Love the red.
Love the spikes on the door.
Would like a little tougher handle on this.
But overall that's a door! ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 22, 2019
The Red Door
Love the red.
Love the spikes on the door.
Would like a little tougher handle on this.
But overall that's a door! ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 21, 2019
3 Types of Dumping
"No Dumping"
Dumping can refer to at last 3 different types of things and none of them are any good:
1) Dogs - When people are inconsiderate with the animals and they take a "dump" and people don't clean up after them (leaving the messy stink for you to step in).
2) Trash - When people throw their trash in the dump or what they consider to be a convenient dumping ground and they make a huge mess of the surroundings (like the used mattress on the side of the road).
3) Emotions - When people dump their emotions and problems on others; they just sort of let it all out and while they may feel better (i.e. a nice catharsis), now you feel like sh*t!
Overall, I can't think of any good connotation to dumping, so maybe people should stop doing it--dogs, trash, and problems. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 20, 2019
Having Each Other
Incredibly painful.
Difficult getting up from sitting or laying position.
Today, I was trying to walk it off a little.
One of my kids was walking with me taking good care of me.
We ran into a neighbor.
She was nice and asked about what happened.
I told her in brief and said how grateful I was for my daughter taking me for a little walk while I try to heal with G-d's help.
She smiled and said how lucky I was (which I acknowledged).
I asked if she had any kids, thinking that she did.
But she goes to me:
I have no one!
I was a little surprised that she didn't have anyone and how she said it.
I sort of repeated it quizzically.
She goes:
Well I did have a cat but she was 19 years old and I had to put her down.
I felt really bad for her, especially since I know she had an operation this last year and is planned for another one coming up.
I said that we're her neighbors and friends and that she can call on us whenever she needs someone.
This whole thing just made me so upset--no one should be so alone.
I really pray that G-d has mercy on his children and that no one should be alone and that we should all have caring and loving people around us always. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 19, 2019
Get Over It
"Sh*t Happens So Get Over It."There are no perfect lives out there.
I reminded again this week how everyone has something: Mark Herd, Co-CEO of Oracle, died at 62 and and Elijah Cummings, elected to 12 terms in the House of Representatives, died at 68.
All the success int he world on the surface doesn't mean that there isn't plenty of schlimazel (misfortune) under the surface.
Unfortunately, sh*t definitely happens in life and we can get all spun up over it or we can take everything in faith and stride.
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
What does kill takes us to the next phase of existence.
All you can do is your best, the rest is in the hands of the Almighty above. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 18, 2019
Check Out Those Rims
Pimp my ride! LOL
Check out those awesome gold rims with this blue "oldies" car.
This was definitely a standout even down there where there are plenty of Bentleys and Lamborghinis driving around.
The owner of the car gave me a big thumbs up when I tool this photo.
Hope you enjoy and Shabbat Shalom!
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 17, 2019
Capital One Cafe Catastrophe
Well I saw my first real one in Fort Lauderdale this week.
It was big, bright, comfortable and had children's games and a host of meeting and breakout rooms.
They even gave us two cards for some free coffee at the embedded Pete's Coffee.
It was a corner store in a large, expensive space.
It was great place to get some work done or relax.
But aside for a cash machine or so, there was nothing that I could see having to do with banking in this place.
Also, there were also almost no customers for the coffee.
Basically, it is totally confusing idea from a marketing and branding perspective--Is it a bank or a coffee house? And why would I go to Capital One to get coffee or to Pete's Coffee to do my banking????
While I think that Capital One has literally outdone Starbucks in building a great cafe space, I don't think anyone will actually get what this is or why it is!
My guess is that whoever came up with this idea is going to be looking for a job within about 6 big money-losing months. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 16, 2019
Searching For Gold
He's in the ocean dressed in a full wetsuit with a mask over his face, a hat on his head, and the headphones over his ears.
He had a metal detector and wand looking for lost gold in the water right off the beach.
But didn't see him find a dime the whole time we were there.
I can't believe these guys can actually find enough jewelry on the beach to make this worth while.
Back and forth with the wand...searching, searching. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 15, 2019
The Coming Great American Aliyah
If you just open your eyes and have faith, you will know that you will be going to Israel–the question isn’t if, but when! What G-d has decreed, no man can annul. There are three types of ways things will unfold for American Jews: Some will go to Israel on their own,”nicely.” Others will be going only when they absolutely have to–“not so nicely.” The third group will not be going–unfortunately, as difficult as it is to say, they won’t make it. While this is all about the fulfillment of messianic times, and we don’t know when precisely it will all transpire, I pray that people (including myself) will choose to plan intelligently for the future to make aliyah in good times, and that their shouldn’t be pain and suffering for the Jewish people in getting there, but rather that it is an amazing experience filled with endless blessings.
May G-d bring us in peace, prosperity, and health to fulfill His promise of the ingathering and to rebuild the Temple and bring Mashiach to the world.
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 13, 2019
Filled With Love
Actions Speak Louder Than Words
When we see wrong and evil in this world, we have a duty to stand up and speak out with truth and integrity, to be a good influence and guide things for the better, and even to repair the world ("Tikkun Olam")...Words are perhaps a good start, but also, "words are cheap." The way to really judge someone is less by their words, and far more so by their actual deeds. Moreover, sometimes words aren't enough and we need to not just say something, but do something! As Edmund Burke stated, "The only thing necessary for triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." It's great to speak out when we see wrong, but more than that we have to be willing, when necessary, to act out--to do something.
As Jews, we need to be ready, willing, and able to stand up for what is right in the never ending war of good over evil in this world--regardless of silver or lead, G-d forbid--with our words and with our deeds.
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 11, 2019
Rainbow Card Display
Instead of postcards in the display holder, they put colored glass.
Then just let the sun shine in and look at the awesome wall display.
Might be fun to swap around to get different patterns and blends.
As a kid, I always used to turn the display to see what just around the bend, in this case you get the disco effect.
Color and light play nice together. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 10, 2019
Adding A Very Special Facebook Friend
My parents passed away 5-6 years ago already.
I always miss them so much!
Somehow, on Facebook, my dad's Facebook profile came up, which I was surprised to find.
Looking at it, I saw under his friends was of course, my mom.
I didn't even know my mom had a Facebook page (I don't think she ever really used it).
But I was so curious, I clicked on her profile.
I saw the prominent blue and white button to "Add Friend."
And I saw my hand reaching to press for that button.
I so wanted to reach out and be able to be with, see, communicate with her again.
Then I stopped myself realizing that the friend request, unfortunately, couldn't go to Heaven.
If only it could...I would be so happy to press that button and have my mom hear from me again. ;-)
(Photo of my dear parents from Florida)
October 8, 2019
Interplanetary Travel - Coming Soon
Awesome presentation on Interplanetary Travel by Charlie Kuehmann, VP Materials Engineering at SpaceX and Tesla.
Interplanetary travel and colonization is one of the most exciting possibilities for mankind.
It's all just beginning (we've only been in orbit for about 50 years).
One of the keys Charlie mentioned at SpaceX and Telsa is how quickly we learn.
It's okay to fail, as long as we learn quickly and progress from it.
The progress with reusable rockets at SpaceX is impressive.
Can't wait for more to come soon. ;-)
(Credit Video: Andy Blumenthal)
Where Are We Going
To me, it begs the question of where are we going in our lives.
The terrestrial landscape combined with the light at the end of the tunnel effect as the sky is provocative and at the same time almost hypnotic.
It also makes me feel the enormity of the universe versus the smallness of just a man.
I see myself standing on the red hilltop looking into that big sky and wondering about so many things.
In the end, believing that we don't have all the answers, but that we are in G-d's good hands. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 7, 2019
It Spills Over
But rather is spills over entirely.
There is nothing, nothing left inside.
Worse even is when the glass completely shatters.
Then there isn't even a vessel anymore.
All that's left is to pick up the pieces.
As humans, we try to fill up the water, stop the water inside from spilling out, and to save the glass.
The rest is in G-d's hands.
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 6, 2019
Teshuva Through An IDF Soldier’s Eyes
He said, just think about it: “You have the chance to say I’m sorry, I regret what I did, and I won’t do it again, and be forgiven — what a tremendous opportunity that is!” I had never really thought of repentance in this particular way…as an opportunity. Usually, it’s more of something that is uncomfortable, difficult, and that we really don’t want to have to do.
So with a few more days to go before Yom Kippur, let us thank G-d for the chance to make amends and do better in life, because this is an incredible opportunity and a true blessing, and one that we do not know will ever come again.
October 4, 2019
Celebrating With Security
Take a look around you at the new security measures and people risking their lives for yours and your family. Take a moment to thank them. But also, recognize that the security isn't there just for show, it's there because the hatred and threats have tangibly increased along with the ever present means to carry them out. It is critical that we continue our vigilance and the strengthening of our security measures, because those that hate us for who we are and for our faith are not going away, and unfortunately, they may even continue to grow in numbers and resolve. However, none of us should live in fear and be forced to stay away from our religious institutions, our Torah study, and prayer, but rather to the contrary, we need to stand up strongly--in defiance and in faith!
While I don't know what specific security measures we will see next Rosh Hashanah, I can say with almost absolute certainty that it will be more and not less and that you should definitely be taking notice.
(Image by Robert-Owen-Wahl from Pixabay)
October 2, 2019
Who's Fasting For Whom
Gedaliah had been appointed governor of Israel by the Babylonian conquers in 423 BCE. However, within the year, Gedaliah was assassinated. This resulted in the remaining Judeans fleeing to Egypt and the Babylonian exile being firmly established until the return from this exile in 371 BCE.
Literally for thousands of years the relatively small Israelite nation in the Holy Land was repeatedly attacked and conquered by the large surrounding empires of the Assyrians, Egyptians, Babylonians, Persians, Greeks, Romans.
Despite this punishing history, when it came to the Fast of Gedaliah, my father used to inject a little light humor and say:
Gedaliah didn't fast for me, so I am not going to fast for him.
I can still hear his words in my head and even now it still brings a warm smile to my face and happiness inside me.
Upcoming next week is Yom Kippur--fasting and atonement. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 1, 2019
The Founding Of Zionism
| Key Person | Year | Published Work | Main Idea |
| Avraham Mapu | 1853 | The Love of Zion | Longing of Jewish people for their ancestral homeland |
| Moses Hess | 1862 | Rome and Jerusalem | Europe's welcome to Jews is tenuous, and Jews should seek return to homeland |
| Leon Pinsker | 1882 | Auto-Emancipation | Jews are not accepted in European host countries, and are urged to seek national rebirth |
| Nathan Birnbaum | 1890 | Self-Emancipation | Coined the term Zionism referring to a movement to re-create a national Jewish home in Israel |
| Chaim Nachman Bialik | 1892 |
El Hatzipor (To The Bird)
|
Poem on longing for return to Zion |
| Chaim Nachman Bialik | 1898 | Mikra'ei Zion (Assemblies of Zion) | Poem of hope and expectation of return to Zion |
| Theodor Herzl | 1896 | The Jewish State | Jewish State will usher an end to rabid anti-Semitism everywhere |
| Theodor Herzl | 1897 | Launched Zionism as political movement and convened first Zionist Congress | |
| Theodor Herzl | 1902 | Altneuland | Envisions idyllic future Jewish state |
| Ze'ev Jabotinsky | 1923 | Samson Nazorei | Ideal of active, courageous, Jewish warrior |
I am reading the book Israel: "A Concise History of a Nation Reborn" by Daniel Gordis.
I've prepared this summary of the founding of Zionism, which I have briefly summarized above.
Hope this is helpful to those interested in the origins of the founding of the modern State of Israel.
(Credit Graphic: Andy Blumenthal)
September 29, 2019
Positively Jewish New Years
September 28, 2019
The Good Things In Life Are Challenging
"Everything truly pleasurable in life starts with considerable pain." More colloquially in working out, we usually say: “No pain, no gain!” And there really is a lot of truth to this. If you think about it, this concept really applies to everything meaningful and ultimately valuable in life.
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
September 27, 2019
That Decisive Qualitative Edge
It's basically about their elite genius program, "Talpiot," in the Israel Defense Forces (IDF).
Each year the program accepts only the top 50 out of 100,000 graduating high school students for a 9-year commitment.
There are the mathematicians, physicists, and computer scientists that help give the IDF the cutting edge in military R&D and other innovations.
These are the brain trust behind Israel's Iron Dome missile defense system and Trophy tank active protection system and many more both military and industrial advances.
This program was born after the almost disastrous 1973 Yom Kippur War where Israel misjudged the intelligence and the advances in their enemies capability and almost lost the war.
I like the philosophy of General Yitzhak Ben-Israel who understands the importance of challenging the status quo and looking differently at critical situations and avoiding confirmation bias:
My method is not to look for supporting evidence. I look for refuting evidence...you see one white swan, then a second, third, fourth, fifth, and sixth. You still can't conclude that all swans are white...nature builds us to be inductive, to make generalizations from past experience...this standard way of scientific thinking can be limiting and destructive."Instead we must be continuously curious, think outside the box, be creative, and innovate.
Especially, where we don't have a quantitative advantage like with Israel surrounded by many enemies, then we must rely on a very sharp qualitative edge. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
September 26, 2019
Beautiful Measurements
It dates back to 1852!
The weights range from 1 gram to 500 grams.
These are weights, but also a form of art.
It is located at the NIST Museum.
There is something comforting about weights, measures, and standards.
It puts an organized construct unto our universe and creates some objective scientific reality to our world.
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
September 25, 2019
The Magical Letters Of Tishrei
It is ingenious how the letters of the Aleph and Bet and Tishrei (the dates when Rosh Hashanah occurs) is exactly equivalent to the letters in the Hebrew word for Genesis (Bereshit), which is the event of creation that we celebrate on the Jewish New Year.
Truly, this magical genius evident in the Torah can only be from one source and that is the one Creator and Sustainer of the Universe, Himself!
Let me take this opportunity to wish everyone a truly magical Rosh Hashanah and one that is filled G-d’s mercy and blessings for a happy, healthy, prosperous, and peaceful New Year!
(Credit Graphic: Andy Blumenthal)
September 24, 2019
Magnificent Room Divider
The brilliant colors and the vibrant circular swirls make this outstanding to take in.
So simple in a way, yet it brings so much magnificence to any space.
Staring into this has an almost heavenly effect of traveling through that final tunnel before reaching the heavenly essence of light at the end of it all. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
September 23, 2019
Time To Mellow
This beautiful Japanese garden is way better to look at then the lies, denials, and cover-up that SAR and their public relations cronies are posting.
Anyway, tired of their bullsh*t and you should be too.
Enjoy the beautiful Japanese Garden.
Compliments of one of the prior child victims of SAR Academy.
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
September 22, 2019
Rambo Is Back
September 21, 2019
OFNR Communications Model
This is a useful 4-part communications process (developed by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg):
1. Observations: Tell the other person the behavior you observe from them that is making you uncomfortable.
When I Observe...
2. Feelings: Explain how the person's behavior makes you feel (happy, sad, angry, annoyed, excited, worried, scared, hurt, embarrassed, confused)
I feel...
3. Needs: Describe what you need from the other person (physiological, safety, social, esteem, self-actualization)
Because I need...
4. Requests: Ask them specifically what you'd like them to do.
Would you be willing to...It's a way to make your feelings and needs known and ask nicely what you'd like from others.
This provides a mechanism to give feedback and work with other people without being confrontational, threatening, dictatorial, or nasty.
When I see you reading my blog, I feel happy, because I need to try to be a good person and good influence in this world. Would you be willing to share my blog with others? ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal and Colleague from Work)
September 20, 2019
SAR -- Safe Haven For Sexual Abusers, Not For Kids
SAR ACADEMY: SAFE HAVEN FOR SEXUAL ABUSERS
SAR has had at least 5 alleged and/or convicted sexual abusers on their rolls or associated with them that we know about:
1. Stanley Rosenfeld (1970s-1980s)
2. Rabbi Sheldon Schwartz (1970s-2018)
3. Jane Doe, female staff member in High School (-2012)
4. Rabbi Jonathan Skolnick (2018-2019)
5. Plus the "Sauna Rabbi" from the Riverdale Jewish Center (~1986-2016)
In my opinion, SAR has become a safe haven for child sexual abusers as they have kept hiring the perverts. SAR is what they call an open school, and in their attempt to literally tear down the physical walls inside the school, they very likely have opened up the school to the child sexual abusers who use their openness physically, socially, and technically to enable and facilitate sexual abuse. Perhaps after all this, word is out on the street that SAR is the place for sexual abusers who go for easy access to students in an open school system with a history of lax enforcement. SAR has got to do a better job in its vetting process and in ongoing monitoring for inappropriate contact.
SAR'S NARCISSISTIC "RESPONSE" HANDLING AND AVOIDANCE OF RESPONSIBILITY
SAR's reaction has been heavily focused on the public relations to buttress themselves and in essence their very strategic messaging has been over and over that "they've done everything right," including from a Rabbi working for them for ~20-years who self-servingly said this just the other day for the Jewish Link NJ. However, from my perspective, the truth of the matter is that they have done virtually everything wrong.
From what I've seen and read, it's more like 90% of SAR's response has been about their "response." rather than on expressing any contrition or regret for what has happened under their watch, rather than on introspection for where they keep going wrong, rather than on working to fundamentally understand how they keep on hiring pervs and getting fooled for so long, and rather than genuinely strategizing on what they can do better to protect the children before it happens again. Is their policy and training working if the latest Skolnick incident happened just a few years after the prior incident in the high school and while they were still investigating the Rosenfeld/Schwartz one in the middle school? SAR's response that they have done everything right in responding and of course, patting themselves on the back is like a mortician praising themselves for a great job cleaning up the dead bodies that they themselves facilitated.
Further, why is everyone talking about SAR's response rather than prevention? And why is no one talking about the victims? For example, why is no one talking about the poor 14-old boy from SAR that was allegedly exploited by Skolnick or the other 20-25 victims? SAR is conveniently bringing in their own self-serving investigators and "experts" (supposedly one of these is alleged to have asked for leniency for the child abuser in a prior child sexual abuse case). It certainly seems like they are doing everything but holding themselves accountable for their mistakes of judgement and process. Further, 1) why are they not cleaning house of any additional abusers that are still hiding in their ranks, and 2) starting with their leadership holding Rabbi Krauss accountable for the errors that were made with Skolnick's hiring.
Moreover, rather than SAR taking responsibility, I've heard plenty of blaming the child victims from gaslighting pundits who in my opinion should absolutely have their licenses revoked. These reprehensible, morally vacant "child victim advocates" aren't holding the abusers accountable, but rather blaming the child victims with insane causative conclusions that it is because the children weren't empowered, assertive, or strong enough that's why they were sexually abused. Truly, this is the age-old fraud of telling the rape victim that it's her felt that she was brutally gang raped because she didn't yell loud enough or fight back. Make no mistake, a little child is not ever going to be assertive or strong enough to fight off a perverted grown adult who has been patiently planning and grooming their victims. In fact, that's why they call them children! It's highly unfortunate that these people don't see what it's like until perhaps G-d forbid they are the victims themselves. I hope G-d open's people eyes so that positive change can finally be made and children don't have to suffer anymore from this.
WHAT DOES THE FUTURE HOLD
From their response, it is clear to many that for SAR this is about their image and reputation and not truly about Jewish education and a safe learning environment. Unfortunately, as long as SAR is more focused on protecting the institution of SAR and their jobs, rather than on protecting the kids in creating a safe learning and true Torah environment then nothing will really change for the better or safety of these children.
September 19, 2019
Prepare to Survive!
Saw a great (and scary) video on RUN, HIDE, FIGHT (from http://www.readyhoustontx.gov) -- link to video is here.
Other take-a-ways:
- Always have a plan A, B, and C.
- If you can't run or hide, fight with everything at your disposal--engage and neutralize the shooter!
- Survive, you're not done until your done!
Please G-d, we should never have to deal with the horror of this, but it's good to learn to be always ready. ;-)
(Credit Photo: U.S. Marshal Service)
September 18, 2019
Aging Gracefully
Our bodies and minds may start to deteriorate.
We can't do all the same things we used to do (even as we can maybe do others).
There can be a deep sense of loss as abilities, things, places, and people that were critical to us for many, many years may no longer be present with us.
When I used to speak with my aging father about he and my mom getting older, he would joke and say:
Yes, we're getting older--what's the alternative?
Then the other day, I ran into a nurse from the Jewish Social Services Agency (JSSA).
We chatted briefly about the good work they do in helping so many elderly and handicapped people.
And then she says to me about how she herself is starting to feel what it's like to get older, and that she often tells her mom that everything hurts to which her mother responds:
You're not supposed to leave this world alive!
Putting these together:
I suppose we all need to do the best we can to age graciously ourselves as well as help others in the process--because there is no alternative to aging and no one leaves this world alive. ;-)
September 17, 2019
SAR -- A THIRD Round of Child Sexual Abuse Scandals
The Judaic Studies principal (grades 6-8), Rabbi Jonathan Skolnick has been arrested for "production of child pornography."
This after numerous child sexual abuse scandals in the Jewish community in Riverdale, and at SAR in particular!
- In the 1970s-80s: SAR employed TWICE now convicted sexual offender, Stanley Rosenfled who admitted to sexually molesting hundreds of boys throughout his life.
- Again in 2012, SAR was rocked by a sexual abuse case by a female staff member "allegedly engaged in sexual activity with a male sophomore."
- Now for a third time in 2019, SAR's 2018-2019 newly appointed Middle School Principal of Judaic Studies is arrested for production of child pornography and SAR's principal is stunned at how this could be happening: "It is shocking to know that someone who we have trusted with our children has been accused of harming them. Despite the practices in place to protect our children, we are not immune to breaches such as the one that seems to have taken place at SAR."
Clearly there is a PATTERN OF BAD BEHAVIOR AND NEGLIGENCE here (i.e. like a repeat offender) and at a certain point, the patience and excuses completely runs out!
This latest sexual abuse debacle with Rabbi Skolnick (where was the vetting process on hiring him?) occurring AT THE VERY SAME TIME that SAR was conducting and publishing the results of it's earlier sex scandal with convicted sexual offender Stanley Rosenfeld and SAR's statement in their October 5, 2018 message releasing their report that:
Continuing our conversations with our students and faculty on preventing and addressing sexual abuse. In 2014, SAR implemented an Anti-Harassment Policy:www.saracademy.org/antiharassmentpolicy. Training is done annually for all staff as well as appropriate training for high school and middle school students as part of their advisory program. Emphasis of the training is on awareness and reporting of any potential abuse as well as setting appropriate parameters for student-staff interactions. We are fully committed to the safety of our students and to continuing to implement best practices in these areas.
As anyone can see that the words by SAR are nothing but cheap and empty as demonstrated by the facts of their now THREE TIMES REPEATED sexual scandals as reported!
How SAR could be "shocked" after three times the same types of sexual abuse occurring under their watch should be a complete mystery to any reasonable, thinking human being with a soul.
Where is the outrage by the Riverdale community and by the current board of directors of SAR? And where is the REAL action by them to correct their now half century HISTORY of abuse against the children in their completely negligent care?
Of course, let us also not forget the other sexual scandal allegations in the same community at the Riverdale Jewish Center and the chorus of denials and lack of accountability that went on with their prior "Sauna Rabbi" of thirty years who finally stepped down in 2016.
Would the Riverdale community and SAR in particular like to offer up any new denials today and provide any more cheap words about their Anti-Harassment policy and phony "commitment to the safety of our students"?
Less than two-weeks before the Jewish New Year 5780, will SAR finally take RESPONSIBILITY for the abuse to their past students and REALLY do what it takes to protect its current and future children.
September 16, 2019
Sometimes You Just Want To Say...
Exactly what this ladies shirt says.
My father used to say when certain people were nasty to him, he would just be nice to them.
And when they would still be really nasty to him then imperceptibly, quietly under his breath, he would say "F*** You."
Ah, maybe not always so imperceptibly. LOL
Sure, we can't always just come out and say it like this lady does boldly on her shirt.
Maybe it doesn't help to use expletives, but sometimes some people can be such jerks that just saying it quietly is cathartic and truth-telling.
Perhaps more important, saying it let's you know that you still have a moral compass and personal integrity, even if others around you have seriously compromised on theirs. :-)
(Credit Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)
September 15, 2019
Ghosting - How Rude!
Invariably, it often turns out that there is someone else in that person's life.
The person is usually either too scared to confront the other person or is just a cheater and doesn't want to tell the other person, instead wanting to "have their Kate and Edith too." LOL
So "ghosting" is where the person just disappears, cuts off contact, or goes incommunicado.
It's sort of an avoidance strategy.
This leaves the other person not knowing what happened or why.
It's like the line just goes dead between the two people.
Sometimes, one person is clingy or forces themselves on another in which case, the other person may feel smothered, and therefore repels or wants to run in the other direction.
Other times, how do you tell someone that you just don't like them anymore?
Worse is if the person is cheating behind the other person's back, hiding it, and denying it--that's unforgivable!
When a person ghosts another, it's sort of like at work when someone get's marginalized.
No one wants to give honest feedback to the other person, so instead for some people it's just easier to avoid them and the topic altogether.
I think the point is not to hurt other people.
The question is how do you cut the strings with someone you don't like without getting into a huge, ugly confrontation?
Honesty is the best policy, and treating people the way you would want to be treated.
But for some people who don't take no for an answer, it's understandable that you may just want to have the phone on busy signal or you attempt to break contact.
Relationships are tough, and when they go bad, ghosting without at least trying to end it nicely can not only be rude, but also it's chicken to break it off as a ghost, and not a person. ;-)
(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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