and can be convincing.

For example, how many times can you hear, "Enjoy life a little, you aren't going to live forever" or "You've worked so hard, you deserve a little break", or "Come on, no one is perfect"...before you give in to a little excess? 

We are all tested in life, and we must try our best to pass as many as we can with flying colors--probably success is a healthy balance between living a little today in the here and now and working and saving abundantly for tomorrow's marshmallows.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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August 30, 2013

Pleasure At Pain

Why do people laugh and feel pleasure at other people's pain and misfortune?

The Wall Street Journal (20 August 2013) reviews the book, The Joy of Pain, on this topic. 

Schadenfreude is the German word for feeling pleasure at the calamity of others.

And we see people laugh, point, and otherwise gloat when others are hurting physically, emotionally, financially, and so on. 

When they fail and you succeed, you feel strong, powerful, self-confidant, and that you were right--and they were wrong!

Feelings of pleasure at other people's pain is partially evolutionary--survival of the fittest.

It is also a function of our personal greed and competitiveness--where we measure ourselves not by how well we are doing, but rather relative to how others around us are faring.

So for example, we may be rich and have everything we need, but if someone else has even a little more than us, we still are left feeling lacking inside. 

Thus, we envy others' good fortune and take pleasure in their misfortune.

In a sense, our success is only complete when we feel that we have surpassed everyone else, like in a sport competition--there is only one ultimate winner and world champion.

So when we see the competition stumble, falter, and go down, our hands go up with the stroke of the win!

Anyway, we deserve to win and they deserve to lose--so justice is served and that makes us feel just dandy. 

How about a different way--we work together to expand the living standard for all, and we feel genuinely glad for others' success and real empathy for their pain, and they too for us--and we go beyond our pure humanity to something more angelic. ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution for Lukas Vermeer)
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April 30, 2013

Never Worn, But Not For The Reason You Think

I remember learning for my MBA about people's shopping addiction (aka compulsive shopping) and how it consumes their time and money and fuels their self-esteem. 

Like a high gotten from alcohol, drugs, and sex, shopping can give people a relief from the everyday stresses that engulf them.


An interesting article in the Wall Street Journal (18 April 2013) called "A Closet Filled With Regrets" chronicles how people buy stuff they never wear and are sorry they bought it. 


In fact, the article states, "Only about 20% of clothes in the average person's closet are worn on a regular basis."


One example given is a Pulitzer Prize -winning author who spent $587,000 on Gucci items between 2010-2012, before seeking treatment for his addiction. 


A related disorder is shopper's remorse that occurs, because people second guess themselves and feel maybe an alternative would've been a better choice (i.e. they made a bad choice), they didn't really need the item to begin with (i.e. it was just impulsive), or that they spent too much (i.e. they got a bad deal). 


For me, as a child of Holocaust survivors, I find that when I purchase something nice (not extravagant), I put away and also never wear it. 


The difference for me is not that I have shoppers remorse, an addiction to shopping, or that I am unhappy with my purchase, but rather that I cannot wear it because I feel as a child of survivors that I have to save it--just in case. 


No, it's not rational--even though I am a very practical and rational person in just about every other way.


It's just that having seen what can happen when times are bad--and people have nothing--I cannot bear to grant myself the luxury of actually wearing or using something really good.


Perhaps also, I look at my parent's generation, who suffered so much, and think why am I deserving of this? 


They sacrificed and survived, so we (their children) could have it better--what every parent wants for their children, or should.


But still, in my heart, I know that I am the one who has had it easy compared to their lives, and so those purchases are going to stay right where they are--never worn until I donate them to Goodwill. 


I never really considered them mine anyway. ;-)


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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