Just a saying about inner strength that I liked:
You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."(Source Graphic: Andy Blumenthal)
Showing posts with label Tests. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tests. Show all posts
August 21, 2018
Be Strong!
Just a saying about inner strength that I liked:
August 20, 2018
When It Turns In
Depression is anxiety turned inward.
When people feel anxious and that they don't have control over their situation that make them feel in a sense helpless, and then the anxiety "has no where to go," it becomes depression.
I guess it make sense that if you feel that you can't really do anything to make things better--and no matter how hard you try--then you feel somewhat helpless/hopeless and get depressed
Perhaps it's almost like a frustration at your own inability to change things you feel you need to change.
That is why a person's feeling some sense of control over their environment and life is so important.
When things are looking down, it helps to try and do something to take back control over what feels like spiraling uncontrollable events and circumstances.
Of course, only G-d really has control over what ultimately happens.
But we need to do our part to try to make things better.
Just taking that first (and second and third) step is freeing.
I'm pretty sure that an element of this is that you can tell yourself that you "did everything you could" so in effect there is a lifting of guilt about the situation, but at the same time there is also a genuine feeling that you are here for a purpose and perhaps have made a difference in this world.
Some people feel big and important, but the reality is that we are all so small in a very big world and universe where suffering and loss can strike (G-d forbid) at any moment.
Man is but a speck of dust in the realm of things.
But at the same time, our speck is filled with a soul of the living G-d.
So we must do what we can to be a good influence and impact.
Whatever it is, it is what we can do.
If everyone--7.6 billion of us out there---does their part that can make a difference.
Don't let life's anxieties become your depression.
Look for what you can contribute--do it!--try your best to make a difference and make the world better.
It's what you're here for and what you can positively do. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
February 8, 2018
Adversity Is Not What You Think
This TEDx video is truly WOW!
Definitely worth watching in full.
So many takeaways from this that I want to remember.
- Three things can happen in life:
1. What you hope will happen
2. What you fear will happen
3. What actually happens
- There is not always a tomorrow!
Think if you were paralyzed from the neck down, what would you wish you had done differently, and go do it.
- See adversity as a gift:
1. It is harsh and ruthless.
2. It shows up unannounced.
3. It doesn't care what you want.
4. It doesn't give a darn how you feel.
5. It doesn't take no for an answer.
6. It hates your weakness.
7. It is your best teacher.
8. It is the most honest person you will ever encounter.
9. It forces you to up your game.
10. It knows your true potential even if you don't.
11. It offers you no other choice, so the choice is simple.
12. At the end of the day, we are only as strong as the adversity we overcome!
13. It will recede, but the lessons will always remain.
14. It will strengthen you to endure your next battle, stronger and wiser than before.
15. How we overcome adversity is by facing it head on. (If you try to avoid it, it can crush you; and if you try to go around it, you will never avoid it's grasp.)
My absolute congratulations and gratitude to Marcus Aurelius Anderson on this magnificent and brilliant talk and lessons for all of us!
And thank you Minna Blumenthal for sharing this wisdom with me!
February 5, 2018
Strong Coffee People
Two arms and a big "A" in the middle.
Need to remain strong despite whatever life throws at us.
So it's not just strong coffee or biceps!
But rather strong character, integrity, spirit, and faith that's really important.
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal with compliments to the artist)
October 24, 2017
G-d Holds All The Keys
Whatever happens, happens.
And G-d is the master over it all.
He holds all the keys.
G-d opens doors.
When we are being challenged, look toward the Heavens.
There is a door there somewhere.
What can ANY man do to us?
When G-d reigns over ALL men.
In G-d, there is salvation and mercy.
G-d will watch over His people.
And He will bless them in peace! ;-)
(Source Graphic: Andy Blumenthal)
October 18, 2017
Character Building Day
A friend told me that when they have a really tough day, they call it:
"A Character Building Day!"
I thought that was pretty astute.
When people are up against the wall...
And they feel like they practically have their hands and legs tied...
And the world is spinning around them out of control...
And others are throwing tomatoes, darts, arrows, and all types of other sh*t their way...
- We can either just close our eyes, feel powerless, get upset and depressed, and basically give up
OR
- We can see the tough times as challenges--however great--to build our character.
Every situation is a learning and growth opportunity.
Don't give in--Get up and fight.
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger!
Yes, many days are character building days--it doesn't always feel good--often it feels horrible--but we can approach it with the right attitude and help shape our character and soul for the better. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
September 5, 2017
The Meaning Of Pain
I spoke with her this evening and she has grown into such a smart, mature, and good person.
We were talking about some hard times.
And she said to me so smartly (and I am so proud of her):
"The reason that we have pain is to avoid more pain."
Wow...think about that for a moment.
Everyone gets physical, emotional, and even spiritual pain in their lives.
Even little things like stubbing your toe, getting a small burn, or a paper cut--these things give you a instant or more of pain...but it jolts you into attention of what to avoid and to action how to protect yourself to prevent further and worse pain down the road.
A little pain now can fortunately save you a lot of pain later!
(Or in the gym they say, "No pain, no gain.")
My father used to say about difficult life lessons:
"Better to cry now than to cry later!"
He was right--bad situations generally don't get better with age.
Continuing the discussion with my lovely daughter tonight, she said to me:
"A person becomes better when they struggle. I've become better by struggling."
Again, like little pains, even larger struggles in life challenge us to learn, grow, and become better and stronger people.
I remember as a kid--when we went through those growth spurts--it would actually hurt a little--some muscle aches here and some cramps there--whew, a few inches taller already.
Growth hurts, but it's kind of a good hurt that only someone with the emotional intelligence to understand maturity and betterment can really grasp.
No, I'm not advocating for self-flagellation--just that we know when pain and struggle is a defining moment in life--like shaping and sharpening a great sword in fierce fire.
It's hot, but the heat is healing and necessary sometimes to grow as human and spiritual beings. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
August 27, 2017
That's Lucky
They had all these cat symbols hung inside.
I asked the owner what it said, and she told me:
"Lucky Cat"
Why a cat symbolizes luck I don't really know.
But the bigger question is whether there is any such thing as luck in the first place.
We constantly wish people good luck on any and every aspect of their lives: from birth to bar/bat mitzvahs, engagements, weddings, graduations, new jobs, journeys, and basically anything we embark on.
That's what Mazel Tov means--good luck!
But I thought we believe in G-d and not luck?
We strive through prayer, charity, repentance, and all sort of good deeds to try and move the scale of justice in our favor.
With the Jewish high holidays approaching next month--Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur--we do everything to atone for our sins and commit to being better in the future.
We seek G-d's mercy and his blessings.
There is no arbitrary luck or fortune.
Life is what we make out of it.
What about the Massachusetts women who won $758 million in Powerball last week or the person that gets cancer or some other horrible tragedy--did they deserve it?
I suppose it's impossible for us to judge why some people have amazing fortune and others have schlimazel (misfortune).
As it says in Genesis (18:25):
"Shall not the judge of all the Earth do justly?"
Surely, G-d has the bigger picture and the omniscience to know what is good for us and what is not.
How he tests us and tries us and to what ends...that is a matter of faith and conviction--and we believe that it is all ultimately for our best.
The judge of all Earth...please have mercy on us and bestow your blessings on us, your faithful children.
As to the lucky cat--wave us some good vibes--all long as we realize that we all need G-d's grace! ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
August 26, 2017
Look Down To Feel Up
Whoever I talk to has something bad and fairly serious to complain about, and there seems to be new things coming all the time.
Just today, I heard from one person who went to the dentist with a tooth pain only to discover it had been silently infected for over a year, and was so serious that it literally could've killed him.
Another person told be about having a child with special needs and moving to an area with a school that could more effectively deal and help them.
And a third person told me how they lost their husband many years ago at the age of just 39-years old and being left a widow.
But people make the best of it!
They have to.
I remember my father saying when my mother got so sick with Parkinson's Disease:
"We are part of the survivors club."
It wasn't easy to see her endless suffering while he selflessly tried to help her day-in and -out and cope with the physical and emotional pain of it all.
When I was younger my dad would teach me about not feeling bad whatever the situation, and to always be grateful for what you have, and he told the story:
"There was a poor man who had no shoes, and he felt very bad...that is, until he saw someone else who had no feet."
It doesn't take much for things to get really bad in life...sometimes it can seem like we're literally just holding on by a thin thread.
But as G-d tests us and teaches us, we need to try to look on the bright side and be grateful that things aren't worse....and yes, they can even get better again. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
August 10, 2017
Face The Fear
She said something to me the other day that was really profound and had a deep impact on me.
Something bad had happened and honestly, it was a truly frightening situation.
At first, it seemed like one of those negative surprises in life that brings bad news and you are at first sort of shocked.
As things progress though and the news unfortunately doesn't get better, but in fact gets worse, the shock turns to fear and maybe even panic.
Oh shit, what do I do now?
Turn this way..no good.
Turn that way...no good.
Retreat...not an option.
So I speak to my wife, and at first she says:
"Just look away."But I can't look away...I can't ignore a problem...my instinct is that I have to plan for it, deal with it, solve it.
I go back to my wife, and she says to me:
"Face the fear, and walk through it."And I had to stop in my tracks at that.
She was right--there is no use being fearful or worrying--I would face it and walk through it, and come out the other side better for it.
That was some of the best advice anyone I think has ever given to me.
Got to be strong, have courage, face the challenges in life, and "walk through it!"
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
Have to have emunah (faith), and realize it's just a test.
And the Almighty G-d is my shield and protector.
It's a test, but I can pass it with G-d's help, and everything will be alright. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
June 29, 2017
It's Not (Always) Easy
But there is definitely another reality out there, and that is that everyone has problems:
- Family
- Health
- Finances
- Work
- School
- Conflict
- Spiritual
Like Helen Keller said:
"I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet."
I remember as a child, if I felt sad about something, my dad at times would remind me about the children in the hospital, and to think about how we can help others less fortunate--and he was right!
What I see in life is a lot of people trying, but also so many challenges, failures, and suffering along the way...unfortunately, it's part of the learning and growth equation, and in why we're here.
In college, I always remember one (English) professor who taught me from Henry David Thoreau:
"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation."
Sometimes, in our solitude or when we speak quietly from our heart with our closest loved ones, we feel and express some of those deep feelings of hurt, pain, and suffering from our lives.
Those experiences, memories, and feelings are not all that there is of us, but it is certainly a part of all of us--although maybe only the brave will admit theirs.
It's not shameful to feel, to cry, and to be human.
It's certainly not what Facebook and Twitter are all about.
But it's a genuine and critical part of us which recognizes as my dad also taught me that--life is not easy--and that we have to fight every day to do our best and to help others to do theirs. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
May 16, 2017
Going Down B4 You Go Up
And they told me this interesting, wonderful, and faithful perspective.
"Sometimes you go down before you go up!"
Like the Wheel of Life (Gilgal Hachozer), what goes down, thank G-d can and does tend to go back up--it's a return to the mean and then some.
When you realize that challenges and even hardships are part of the cycle, and that these test and grow you and your ability to overcome, then you can face them knowing that you can rise up and hopefully to another level of maturation and happiness.
Yes, know that nothing is easy in life!
Often we take a step back to take two forward or a step down to boost ourselves further up.
It's the nature of progress.
Don't be afraid to go down a little right before you're about to go way on up. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
April 5, 2017
The Key Is Calm
We feel...
- Angst
- Anger
- Upset
- Frustrated
- Murderous at times
We even question, "Why me?"
But none of this helps.
In fact, it just makes things worse.
Because we compound our life challenges with more problems in how we react!
What should we do instead?
The key is to remain calm, cool, collected, and composed.
Don't get rattled, disjointed, and out of whack over anything or anybody.
These are all tests in life.
They are all fleeting.
G-d is watching us and seeing if we have faith in him.
When you remember the creator and sustainer of all life then you can rise above the adversity before you.
Go beyond the superficial.
Experience the world beyond the earthly bounds of time and space.
See the larger picture.
Breath deeply...a sigh of relief.
There is nothing to be upset about that G-d can't make right for you.
Face the challenges with a clear head, a brave heart, and follow your conscience.
Act with determination to speak out and right the wrongs you encounter.
Remember, you are one with G-d and the universe, and all will be for the good. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
March 7, 2017
Is Man An Angel Or Beast?
On one hand, we see small and great acts of love, kindness and generosity.
People feeding the hungry, housing the homeless, donating clothes to the poverty-stricken, and standing up to defend those that are abused, discriminated against, and victimized.
Every day is an opportunity to be a gracious, heavenly angel!
At the same time, we are witness to horrible acts of hate, cruelty and inhumanity.
The strong preying off and committing gross acts of violence against the weak, the rich elitists taking from the poor lower-class, the powerful violating the human rights of the masses and ruling with a brutal iron fist.
Every day is the possibility to act the vicious, lowly beast!
It's a choice as we stand here teetering on the world we are injected into.
The angel and the beast fight within us.
Our souls yearn to emulate the spirit of our Holy Creator, while our bodies look for raw physical and material satisfaction.
It is truly a battle that rages within us, and can tear any or all of us apart.
Yet, our mission is for good to overcome evil--in everyday small and large ways.
To fight the urges that torment us and to rise, rise, with the wings of an angel to reach our potential and fulfill our destiny. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
December 3, 2016
Dysfunction Is The Starting Point
He connected to this week's reading from Genesis in the Torah.
It was a commentary about our forefathers and mothers and what the stories in the Bible teach us.
As we know, these people while righteous and holy, were not perfect people or families.
Thinking about these, some examples that come to mind about the many tests, challenges, and tragedies in their lives:
- Adam and Eve eating the forbidden apple in the Garden of Eden
- Noah getting drunk and his son, Ham, seeing his nakedness and telling his brothers
- Abraham and Sarah's doubting (i.e. laughing) that G-d would give them a child
- Isaac lying to Avimelech about Rivkah being his sister (similar to what Abraham said about Sarah)
- Jacob buying the birthright and stealing the blessing from Esau
- Shimon and Levi killing the people of Shechem for Hamor raping their sister
- Joseph's brothers being jealous of him and throwing him in the pit and selling him into slavery
- Judah sleeping with Tamer, the wife of his firstborn
And so on.
Rabbi Ovadia said we should keep 4 things in mind about the Biblical figures and families to learn for our own:
1) Context - There is a context to what we do. We all have histories that involve difficulties, challenges, illness, abuse, PTSD, and so on. The things we do and how we react later in life are anchored in this context.
2) Dysfunction - Every family (and I would add person, organization, and institution) is dysfunctional. There is no perfection out there (except G-d). Functional would mean like a computer, we input-process-output towards a certain function. However, as people, we are not automatons, but instead work out our dysfunction through our striving to love, have relationships, learn and grow.
3) Responsibility - Whatever our challenges and dysfunctions, we are responsible for what we do--our actions. We can't just blame history or others. Our role is to face up to our lot in life and take responsibility for what we do. It our life and circumstances to make or break us.
4) Communication - In dealing with life and it's challenges, communication is key to dealing with things. I would argue that communication is just a part of many critical success factors like trust, determination, hard work, emotional intelligence, being giving, integrity, etc. But certainly, communication is a key aspect in how we work out our issues with others and try to build function from inherent dysfunction.
The honestly of the Bible in telling us the flaws of it's heroes and heroines--our ancestors--is one of the things that make it such a source of wisdom for us as well as demonstrating the truthfulness of it being G-d given to us.
The bible doesn't sugarcoat who we are and what we have to deal with--it is the Book of G-d that is a roadmap for us to learn from and do good with in our own lives. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
November 7, 2016
We All Have It In Us
We all like to think of ourselves as possible superheroes.
Whether we dress the role or not, the most important thing is acting it.
Every day, we face circumstances and decisions and we have to decide whether we rise up to the occasion as the superhero or we acquiesce to what's easy or lucrative and do the villain thing.
From the time we are kids, we glorify the superheros not just for the awesome cool powers they have, but for doing something amazing to help people and the world with it.
Somewhere from being a kid to a grown-up, many people end up letting go of that superhero dream as they face the harsh realities of life everyday.
But deep down inside all of us is that superhero!
Good over evil is not just a story for children's bedtime or imagination, but it is our battle to be fought and won--that's what a good life is for those that never lose their fundamental beliefs. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
October 24, 2016
Greatest Danger Is Still Man
This was the long awaited episode to see what happens after Rick and cohorts are captured and literally put down on their knees in the gravel by the evil and ruthless Negan and his army.
The killings of Glenn and Abraham by getting their skulls brutally bashed in was one of the most horrific things I have ever seen.
And forcing Rick to nearly cut off his own child's arm and all the other mental torture and physical abuse he endured left the show's leader and hero, a completely broken man.
All that they had overcome and survived was now just a shattered history.
They were overcome, they were defeated, they were wholly broken.
What is amazing is that they could handle the Walking Dead zombies (even hordes of them), but ultimately, it was the evilness of man himself that they could not win against.
Zombies are dangerous and scary, but man is the most dangerous and brutal predator out there, and the horrific things they can do to each makes everything else pale by comparison.
Especially, when Negan kills and destroys, he does it with such completele evil joy that it leaves one questioning, how can this whole evil thing exist in a universe created and maintained by a good and merciful G-d.
My wife said to me that this was a small reminder of what the Holocaust must've been like--with the Nazi's holding a stranglehold of power and committing the most heinous atrocities and genocide against 6 million starving and enslaved Jews held in notorious concentration death camps.
After the show, watching "Talking Dead," viewers indicated that this was the turning point in the whole show, and there was no going back for Rick and his group.
Yet, I am most certain that even if it can no longer be Rick who regains his strength and leadership mantle, there will be another who will rise up and overcome the evil Negan.
It's a dog eat dog world, and there is always another younger, leaner, and meaner dog in town--hence, every dog has it's day.
Ultimately is that justice?
While perhaps we all wish to see good triumph over evil every time, there are certainly moments when good takes a good walloping.
And then G-d sends a savior to restore good to it's rightful dominant place in the universe.
In the process though, lives and souls can be shattered and never be the same again.
Watching the eternal battle between good and evil is what totally tests our faith and gives us the free choice on which side to be on. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
August 30, 2016
(Not) Too Hard!
They are what we call "good people."
But like all of us, have challenges and difficulties in life.
Maybe their load is heavier and more taxing.
But it is what G-d has given them to bear and to work with.
In talking with this person, at one point, they said, "It's too hard!"
And I think we all feel that way sometimes.
Bret Stephens quoted Bernard Lewis in the Wall Street Journal today, that in trying times, some ask, "Who did this to us?" While others ask, "What did we do wrong?"
Maybe the question should be, "What can we do now?"
While some throw in the towel and can't go on or go on in a bad way, others may get angry and bitter at their lot in life.
But yet like my inspiration, Rocky, some get up and fight for what they want.
The down is only a temporary down, but not a knockout.
The pain stings and hurts and leaves us blurry-eyed and dizzy, but our desire to succeed pushes the adrenaline through our coursing veins, and we get up again with even a greater determination.
"The eye of the tiger, the thrill of the fight, rising up to the challenges of our rivals..."
I take responsibility. I take accountability. I want to overcome.
I shall prevail in life and even ultimately in death, my life will mean something to somebody.
The end is the beginning again. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
June 16, 2016
Setbacks Lead To Comebacks
My wife, Danielle Blumenthal, sent me this beautiful quote from Joel Osteen's book called, "It's Your time."
"For every setback, G-d has prearranged a comeback.
For every failure, G-d has prearranged mercy.
For every disappointment, G-d has prearranged restoration.
For every unfair thing, G-d has prearranged vindication....
It's easy to get discouraged, lose your enthusiasm, or even be tempted to just settle where you are.
But if we're going to see G-d's best, when you get knocked down, you don't stay down. You get back up again.You have to know that every time adversity comes against you, it's a setup for a comeback."
Often we look at some people, and think that they have everything.
But no one does--life is a bunch of trade-offs.
Some are blessed with family and friends, others with health and longevity, and still others with peace or prosperity, but no one has it all.
And if you think they do, then you don't really know them and their circumstances.
In life, everyone has weaknesses, setbacks and failures...it's how we learn, it's how we grow.
Understanding that setbacks doesn't necessarily mean "game over" and that as long as there is life, there is hope, can give us the courage to go on, and the strength to get up when it seems like we are down for the count, and to make a comeback to live and thrive yet another day. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
April 22, 2016
Attitudinal Fix
For some people, the glass is half full, and for others it's half empty--it's of course, just how you look at it.
One colleague told me this week:
"Life is 10% what happens
and
90% how you react to it."
and
90% how you react to it."
I suppose we see that with so many people who have unbelievable daunting challenges in life, yet somehow they manage to put on a smile or give a thumbs up regardless, and just do what they need to do--they are troopers, survivors, and generally people of incredible character and caliber.
These are the heroes that we can look up to.
"When the going gets tough, the tough get going!"--and the going refers to doing what needs to get done, and not running away from your duty scared or not knowing what to do.
Need to be courageous, resourceful, loyal, and giving to others.
Stop the whining, the crying, the self pity, the questioning "why me"--what will any of that help?
Fight, fight, fight--that's what we're here for.
Until our last breath, we can still make a difference. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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