Showing posts with label Heaven. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Heaven. Show all posts

January 15, 2014

Eulogy For My Beloved Mother, Gerda Blumenthal

We are here today to remember and honor my mother, Gerda Blumenthal, who passed away on Monday.  

My mother was my personal heroine, even as just two days earlier, a great hero of the Jewish people died as well--Ariel Sharon, a former Prime Minister of the State of Israel and a hero general who fought militarily to defend his people, but who also disengaged the State of Israel unilaterally from Gaza to make peace. 

Sharon’s role in history to secure the Jewish people came on the heels of the Holocaust where 6 million Jews were murdered – one of every three in the entire world!

To my mother, the holocaust was one of the defining moments in her life. She was just 5 years old, when the murderous Nazi secret police, the Gestapo, came up behind my mother and her father on the street in Germany, grabbed him and dragged him off to the concentration camps. My mother, a child, was left alone crying on the streets, until some neighbors found her and brought her home to her mother. Miraculously, her father was one of the few to actually be let out a number of weeks later, as he had already received visas for the family to come to America. He had lost 20-30 pounds in just those few weeks of brutal slave labor and beatings, but he and the family were free to come to this country and start anew. 

Like many of the immigrant families who were forced to flee persecution, my mother and her family arrived here penniless, and her father who didn't even know the language, worked as a tailor to try and support the family. My mother had wanted to pursue her education—and to be a nurse—but when she graduated high school, she was asked to immediately go to work to help the family earn a living in those difficult days. She did this dutifully and worked—mostly doing secretarial work, which was popular in those days—while raising my sister and I and taking care of my dad. My mom would put me on the school bus, rush off to work, and be home in time to make dinner for all of us. Mom was unwavering in her commitment to taking care of us. Mom taught me what family was, what it was to put family first, and what it was to work hard, very hard, always being there to take care of us, even when at times, it seemed like too much for any human being. 

My older sister and I are eight years apart. But there was another sibling, Susie, born between us. However, she died as a baby leaving my mother and father bereaved of their 2nd child still in the early years of their marriage. Despite this new challenge in their lives—and what seemed like another personal test—my mother carried on with my father to build the family, and I came along four years later.  I have always tried to make my mother and father proud of me, especially in light of the loss of their other child. 

My mother and father—were best friends, but like all loving couples, they also argued—but they always came back together again to make up and bond. And I learned well from them that in relationships, we can argue, but we can work things out—even though it’s not always easy to say I’m sorry or I was wrong, but we come back together because we are a family--we love each other and have that commitment. The loss of my mom is magnified, because of that deep love, but also because we are a small family that has always lived a hop, skip, and jump from each other—like one extended family. 

My mother and father put my sister and I through private Jewish school, all the years, and then through college and graduate school—so that I was able to get my MBA and my sister her PhD. Even in later years, she helped babysit for my children and was like a second mother to them, so that my wife, Dossy could get her PhD as well. She loved my daughters—Minna and Rebecca, and my niece, Yaffa, so much.  My mother and my father even moved here to Silver Spring in 2000—soon after we relocated here to work for the government—so they could be with us and the grandchildren—even though my mother really loved living in Riverdale, NY and the community and friends there, and would otherwise never have left there. 

I will never forget the endless sacrifices made for us, which contrasts to many other families in modern times, when people seem more focused on career, their own interests and happiness, and mired in the world of the Internet and social media. But my mom taught me that while we may want a lot of different things, we need to put our priorities in order and focus on what is really important—family, friends, and faith. 

Like Ariel Sharon who suffered a stroke eight years ago, my mother was diagnosed with the horrible disease of Parkinson’s—also eight years ago. My mother went from being the one who took care of everyone to where my father, in his own old age, and his own illness, had to take care of her. He did this with unbelievable courage and tirelessly, he did everything for her—everything! Even when we all thought she needed to go to the nursing home, he brought her home and cared for her himself for two years under extremely trying circumstances. Until this last April, when my mother was hospitalized again and was too ill to go home again. She went to the Hebrew Home In Rockville, and later because of her severe pain was put under hospice care. My mom unfortunately suffered horribly—more than we have ever seen anyone suffer. When she passed this week, I was horrified to lose my mother, as anyone would be, and at the same time, I was grateful to G-d that perhaps she now had some rest from the all the terrible illness and suffering and was finally at peace. 

She died on Monday almost immediately after the Rabbi said the final prayers with her, and so I hope that the prayers and good wishes of the Rabbi and all of us—her family and friends—are heard in heaven and usher her in as a righteous soul, loving wife, mother, and grandmother—and grant her everlasting peace and reward from the Almighty. 

Mom, we will always remember everything you have done for us. You taught us what a good traditional Jewish home and values are. Thank you for the love, care, and endless sacrifices. You will live on in the children and grandchildren and hopefully, our lives will be a merit for you. We love you always, and miss you. May G-d welcome you back, grant you peace, and bless you.

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August 26, 2013

Where Do You Find G-d?

My dad told me this joke over the weekend.

It's about the Rabbi who asked the little boy in school... 

"WHERE do you find G-d?"

Raising his voice again...

"Where do you find G-D?"

Stretching out his arms to the heavens....

"Where do YOU find G-d?"  

The boy rushes outside, nearly in tears, and finds his little brother and says:

"The Rabbi thinks we stole G-d."

I'm not sure if the joke itself is really funny or just the way my dad tells it. 

But I can almost see that child panicking and thinking he was being accused of something terrible. 

Anyway, as we all know G-d is everywhere and most importantly inside all of us. 

That's the spark that burns--our soul from above. 

(Source Photo: adapted from here with attribution to Kigaliwire)


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May 27, 2013

Going Up To The Clouds

It's been a week since Zach Sobiech, age 18, died from a rare bone cancer, called Osteosarcoma.

Zach was diagnosed at just the tender age of 14 and by 17 he was given less than a year to live.

During his last year on Earth, he wrote this beautiful song, Clouds.

The lyrics are amazing:

"And we'll go up, up, up
But I'll fly a little higher
We'll go up in the clouds because the view is a little nicer
Up here my dear

It won't be long now, it won't be long now
If only I had a little bit more time
It only I had a little bit more time with you."

Anticipating his death, Zach imagines, as a soul, flying up in the clouds--where the "view is a little nicer."

And he knows, time is short--and "it won't be long now"--and although he'll be able to see his family, friends, and loved ones from the clouds, he wishes he "had a little bit more time" with them on Earth. 

Death is hard at any age, but it is especially tragic when it is a child or someone who hasn't been able to fully live--and experience so many things or make all their contributions. 

But at any age, the loss of a good person, a kind person, a loving person--is a loss for all of us, left behind. 

Zach, some day we'll see you in the clouds with the other good people--it should be at the right time, merciful, and when our job here is done. 

It is okay to love life and the special people around us and to miss them terribly when we go, but we all go to the same place...to be with G-d, and each other, in Heaven.

In the after life, we can fly higher, with a nicer view, and reflect on how we did with the precious gifts and time given to us--whether long or short--before being called spiritually home again to our perfect maker. ;-)


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November 4, 2012

Heaven and Hell

Someone hung this sticky note off the wall in the Metro. 

It asks: "Do you want heaven or hell?"

Two incidents with some neighbors this weekend reminded me of this message: 

The first--there were some boxes put out for donation to Hurricane Sandy victims, and we saw one of the neighbors actually take stuff out of the charity boxes. Was he needy too--I don't really know. But I do wonder whether he'll enjoy his new jacket, at the expense of someone perhaps homeless and who lost everything in the Superstorm.

The second--I was hauling a really big box--it was extremely heavy and I come to find out that the wheels on the dolly were flat. It was nearly impossible to move on the the bare metal. All of a sudden, a wonderful person comes over--a stranger--and says "here, let me help you!" He accompanied me, pushing with me all the way to my destination. This guy was like an angel. 

Heaven or hell--we are tested everyday in our actions--some choose one, while some seem to gravitate to the other. 

Finally, I can't say again how grateful I am to the neighbor who went out of his way to help me--and in a difficult situation--I hope that I can learn from him!

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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September 3, 2012

Holocaust, Still a Nightmare In Our Souls


This is an amazing video of the horrors of the Holocaust expressed through modern-day Israeli Rap music and ballet interpretation.

The video is to the violin accompaniment of a broken and wrenching tune of Adon Olam--a prayer in which we recognize the almighty--"When all shall end, He alone, shall reign supreme--He was. He is. He shall be. In glory."

The main part of the video starts at 0:45.

The singer asks: "Why exterminate childrens' dreams, adults' memories?"

As he raps, we shall not forget--"A big scream...It is stuck inside me. Six million! burned in my memory."

Again asked: "Who has the right to extinguish a culture?"

With Iran--the free world is threatened again.

Now we must "not to be afraid, to stand up!"

And "to live in dignity and to die in dignity."

May G-d remember the souls of those murdered for merit and have mercy on mankind.

The children of David be strong--"The path to heaven is 'survival.'"

"Dust to dust, our souls go to heaven."

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August 5, 2012

Goodbye Mr. Yaffe

Last night, my dear friend lost his father--Mr. John Sommer.

He was known to many as just Mr. Yaffe--a twist on an electrical business, Yaffe Electric, that he owned for many years. 

John Sommer was a good man--he was a holocaust survivor who came to America, married his dear wife Yona, had two boys--Danny and Harry--and worked hard in his business for his family and his community. 

Yona, was a saintly woman, who died about 11 years ago from cancer and John carried on into his upper 80's with many an illness--finally succumbing on Friday night into a coma, and last night, he passed.

John and Yona were wonderful to me--as I was friends with their sons--and their home was like a 2nd home for me. 

I always felt like I had a place at their table and they made me feel like one of the family.

I remember saying the table prayers before and after meals there, talking about religion and politics, playing board and video games, watching movies, doing homework, and more. 

On the Jewish holidays, the Sommers invited my family to join them, and they joined us on the Sabbath at times, and on Thanksgiving, we meet at the restaurant together. 

The Sommers sat just two rows behind us in Synagogue, but that didn't stop some friendly banter between us all--G-d forgive us. 

Regularly after synagogue on weekdays, John Sommer would say let me give you a lift home--he was always willing to help others.

For the community, he frequently gave his electrician services to the synagogue for free and sponsored the kiddish (meal) after the services. 

The Sommers were at my Bar Mitzvah and my wedding, and I always remember their friendship and generosity. 

Losing good people is very painful--there are not enough of them in this world.

I pray that John is now with his wife, Yona, in heaven--and that they are at peace and that their legacy of good deeds continues long after. 

Good people should not suffer, but these people did as so many do--it is not easy to live or to die, but I have fond memories of what they gave to me and I am grateful to them. 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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June 23, 2012

A Boy Whose Name Is Light


Recently, I inspired by an award-winning documentary that I watched on Netflix called Praying With Lior (2007).

The movie is about the development and spiritual maturation of a Jewish child with Down Syndrome to his Bar Mitzvah (and a few years past). 

As a young child, Lior Liebling is comforted by his mother, who is a Rabbi, who teaches Lior to pray and sing to G-d. 

She holds him and they share an amazing bond both maternal and spiritual that never leaves Lior. 

Unfortunately, the mother has breast cancer and passes away when Lior is only 6.

Right before his bar mitzvah, Lior goes to his mother's gravesite and clings to it saying, "I miss you," and then breaks down in tears that I could feel or imagined rising up to the heavens itself. 

Lior is deeply loved by his family--father (also a Rabbi), stepmother, and 3 siblings--who play, engage, teach him, and learn from him as well. 

Lior means light in Hebrew, and Lior brings light to everyone he meets--inspiration to overcome challenge, deep love of G-d and community, and faith that his mother is watching over him. 

Lior makes it to his bar-mitzvah--and becomes a proverbial Jewish man--he says the blessing, reads from the Torah, celebrates with his family and loved ones, and even gives a speech on the importance of Torah. 

At the celebration, he goes over to another retarded girl, and says something about how she is special and that "I am going to marry you."

I watched this young man, Lior, pray with a rigor that I have not been able to do for some time, and I was inspired not by the words he said, nor the song he sang, or even the cheer he brought others, but rather I think I was moved by the simple sincerity and purity of his heart. 

Lior didn't want anything, didn't have an agenda, wasn't trying to do anything to anybody, he was just a soul that reached out to others--loving them, hugging them, kissing them, and yes, praying with them--often actually leading the services. 

One of Lior's classmates that was interviewed said that everyone has a test, and Lior's is an incredibly difficult one--but he is succeeding extraordinarily by not only surviving with his disability, but also showing others the way. 

Thank you Lior for being such an amazing inspiration to us all--may you go from strength to strength and someday reunite with not only your heavenly father, but also your mother who awaits to sing and pray with you in great joy again. 

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May 22, 2012

L'Chaim--Live It Well!

I found an article on the consolation of death "buried" in my papers from a couple of months ago--and I'm glad I did. 

The Wall Street Journal (10 April 2012) has a very interesting book review of "Death" by Shelly Kagan.

The book is about how do we live knowing that some day we will die--how do we console ourselves?

Here are a combination of the the ideas reviewed and my thoughts on them:

- The Hard Stop--Since life and death, for each of us, cannot coexist, we are either alive or dead--"no one will ever encounter their own death"--so there is nothing to worry about.  

- Not Me--We live life never really believing that we will die--instead, "death is something that happens to other people."

- Live Without Attachments--As Buddhism teaches that we should cast off attachments, self-concern, and suffering--hence, the loss of own self is a "nonevent."

- Live The Moment
-- We should live in the present and enjoy life, rather than mourn the past or worry about the future.


- Live a Full Life--Live a full and meaningful life, and then perhaps, we "don't cry because it's over, [but rather] smile because it happened."

- Leave a Legacy--If we leave a legacy of our children and good deeds, then we live on even once we are physically gone. 

I was always taught that since no one ever really came back from the other side to tell us what happens to us when we die, we should not be overly focused on it.

I remember overhearing some old men in synagogue debating what happens to us when we die--one taking the position that we go heaven and the other stating that death was the end (he put it more crudely though-something about us being dead no different than a dead dog!)

In the end, since it doesn't pay to worry about what we don't know and perhaps can't even really fathom, I think all we can do is our best every moment that we are alive--and leave the rest to sort out to G-d, afterward.

The consolation then is if you tried your best, what more can anyone ask of themselves or others?

In terms of the picture, the L'Chaim candy bar is a little reminder not to take everything in life so seriously either--live life and live it well. ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution to Uberculture, Jeremy Noble)

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March 20, 2012

Like A Piece of Heaven


My daughter is quite the photographer--a great combination with her communications major.  

I posted this photo from her because it is truly like a piece of heaven to me.  

I can't believe that trees can actually grow like this. 

Cherry blossoms have got to be up there as one of the greatest gifts this country has ever received--thank you Japan!  

This year, in particular, the Cherry Blossoms are so lush and full--and they seem to be on almost every block in Washington, D.C.

Welcome to the Spring season!


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December 28, 2011

People--What's Inside

People can perform good and kind deeds--they can love and care and share, they can be giving and help others in need, and they can innovate and create magnificent and beautiful works.
Yet, as we all know, people can also do horrible things. It's strange that when people do such things, we call them inhumane acts--I guess that helps to divorce us from their behavior, which we cannot understand or accept.
In Hebrew School we learned that it's as if there is a good angel over one shoulder telling you to do the "right" thing, and a "bad" angel over the other shoulder telling you to do the base and corrupt thing.
We were told that we all have free choice--to choose good over evil--some succeed and some do not. Unfortunately, there are way too many instances of the latter.
- Last week, I followed in horror the news story out of New York, where an elderly women in an elevator was cornered by a man who proceeded to douse her with gasoline and set her afire with a Molotov cocktail. This woman didn't have a fighting chance. She died a gruesome and senseless death.
- This week, I watched "To Catch a Predator" on Dateline with Chris Hansen. After many sessions airing, it is unbelievable that dozens upon dozens of sexual predators keep coming out of the woodwork and descending upon those who they believe are young teens home alone for what they think will be a "good time." This week, they caught a married man with 3 children of his own, someone who worked for Nickelodeon, and even a doctor!
What is remarkable about the Dateline series is that most of the predators know exactly what they are doing is wrong--they openly acknowledge it--yet they seem helpless to stop or control themselves. Many pursued the children even when they suspected it was a sting operation and they would get caught. The bad angel must really have their ears and consciences!
Of course, these examples are just that--snapshots of scary, bad things that people do every day, every moment in time. The flip side is that there are also good people doing extraordinarily good things too. The "CNN Heroes" series is a great example highlighting people feeding the hungry, sheltering the homeless, healing the sick, and protecting the downtrodden. These are just but some of these admirable and giving actions of decent people in our society.
Sometimes even it's the simple things that no one knows about or sees, but you know you did good. For example, the other day, there was some trash on the staircase going down to the metro. Someone could have easily slid, tripped, and fallen down the stairs. But after seeing numerous people just walk by it and pretend it wasn't even there, one person stopped and took the time to move it and prevent anyone from getting hurt. A simple thing, yet a small good deed in time.
Regardless of how we choose to live our live, the point is really that every choice/action we make can be a pivotal one--like our actions on a scale of justice--that can throw the world (our individual world or literally the entire world) into judgement for good or bad, and therefore we should choose wisely.
In the Torah, where G-d's angels are sent to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah, Abraham tries to negotiate for the cities by whether their are 50, 20, 10 and so on good people there. Good people and their deeds count.
So what's inside people that really counts--it's potential. People have the potential to do the greatest acts of love, kindness, and self-sacrifice. But they also have the ability to do the unthinkable and inhumane.
It's challenging to know who and exactly what we are dealing with every day.
Maybe that's where the expression comes from: to hope for the best, but expect the worst. Judge everyone as if their intentions are good, but don't be too surprised when they are not.
While hope and expectations are part of our daily interaction with others, they are not enough. We need to be demanding of good choices of ourselves. Maybe even harder yet, we need to have the courage and strength to stand up to those who choose to listen to the demons that drive them.
(Source Photo: here)

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October 8, 2011

Thank You Steve Jobs


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