April 30, 2013
Never Worn, But Not For The Reason You Think
Like a high gotten from alcohol, drugs, and sex, shopping can give people a relief from the everyday stresses that engulf them.
An interesting article in the Wall Street Journal (18 April 2013) called "A Closet Filled With Regrets" chronicles how people buy stuff they never wear and are sorry they bought it.
In fact, the article states, "Only about 20% of clothes in the average person's closet are worn on a regular basis."
One example given is a Pulitzer Prize -winning author who spent $587,000 on Gucci items between 2010-2012, before seeking treatment for his addiction.
A related disorder is shopper's remorse that occurs, because people second guess themselves and feel maybe an alternative would've been a better choice (i.e. they made a bad choice), they didn't really need the item to begin with (i.e. it was just impulsive), or that they spent too much (i.e. they got a bad deal).
For me, as a child of Holocaust survivors, I find that when I purchase something nice (not extravagant), I put away and also never wear it.
The difference for me is not that I have shoppers remorse, an addiction to shopping, or that I am unhappy with my purchase, but rather that I cannot wear it because I feel as a child of survivors that I have to save it--just in case.
No, it's not rational--even though I am a very practical and rational person in just about every other way.
It's just that having seen what can happen when times are bad--and people have nothing--I cannot bear to grant myself the luxury of actually wearing or using something really good.
Perhaps also, I look at my parent's generation, who suffered so much, and think why am I deserving of this?
They sacrificed and survived, so we (their children) could have it better--what every parent wants for their children, or should.
But still, in my heart, I know that I am the one who has had it easy compared to their lives, and so those purchases are going to stay right where they are--never worn until I donate them to Goodwill.
I never really considered them mine anyway. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
March 15, 2013
Hurry Up and Wait
This guy from the military used to joke that they were always being told to hurry up only to find that once they got to their destination, they had to sit around and wait--he called this "Hurry up and wait!"
It's a paradox of our times that we are constantly in a hurry to get to work, have our meetings, get our work done, get home, and a million and one other things. PTA meeting or baseball practice anyone?
From fast food to information at the speed of light, it's like we know we are up against the clock and no matter how fast we go it's not fast enough.
Yet, it is exactly in rushing from thing to thing and to get things done that we really miss the point--to savor every moment.
I think the saying take time to smell the roses is very important. And someday if you don't, you will look back and wonder where did all the time go and why was it so--fast and--miserable.
The Wall Street Journal (14 March 2013) has a book review today on "The Slow Fix" by Carl Honore.
Honore says we have a "cultural addiction to speed" and he advises that we take more time to enjoy life--our work, our relationships, our interests, and I would add our spirituality.
It's funny but in the book review, it mentions how a Viennese priest admits that he even prays to fast. And I have to chuckle at that because I too remember from my childhood, so many synagogue services, where speed praying and prayer by rote took the joy and meaning away the true connection I wanted to be building with my maker.
Even in a work setting, often everything seems like a #1 priority and there is more to do than there are hours in the day or people to do it.
While working quickly and efficiently is desirable, when people are overworked and overwhelmed that is how costly mistakes happen and people get burned out.
In all aspects of our lives, we need to make good progress, but at the same time, ensure that our lives are filled with meaning that you can only get by paying attention to each and every wonderful moment. ;-)
(Source Photo: here with attribution to Jayme Frye)
Hurry Up and Wait
December 3, 2012
The Information High
A new article by Andy Blumenthal called "The Information High" at Public CIO Magazine (29 November 2012).
"In addition to being slaves to our things--including technology gadgets--we are also addicted to the data and information they serve up."
Hope you enjoy! ;-)
Andy
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
The Information High
September 1, 2012
Weighing the Odds
This was a very effective ad that I saw in the doctor's office for weight loss.
Look at all the problems that excess weight causes.
And see how unattractive that big gut can be--no offense.
While this week, research studies on monkeys were reported not to extend life span, I think we all know intuitively well that staying "trim and fit" is the way to go from a health perspective.
There is a good saying that I plastered up a couple of years back that said "nothing tastes as good as thin feels!"
Many years ago, my cousin David was diagnosed with brain cancer. He tried all sorts of traditional medical treatments, and nothing much was working. After consulting some nutrition experts, his wife supported him in going on a macrobiotic diet, and this seemed to help him for some time. Finally though David succumbed to the brain tumor after struggling about 10 years.
This past week, a friend of mine, who has had some health problems recently, told me he was trying the vegan diet too for a couple of weeks, but already after a few days was touting how much better he was feeling.
From my experience, the carbs and processed foods are the worst for us--and on top of it, completely addictive.
When I am strong enough mentally, I really believe in Dr. Atkins high protein diet--although after a few days, you lose your appetite for good reason--it tastes, horrible.
With the odds against those carrying around a lot of extra pounds, we all need to keep fighting the good fight here--against the battle of the bulge.
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
Weighing the Odds
July 21, 2012
Stark Raving Internet Crazy
Physically:
- "Americans have merged with their machines"--literally starring at computer screen "at least eight hours a day, more time than we spend on any other activity, including sleeping."
- Most college students are not just unwilling, but functionally unable to be without their media links to the world."
Psychologically:
- "Every ping could be a social, sexual, or professional opportunity" so we get a (dopamine) reward for getting and staying online.
- Heavy internet use and social media is correlated with "stress, depression, and suicidal thinking" with some scientists arguing it is like "electronic cocaine" driving mania-depressive cycles.
Chemically:
- "The brains of Internet addicts...look like the brains of drug and alcohol addicts."
- Videogame/Internet addiction is linked to "structural abnormalities" in gray matter, namely shrinkage of 10 to 20% in the areas of the brain responsible for processing od speech, memory, motor control, emotion, sensory, and other information,."
- The brain "shrinkage never stopped: the more time online, the more the brain showed signs of 'atrophy.'"
Socially:
- "Most respondents...check text messages, email or their social network 'all the time' or 'every 15 minutes.'
- "Texting has become like blinking" with the average person texting (sending or receiving) 400 times3,700 times!
- "80% of vacationers bring along laptops or smartphones so they can check in with work while away."
- "One in 10 users feels "fully addicted' to his or her phone," with 94% admitting some level of compulsion!
At the extreme:
- "One young couple neglected its infant to death while nourishing a virtual baby online."
- "A young man bludgeoned his mother for suggesting he log off."
- "At least 10...have died of blood clots from sitting too long" online.
These are a lot of statistics, and many of these are not only concerning, but outright shocking--symptoms of bipolar disorder, brain shrinkage, and murderous behavior to name a few.
Yet, thinking about my own experiences and observations, this does not ring true for the vast majority of normal Internet users who benefit from technology intellectually, functionally, socially, and perhaps even spiritually.
Yes, we do spend a lot of time online, but that is because we get a lot out of it--human beings, while prone to missteps and going to extremes, are generally reasoned decision-makers.
We aren't drawn to the Internet like drug-abusers to cocaine, but rather we reach for the Internet when it serves a genuine purpose--when we want to get the news, do research, contact a friend or colleague, collaborate on a project, make a purchase, manage our finances, watch a movie, listen to music or play a game and more.
These are not the benefits of a drug addict, but the choices of rational people using the latest technology to do more with their lives.
Are there people who lose control or go off the deep-end, of course. But like with everything, you can have even too much of a good thing--and then the consequences can be severe and even deadly.
Certainly people may squirrel away more often then they should for some un-G-dly number of hours at a computer rather than in the playground of life--but for the most part, people have taken the technology--now highly mobile--into the real world, with laptops, tablets, and smartphones being ubiquitous with our daily rounds at the office, on the commute, walking down the street, and even at the dinner table.
Is this a bad thing or are we just afraid of the (e)merging of technology so deeply into every facet of lives?
It is scary in a way to become so tied to our technology that it is everywhere all the time--and that is one major reason why cyber attacks are such a major concern now--we are hopelessly dependent on technology to do just about everything, because it helps us to do them.
From my perch of life, the Internet does not break people or attract broken souls except on the fringes; more typically it puts people together to achieve a higher individual and social aggregate capability then ever before.
If the pressure to achieve 24/7 would just come down a few notches, maybe we could even enjoy all this capability some more.
Now I just need to get off this darn computer, before I go nuts too! ;-)
(Source Photo: here adapted from and with attribution to Cassie Nova)
Stark Raving Internet Crazy
May 12, 2012
It's Not iStuff, It's Your iFuture
It is written by David Gelernter, Professor of Computer Science at the prestigious Yale University and I was much dismayed to read it.
With all due respect, Gelernter makes the case--and a poor one at that--for keeping kids away from technology.
He calls technology devices and the Internet, "the perfect anti-concentration weapon...turning a child's life into a comedy of interruptions."
Gelernter states pejoratively that the "whole point of modern iToys...is not doing anything except turning into a click vegetable."
Moreover, Gelernter goes too far treating technology and the Internet as a waste of time, toys, and even as dangerous vices--"like liquor, fast cars, and sleeping pills"--that must be kept away from children.
Further, Gelernter indiscriminately calls en masse "children with computers...little digital Henry VIIIs," throwing temper tantrums when their problems cannot be solved by technology.
While I agree with Gelernter that at the extreme, technology can be used to as a escape from real, everyday life--such as for people who make their primary interaction with others through social networking or for those who sit virtually round-the-clock playing video games.
And when technology is treated as a surrogate for real life experiences and problem solving, rather than a robust tool for us to live fuller lives, then it becomes an enabler for a much diminished, faux life and possibly even a pure addiction.
However, Gelernter misses the best that technology has to offer our children--in terms of working smarter in everything we do.
No longer is education a matter of memorizing textbooks and spitting back facts on exams in a purely academic fashion, but now being smart is knowing where to find answers quickly--how to search, access, and analyze information and apply it to real world problems.
Information technology and communications are enablers for us do more with less--and kids growing up as computer natives provide the best chance for all of us to innovate and stay competitive globally.
Rather then helping our nation bridge the digital divide and increase access to the latest technologies and advance our children's familiarity with all things science, technology, engineering and math (STEM), Gelernter wants to throw us back in time to the per-digital age.
With the ever rapid pace with which technology is evolving, Gelernter's abolishing technology for children needlessly sets them back in their technology prowess and acumen, while others around the world are pressing aggressively ahead.
Gelernter may want his kids to be computer illiterate, but I want mine to be computer proficient.
iStuff are not toys, they are not inherently dangerous vices, and they are not a waste of our children's time, they are their future--if we only teach and encourage them to use the technology well, balanced, and for the good.
(Source Photo: here with attribution to "Extra Ketchup," Michael Surran)
It's Not iStuff, It's Your iFuture
August 27, 2011
Social Media, Fulfilling Our Every Need?
Social Media, Fulfilling Our Every Need?
July 31, 2011
Technology Anonymous
Technology Anonymous
January 16, 2011
"Your Brain On Google"
"Your Brain On Google"
September 4, 2009
Internet Addiction—The Real Thing
Yes, people talk about having an Internet addiction and chuckle. But this is becoming the real thing!
AP (3 September 2009) reports that ReSTART, the first U.S. residential treatment center for Internet addiction opened near Redmond (home of Microsoft).
The center offers a 45-day program costing $14,000 to treat pathological computer use.
This includes “obsessive use of video games, texting, Facebook, eBay, Twitter” and more.
So far only one patient is in treatment, but more are sure to be coming.
“There are many such treatment centers in China, South Korea, and Taiwan—where Internet addiction is taken very seriously—and many psychiatric experts say it is clear that Internet addiction is real and harmful.”
How does using the Internet or computer harm people?
“The effects of addiction are no joke. They range from loss of a job or marriage to car accidents for those who can’t stop texting while driving. Some people have did after playing video games for days without a break, generally stemming from a blood clot associated with being sedentary.”
Experts are debating whether to include Internet Addiction in the next version of the Diagnostic Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders 2012.
“’Internet addicts’ are folks who have severe depression, anxiety, disorders, or social symptoms that make it hard for them to live a full, balanced life and deal face-to-face with other people.”
What are the warning signs (according to AP)?
- Preoccupied thinking about computers and the Internet
- Using it longer than intended
- Using it for increasing amounts of time
- Repeatedly making unsuccessful efforts to control use
- Jeopardizing relationships, school or work to spend time online
- Lying to cover the extent of use
- Using it to escape problems or feelings of depressions
I suppose everything can be taken to an extreme even computer use. In which case, even highly useful, productive, and transformative information technology can be misused and abused.
Oddly enough, we seem to be feeding the addiction like a glutton—there is an almost endless array of new computer gadgets and applications giving almost endless reason to get online and soak up all the information, social media, e-commerce, and entertainment available. It’s all very alluring and compelling.
Seems pretty easy for people to go of the deep end with this.
So when was the last time you stayed off the Internet for more than 24 hours? How many of you are compulsively checking email, Blackberrys, Facebook, Twitter, IM, texting, and surfing the net? I would even throw in compulsively on the cell phone—yap, yap, yap.
Will there come a time when people reject this 24/7/365 e-lifestyle and push for greater online moderation?
Looking at other types of addictions, at one time people smoked like chimneys and then the realization of the negative side effects led to people putting on the nicotine patches or otherwise going cold turkey, either kicking the habit or greatly cutting back.
The same occurred with a period in society of heavy drinking/alcoholism followed by prohibition and then a more moderate acceptance of social drinking.
It seems that the addiction line gets crossed when people can no longer control their behavior and it results in them hurting themselves or others.
The problem is that we don’t have very good foresight with any of this and we only tend to see the negative consequences of overuse/abuse only after some time—that the empirical nature of science.
So will we wait for a higher prevalence of socio/psychological disorders from Internet addiction, greater numbers of burnt out workers, higher divorce rates, more child neglect, further accidents because people can’t stop their darn texting while driving OR will we be able to foresee the unintended, but certain effects of doing too much of a good, Internet thing?
Internet Addiction—The Real Thing
August 22, 2009
Technology, A Comfort to the Masses
Typically, as technologists, we like to point out the great things that technology is doing for us—making us more productive, facilitating more convenience, allowing us to perform feats that humans alone could not do, and enabling us to connect with others almost without regard to space and time. And truly, we are fortunate to live in a time in history with all these new unbelievable capabilities—our ancestors would be jealous in so many ways.
Yet, there is a flip side to technology—what some refer to as the 24x7 society—“always on”—that we are creating, in which life is a virtual non-stop deluge of emails, voicemails, videoconferencing, messaging, Friending, Linking-in, blogging, tweeting, YouTubing, and more.
We are becoming a society of people living in a Matrix-type virtual world, where we go around addicted to the online cyber world and yet in so many ways are unconscious to the real-world relationships that are suffering in neglect and silence.
A fascinating article in the Wall Street Journal, 22-23 August 2009 entitled, Not So Fast, by John Freeman states that “we need to protect the finite well of our attention if we care about our relationships.”
Certainly, online communications and connections are valuable, and in many ways are meaningful to us. They can create wonderful opportunities to bond with those near and far, including those who would be normally beyond our reach geographically and temporally. For me it’s been great reconnecting with old friends from schools, jobs, and communities. And yes, who would think that Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger would be but a FaceBook message away for me?
Yet while all the online interaction is fulfilling for us in so many ways—filling voids of all sorts in our lives—in reality the connections we make in the virtual world are but a tiny fraction of the real world human-to-human relationships we have in terms of their significance and impact.
The Journal article puts it this way: “This is not a sustainable way to live. This lifestyle of being constantly on causes emotional and physical burnout, workplace meltdowns, and unhappiness. How many of our most joyful memories have been created in front of a screen?”
One of the biggest fears that people have is not their own mortality, but that of being left alone in the corporeal world—for each of us, while a world unto ourselves, are small in the vastness of all that is around us. Perhaps to feel less alone, people amass and encircle themselves with great amounts of familiar, comforting, and loving people and things. And while people have these, they are connected, grounded, loved, and they are comforted that they are not alone.
But the harsh reality is that no matter how much we have in our lives, people are beings onto themselves, and over time, unfortunately and extremely painfully, all worldly things are ultimately lost.
The Journal states: “We may rely heavily on the Internet , but we cannot touch it, taste it, or experience the indescribable feeling of togetherness that one gleans from face-to-face interaction.”
Connections are great. Virtual relationships can be satisfying and genuine. All the technology communication mechanisms are fast, efficient, and powerful in their ability to reach people anytime and anywhere. Yet, we must balance all these with the people we care about the most. We cannot sacrifice our deepest and most intimate relationships by sitting in front of a computer screen morning, noon, and night and walking around with the BlackBerry taking phone calls and emails at our kids' school play, on their graduation day, and during their wedding recital. We are missing the boat on what is really important. We have forgotten how to balance. We have gone to extremes. We are hurting the ones we truly love the most.
“We need to uncouple our idea of progress from speed, separate the idea of speed from efficiency, pause and step back enough to realize that efficiency may be good for business and governments, but does not always lead to mindfulness and sustainable, rewarding relationships.”
Finally, with all the technology, we are in a sense becoming less human and more mechanical—like the Borg, in Star Trek—with BlackBerrys and Netbooks as our implants. Let’s find some time to pull the plug on these technologies and rediscover the real from the virtual.
Technology, A Comfort to the Masses