Showing posts with label Interactions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Interactions. Show all posts

January 9, 2020

Pacemaker No-No!

So I learned that this is called a Van de Graaff Generator.

It generates very high voltage electricity. 

The guy setting it up asks me:
Do you have a pacemaker?

I respond in the negative and ask what's the danger zone on this thing.

He says: 
You probably wouldn't want to get within 10 feet of this!

Good to know. ;-)

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

(Please note that blog is not to be taken as medical advice.)
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December 12, 2018

Loneliness Is Death

There is a very important article in the Wall Street Journal today on the link of loneliness to death. 

Frightening loneliness statistics:

- One in 11 Americans over age 50 "lacks a spouse, partner, or living child."

- More than 1 in 4 baby boomers is divorced or never married.  

- 1 out of every 6 people lives alone. 

Research indicates that loneliness leads to early death. 

The impact of loneliness is equivalent to:

- Smoking 15 cigarettes a day

- Drinking 6 alcoholic beverages a day

Loneliness is worse for mortality than:

- Obesity 

- Physical activity

"The effect of isolation is extraordinarily powerful...we have to address loneliness," says the former administrator of the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services. 

Whether you are extroverted or introverted, we all need human interaction, sharing, caring, touch, and love.  

Truly, no man is an island!

Those that are stranded on loneliness island need to escape it and make their way back to human civilization.

Alone our lives are dull and stunted; but together, we have the inherent social dynamics to be able to experientially learn, grow, change and mature. 

Alone we die--together we live. 

It's not just power in numbers, it's life itself. 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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July 24, 2018

Bored Meetings

So it's been raining so much here in the DC area lately.

The result is that the hot Summer July temperatures are down in the cool 70's and the rain is flooding everywhere. 

When I got in the elevator this morning, someone goes to me:

"Did you see the leak in the hallway?  They are watering the tree with it."

And sure enough, there it was!

When all this rain finally stops, there is going to be a lot of cleanup and repairs to do. 

The other thing was yesterday, we were on the way to a board meeting in our synagogue. 

In the elevator, are two other people--a man and women--carrying binders.

They say to us:

"Are you going to the board meeting?"

Surprised, because I didn't recognize them from our synagogue, I respond affirmatively and ask to clarify:

"Oh, you're going to the board meeting too?  I don't recall seeing you there before."

Then the elevator stops and they start to get off--but it's to a different board meeting for the building.

When they see that we're going to a different floor, they start laughing:

"I guess we're going to different board meetings!"

I say:

"Yeah that's right, different board meetings, but we'll all probably be bored!

Another laugh by everyone, and we we're all off to the races. ;-)

(Source Photo:  Andy Blumenthal)
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June 23, 2018

That Look On Their Face

So I love that look on people's face when I say something that just startles them or takes them back a little. 

The other day when I got a haircut, the barber lady was talking to me (BTW, she's a very nice person).

At one point, she says something about my hair being a little different on each side. 

So I blurt out something like:

"Well, that's because my brains are pushing it out!"

I got the funniest look from her...yes, it was priceless.

First, she's like right, of course, your brains are pushing out your hair!

Then, she looks at me, and I start smirking, and she gives me the big eyes and raised eyebrows, like a combination of that's funny and now don't be such a wise guy. 

Then, we both started laughing. 

I love that. 

I love doing that with people. 

Being alive. 

Getting a reaction. 

Making them wonder for a second. 

Getting them to smile and laugh. 

Maybe my brains are pushing my hair out!  ;-)

(Source Art: Sean M., 8th Grade Montgomery County and Photo by Andy Blumenthal)
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April 16, 2018

Me Myself and I

I thought this was really fascinating about how we interact with others.

It's a theory by Martin Buber called the I-Thou relationship.

In every relationship, there are really 6 people in the room:

- Who I am.

- Who I want to be.

- Who I am perceived as.

-----------

- Who they are.

- Who they want to be.

- Who they are perceived as. 

----------

Taking about a break between reality, fantasy, and perception. 

Is it any wonder that there are so many communication breakdowns and relationship disappointments. 

We need to coalesce around a unified persona of I and thou--and if we don't know, perhaps we need to ask for clarification.

We don't want to talk past each other. 

We want to talk to and work with each other. 

I am me and you are you. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 10, 2018

On Time Is Late

Smart saying I heard today on time management:
Early is on time.
On time is late.
Late is unacceptable.
Having grown up in a very precise environment,  I can certainly appreciate this. 

Seriously, from a Yekke (Jewish German background), we were taught to be 15 to 30 minutes early--i.e. on time--for everything. 

I remember starting to get "little" reminders to get ready and get out the door well in advance and numerous times before the clock struck. 

Fashionably late or any other type is not in the vocabulary and frankly is a complete f*ckin insult. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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September 14, 2017

What Women Want From Men?

So I was talking to this nice gentleman.

He was telling me that he lost his wife of over 27 years to cancer--this happened over 15 years ago. 

And since then, he had a girlfriend who recently broke his heart and married someone else. 

I felt really bad and sorry for this nice man--who is always so friendly and intelligent.  

He says to me:
"Over the years, I've learned what women want from men."

I ask him inquiringly:
"And what is that?"

He's obviously glad that I asked, and he proceeds to tell me:
"Women want two things: curiosity and security."

Not understanding what he means by the first one, I ask:
"What do you mean curiosity?"

He looks intently at me and says:
"Women want to talk, and they want to know what's going on."

He explains to me that if you talk and be a good listener to women and provide (your part) materially in a stable relationship with them--they will be happy and you will be happy. 

This is sort of the "Happy wife, happy life" idea that I've heard before. 

Listen, even at this stage in my life, with a wife and two lovely daughters, I can still learn something about what makes women happy...teach me the pearls of wisdom and I will learn it well. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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September 12, 2017

Feeling Good Vibes

So what a nice compliment...

I'm talking with someone this week.

They're new, and so I tried to be generally nice and ask about them, show interest, and just be overall friendly and welcoming.  

It was amazing--these little things, and they made someone else feel comfortable and happy. 

They are smiling and go to me:
"I get good vibes from you!"

Wow, good vibes--awesome!  

And now I was happy too. 

I thought to myself, how often we goof and give off the wrong vibes and how easy it really is to just treat most people decently and sincerely, and get a good reaction. 

Yes, not everyone is easy to get along with and not everyone is nice.

But generally, I think it's good to try to be the type of person that others feel good vibes from. 

I'll take that and continue to try and spread the wealth. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 23, 2017

Nice Chompers

So this was funny-weird at the dentist. 

The dental hygienist comes in and does the cleaning.

Ultrasonic cleaner, scraping, polishing, flossing, rinse--all sort of routine. 

Next the dentist comes in--looks this side, that side, bite, bite again, looks some more. 

Then sort of out of the blue, the dentist goes to me:

"You got some nice chompers!"

Ah, never quite heard anyone say that before or quite the way this dentist said it.

Uh, a little strange sounding and feeling a little uncomfortable. 

I go out and tell me wife about this weird thing. 


And I start laughing and going...

"Doctor, you got some nice chompers there too!"

Somehow the way I said it, we both cracked up laughing. 

I'll never think of going to get my teeth cleaned at the dentist quite the same way again. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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September 12, 2016

Keeping Perspective

I thought this was a good photo to depict the importance of keeping perspective in life.

It is easy for any of us to "get bent out of shape" over big and little things alike. 

But if we sort of zoom out a little and see the larger perspective of things then perhaps we can realize that while our problems may be big for us, they are really small in comparison to the bigger picture or G-d's eye view. 

Yes, to us, little can be big, and big can be little, but if we could just recognize that we are part of something so much more, we can get that finer-tuned perspective on what's truly important and what's more trivial. 

It doesn't mean that our feelings of hurt, pain, loneliness, or injustices in the world are not important. 

They are significant for us to try to deal with them and make things better. 

Yet, we cannot go back in time and right all the wrongs, and we cannot change all the things about ourselves that we'd like to in a presto change-O wave of the hand moment. 

Life, change, and improvement are incremental. 

Sometimes, we make progress only then to fall back some. 

But overall, we need to keep the momentum of positive change for ourselves, forward.

But why are we even here? 

My wife said something the other day as follows:


"We are here in order to learn why we are here!"

Sounds confusing, but really maybe it's not. 

Our souls are sent here in the temporary vessels of our mortal bodies.

We are here so we can spend time here in this complex and interactive world, and learn from our relationships, positively and negatively with each other. 

The learning corrects our soul's imperfections and makes us better human and spiritual beings and brings us closer to G-d. 

At the same time that we are here, we should make it as pleasant as possible for ourselves and each other (but not over-the-top in a nihilistic and debauchery type of way). 

Stay fit, support yourselves and your family, live reasonably comfortably, so that you can pursue your karmic-driven learning and growth toward inner perfection. 

Like Buddha, we seek to purify our souls before they return to our Maker. 

In the realm of things, we are a very small microscopic human insect, but in the bigger picture, we are part of the ultimate magnanimous giving of opportunity to fix and maybe even come close to perfecting ourselves to be more like our beautiful and merciful Creator. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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May 22, 2015

Can You Just Stop And Think?

So oddly, one thing that many people these days find really hard to do is STOP AND THINK.

What do I mean?

Be alone, do nothing, and just take the time to be with yourself and think.

--without your smartphone, television, music, game, or even a book. 

Just you, the four walls, and your brain...thinking, thinking, thinking.

Feeling a little jittery, scared yet. 

Why are people afraid to stop and think? 

Is it because within the thinking is some craziness, fear, anxiety, and even remorse?

Are there overwhelming feelings and thoughts about issues, events, people, and places that are unresolved and painful. 

Also, by ourselves and in our thoughts, we can realize how weak, vulnerable, and mortal we are. 

If we are here in our own heads, maybe no one will even notice we are gone or maybe no one will even miss us--maybe they'll replace us?

We're so easily ditched, replaceable, just another character in a long cast of characters.

When we stop and think, do we worry about all the other things we're not doing or getting done...perhaps, we don't have the time to think, because we need to be doing, doing, doing. 

And if we're not moving forward doing something, then we are being left behind!

But doesn't thinking lead to more purposeful doing?

A little upfront thinking and planning, maybe can save you some serious time wasted just acting out. 

Somehow, like a prisoner in isolation though too much alone time with your own thoughts is enough to drive anyone crazy, docile, and ready to behave just to get out, interact with other human beings, and doing something.

We need to stay active, not be bored, so we don't think too much.

When I was in the hospital recently, one orderly named Kelvin, saw me sitting there by myself thinking, and he said to me, "Oh no, you don't want to have too much time to think. Block those thoughts out of your mind. Why don't you watch some TV?"  

Smart Kelvin. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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February 1, 2015

It's What You Can't Say

So I saw this game called Taboo when doing the grocery shopping today. 

(This one is the Jewish edition.)

Having never played this before, I looked it up and learned that it's a word game, where you have to give clues to the other team for them to guess a word, but you can't use the "taboo" words on the card. 

So for example, if the word is baseball, then some of the taboo words may be sport, pitcher, hitter, etc. 

So this is not an easy game per se. 

Thinking about the premise of the game though, I started to reflect that this isn't just a game, but in real life isn't so much of our interactions with others not about what we can say, but also the "taboo" things that we can't.

How many times do you want to tell someone off and explain what a jerk they have been acting lately or say your real feelings on a topic that you may feel passionately about, but it's somehow taboo to get into those things--you don't want to offend, be "politically incorrect", or perhaps you just think others may not agree with you or understand your point. 

What do we do? 

We "beat around the bush"--we express our dissatisfaction or disapproval or the opposite, with facial expressions, non-verbal cues, or perhaps we take a deep breath, hold back, or mince our words, so as not to somehow cross a social boundary of some sort. 

We want others to know us, accept us, respect us, and truly like us, but we can't always really be ourselves fully, because our words or feelings may be seen as taboo. 

In the end, sometimes we're discreet and "hold our tongue" and occasionally we blurt out what we really think and maybe are proud we did or are sorry for it afterwards--but wouldn't it be great if we could just be ourselves--without fear or retribution.

It shouldn't be taboo! ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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