June 26, 2017
Shock Value Gets The Ball Rolling
When you do or say something that is S~H~O~C~K~I~N~G.
And it jolts the other person out of their daily stupor so that they really take notice.
It's hard to stand out in a global population of over 7.2 billion people and counting.
Everyone wants to be special, unique, have an impact, and make a difference.
It's our answer (partially) for why we are here and why it matters.
Our life is a journey and it can be a log slog if we don't have a purpose and meaning in it all.
We look to the One Above for guidance, meaning, love, and protection.
But we also have to look at ourselves in the mirror...what are we doing with our lives.
Shock value doesn't mean real value...it's just the initial jolt to get noticed...like that purple and green spiked hair or those sparkly shoes you adorned.
So you have to take the initial jolt and make it into deep impact--by touching not just a cord, but the nerves that run through.
In Florida, there was a funny sign along the highway with that shock value that said something like this:
"Your Wife Is Hot So Call {X} To Fix Your A/C!"
What did you say about my wife?
You know you're right, I do need to invest in better air conditioning! ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
June 20, 2017
Winning Attitude
One of the awesome brand stores was running a sale with 70% off!
Check, check--not a gimmick--we race over with the crowd already forming lined up outside the doors.
This salesperson was there to guide just a few people in at a time--I guess, so the mob wouldn't rip the joint to sale shreds!
This lady (pictured) had something awesome about her.
Working part time in retail, I'd imagine that it's not the job's salary and benefits that is perking her up or "getting her out of bed in the morning."
Yet, she had the most unbelievably great attitude.
She stopped to talk with us and tell us about her background studying and living in Israel during the year, and that she had a twin sister working in the same store for the Summer.
Her energy and enthusiasm was inspirational and I would imagine could even be contagious to many who let themselves revel in it rather than resist it.
As people waited on the line, this women offered them her umbrella to stay dry and cool.
Waiting on line is not the most fun thing, even when it's for a 70% off sale, but this lady kept everyone smiling and sort of stress free with frequent updates and walking and talking up/down the line.
Listen, we all know people who do the same or similar jobs: one is grouchy, sullen, and is for all intensive purposes miserable all or most of the time; the other is generally smiling and happy to be there learning and contributing, and have the job.
What a difference between these 2 types of people!
And what a enormous contrast between the positive and negative impacts they have on others and on the organization.
It's not just what you say and do, but how you go about doing it.
Yes, we all have various challenges and problems in our lives, but how do you deal with it.
This doesn't mean you should be a phony baloney head--you need to be genuine and real to be credible and a high-functioning human being--and of course, everyone has bad days.
But an overall winning attitude goes a long way in life and towards success--for yourself and how you can influence others. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
Winning Attitude
June 11, 2017
The Cloud Pays Off
Bloomberg has an interesting article on how Adobe is growing their revenue by billions switching their apps to to the cloud.
Instead of customers paying a one time purchase price for Creative Suite or Acrobat, now customers must pay for Creative Cloud or Document Cloud subscription fees that may sound small in the beginning, but really add up over time.
And more than that, Adobe doesn't have to worry about wowing customers with the next upgrade in order to get them to make another purchase, because as long as their products are competitive, the customers will keep paying their subscriptions fees money month after money month.
What's better than making a sale to a customer? Selling to them in a cloud subscription model that keeps paying and paying and paying.
No wonder it's better to have your head and technology in the cloud--it's a true rainmaker! ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
The Cloud Pays Off
May 19, 2017
Going Bonkers For Pink
Going Bonkers For Pink
March 16, 2017
Sexuality Sells Sometimes
As you can see, the center mannequin is set up sitting in not a very modest way for a lady.
And worse, there is a little boy mannequin situated right next to her.
It was funny to see people stop to look at this fake sexual scene.
But no amount of sexuality could sell the junk that the store was pushing.
So strutting your stuff or showing a little skin--or in this case hard plastic--may get the customer's attention or even in the store.
However, it certainly doesn't close the deal, although something else here would be better off shut or as my mother-in-law says, "close your yap!" ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
Sexuality Sells Sometimes
December 18, 2016
Survey The Performance
Afterwards, I got an email asking:
"How was your experience with Beverly?
When I opened this my wife saw this and was like, "What the heck is that?!"
We should be surveying the work performance and not the experience with the person.
I can't imagine that super smart Apple didn't see this sort of double entendre about sweet Beverly.
All Apple needed to do was add in the word(s) at the top, shopping and/or at Apple, as in "How was your shopping experience with Beverly at Apple? (rather than burying it in the subtext later)"
But then their customer satisfaction survey maybe wouldn't get as much attention.
Sexualizing the customer experience shouldn't be part of marketing, unless maybe your purposely visiting a shady part of town for unscrupulous reasons.
Anyway, I did respond that Beverly was a definite 5!
Thank you for the wonderful technology Apple and for the experience with Beverly--it was great! ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
Survey The Performance
April 15, 2016
Versioning Gone Wild
However, many vendors have gone out of control with versioning.
1) Incompatibility--It isn't backward compatible, so if you try to work with an older version file/data, you may be sh*t of out of luck getting it to work.
2) Alphabet-Numerical Soup--We have so many versions of the same/similar thing, we can make your head spin with buyer envy.
3) Functionally Indistinct--Version changes are so minute or insignificant that there is virtually no difference to the end-user, but you'll love it anyway.
4) Long And Meaningless--Some versions just seem to go on and on into the weeds...like version 2.10.3.97--ah, let's compare that to the new version of the week of 2.10.3.98, and don't forget the 2.10.4 will be a completely different platform, so you better remember to order the right one.
5) Upgrade Pathless--You want to be on the current version, well your version is so legacy and ancient, there's no (easy) upgrade path--you have to install 26 patches, hot fixes, and 9 new versions and then you'll be on the right one!
6) Maintaining Multiple Versions--You'll need to maintain multiple versions of the same product, because your data on the older version can't be migrated to the new one. Can anyone say multiple maintenance fees?
7) Out Of Support--Your older version that you spent a lot of money on is no longer current and is now out of support--so scr*w you unless you pay us again for the next money maker version.
If you want to kill your brand and possibly your customers' sanity, keep on going mindless version crazy. ;-)
(Source Graphic: Andy Blumenthal)
Versioning Gone Wild
February 26, 2016
A Winning Letter
People are competing to get their "foot in the door" and at the same time not get the "door in the face" to do business and of course make money--it's called capitalism and "it's the American way!"
Most of the time, managers don't have time to respond to all the calls they get.
But this week, I received the most brilliant introductory letter from a 26-year old in technology services.
I think it's important to share from this, because it's really the best I ever received from anyone looking to make a contact.
First, the letter is handwritten, which right away made it more personal and so got my attention in the first place to even read it.
Second, the person mentions some things that they know and like about me--demonstrating that they did their homework and was also subtly ingratiating about it, but not seemingly in a b.s. or over the top way.
Third, the person shows flexibility to any venue to get an opportunity to touch base (along with a sense of humor throughout), "over lunch, coffee, water, a warm glass of milk, etc."
Fourth, the specifics of what he's looking for..."I want to ensure I stay ahead of the curve. I am thinking you can provide some great knowledge." Elaborating later in his letter, he says, "what keeps you up at night, what will keep you up tomorrow and how will you overcome it."
Fifth, he tries to make it a win-win for a meeting and says what he can bring to the table..."Well, I can tell funny stories from my weekend, my budget to buy a Tesla one day or my engagements with other gov't agencies. You pick!"
Sixth, he provides a form of disclosure with a sense of trustworthiness saying, "I am in sales. However that is not my objective with you so I promise not to sell sh*t."
Seventh, he works to connect to me personally again by referencing a funny blog I wrote about ties, and he says, "I promise not to wear a tie--I hate them too."
Eighth, he frames this cold call as completely casual, offering again to "steal some time...[or] if not I understand."
Ninth, leaving it open to get back with him, he writes, "Feel free to email, call, tweet, or carrier pigeon me."
Tenth, he wishes me well, "Take care Andy", and he signs it and includes his business card.
My reaction is that this is either a young and brilliant salesperson seeking legitimately to network, learn, and make some possible future opportunity inroads unknown.
OR
Of course, if I think more from a operational security (OpSec) and security awareness training perspective, I could be concerned about some smart "social engineering" going on here, but that wasn't the feeling I got from this.
My gut thinks this is one highly motivated and intelligent young man creatively getting into his profession, and I must say, it was impressively done. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
A Winning Letter
November 3, 2015
A Pushy B*tch/B*stard
However, pushy doesn't just get your foot crushed in the door, but typically backfires as a means of convincing anyone of anything.
If someone says no, as a recent sexual abuse poster said, then the answer is no--an unwanted advance is not wanted, period--get it?
You can't push yourself into bed with someone non-consensually, and you can't successfully push a product or service or idea unto others who just really aren't sold--eventually they will push it right back in your hostile, pushy face.
It's one thing to make a sound argument if/when another person is willing to hear you out, and it's another to push, push, push, and just not take a hint--not interested!
On the show, The Last Kingdom, this past week, the English priest was trying to convince the violent Danish Viking to convert to Christianity--the priest thought that it was working as he continued to work the Viking over, until suddenly, the viking stands up and thrusts a sword through the priest.
Pushiness over!
If you can make a poignant argument for something and influence things for the better by all means try, but if you are just going to act the pushy b*tch, then be ready for the fallout from a non-receptive and eventually hostile audience. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
A Pushy B*tch/B*stard
July 19, 2015
That's Good Cookin'
This guy is standing on the corner dancing around in his apron and chef's hat.
He's also got a big fat fake mustache on top of his real one and big round glasses/googles on his face.
He is working hard to attract people to come into his restaurant.
This "chef" calls over to us jumping around--doing anything to get our attention.
So we had already eaten lunch, but he did get us to stop and say hello--this picture captures the moment. ;-)
(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)
That's Good Cookin'
July 16, 2015
B&N Chairs Are The Pits
They are so uncomfortable--many people seem to rather sprawl out on the floor to browse the magazines and books, rather then get a butt bender in those darn chairs.
Some other people that I've seen now have resorted to placing cushy stuffed animals on the chairs to ease the discomfit on the arse!
I took this picture of someone's chair by the window with 2 stuffed animals left over after what must've been a much needed cushion liner on the the bare wood.
[BTW, sorry for whoever buys those sat on, smelled on stuffed animals afterwards--ew!]
The question is why invite people in to browse and sit--if you are only going to make them so uncomfortable.
Ok, I get the implicit message, "You can read for a few minutes, but otherwise buy something or get the h*ck out!"
And not that they are wrong (they aren't), but why resort to making people physically uncomfortable and forcing them to leave instead of making everything welcoming and encouraging shopping and sales.
Barnes and Nobles--a nice place to visit for 20 minutes as long as you have some stuffed animals for your butt--but Amazon will reign bookstore supreme. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
B&N Chairs Are The Pits
October 8, 2014
"Shitty" Advertising
I stop in a restaurant to use the restroom.
Now, I know sometimes people put art inside to sort of spiffy the place up.
But in this (semi-fancy) restaurant's restroom, there was actually advertising--yes, right where you do your thing.
And in one spot, they had this sign from Insite Advertising, Inc. for the bathroom advertisements.
"...Thank you for allowing us to spend this time alone with you. We understand that during your hectic day quiet moments are few and far between..."
Well, this was one alone time that was definitely interrupted and a little less quiet.
Isn't there any place we can go anymore without being bombarded by branding, marketing, advertising, selling, and companies trying to make a another quick buck.
Darn, leave us alone and give us our bathrooms back--I'm not buying from you at a time like this! ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
"Shitty" Advertising
August 16, 2014
Technology Easy Sell
We examine the costs and the benefits, and it either works and provides us a tangible competitive benefit or it doesn't.
"You can't be competitive without modern technology, you'll simply be out of business."
At the end of the day, you don't want to be sold a worthless bag of goods from a no good (not genuine) salesperson.
Read about it here in my new article in Public CIO.
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
Technology Easy Sell
March 27, 2014
10 Keys To Influencing And Selling Anything
Brilliant video by Kendra Eash for McSweeney's Internet Tendency.
It is made entirely with stock footage from Dissolve.
What is amazing is how with some great video, nice background music, and a soothing confidant voiceover--we can sell, or be sold on, just about anything.
The 10 Keys to influencing and selling anything, including B.S.:
1. Vague words that show progress (innovation, hope, motherhod, and apple pie--I'll have some of that)
2. Beautiful footage and sound (who wouldn't want to be there type?)
3. High-technology and science (we can solve the world's problems and make money, yippee)
4. Research and development (we're investing in the future and you should invest in us)
5. Global and U.S. (we're beyond borders, but still "made in...", headquartered, or otherwise a U.S. entity)
6. Environmentally conscious (clean water, breathable, air, lush forests, who can argue with that?)
7. High-speed (movers and shakers, we don't stand still, join us or be left behind)
8. Attractive people (this is for real human beings, human kind, we care about you!)
9. Diversity and equality (we love and help everyone--including you and your family)
10. Inspiring (we're thinking big and bringing positive change--buy from us, support our cause)
Throw/superimpose any company, product, country, person, or cause on this video--and poof, you've got an awesome brand--whether you deserve it or not!
This is how we're manipulated one brand at a time, hundreds of brands a day. ;-)
10 Keys To Influencing And Selling Anything
December 10, 2012
I'm Looking At You Looking At Me Looking At You
The EyeSee Mannequin has a camera built into its eye that watches you while you shop.
According to Bloomberg BusinessWeek (6 December 2012), the EyeSee Mannequin sells for about $5,130 and it conducts consumer profiling--using technology to identify criminals--it determines your age, gender, and race and tracks your shopping patterns.
Newer versions of EyeSee will likely have a sensor for hearing you as well, so it can "eavesdrop on what shoppers say about the mannequin's attire."
Next to these mannequins, you have to consider who are the real dummies, when everything you do and say can be monitored.
Next time, you're peering at that mannequin, be careful, it may be peering right back at you--and when it says something be ready to jump. ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
I'm Looking At You Looking At Me Looking At You
August 19, 2011
Supercookies Are Super Invasive
You're alone sitting at the computer surfing the web, you're looking up health, financial, entertainment, shopping, and other personal things.
Supercookies Are Super Invasive
June 15, 2011
Apple Store "Heaven"
Apple Store "Heaven"
May 1, 2011
Social Networking the Pepsi Way
It's a touch screen, networked machine that aside from enabling the purchase of soft drinks and the provision of nutrition information online, it also enables users to "gift" a drink to a friend by entering the recipient's name, mobile number, and a personalized text message (and even has an option to personalize it with a short recorded video).
The recipient of the Pepsi gift simply enters the redeem code at a pepsi social vending machine to get their soda. They can also return a thank you gift to the sender or "pay it forward" and give a gift to someone else.
In addition, the machine makes use of advanced telemetry to remotely measure and report on inventory, manage delivery scheduling, and update content on the machines. This machine is alive with changeable content and interactive communication between users.
As the Chief Innovation Officer of PepsiCo Foodservice states: "Social vending extends our consumers' social networks beyond the confines of their own devices and transforms a static, transaction-oriented experience into something fun and exciting they'll want to return to, again and again."
Additionally, Mashable reports that in phase 2, Pepsi is planning to integrate their Social Vending concept with other social media such as Facebook, extending the reach of product placement and gifting even further through cyberspace and social networking.
While many companies continue to struggle to figure out how to integrate social networking into a companies operations and make it profitable, PepsiCo has a simple formula for how it engages it's customers, promotes sales, and makes it all seem completely natural to the whole transaction--like it belonged there all along.
Great job PepsiCo!
Social Networking the Pepsi Way
October 24, 2010
Pain Points, More Potent Than Wish Lists
Organizations are all interested in what sells—what’s hot and what’s not!
Of course, as advertisers learned long ago, “sex sells.”
What else? Fear sells. All the basic emotions seem to sell—everything from affection and anger to wonder and worry.
When people experience an emotional drive, their internal (biochemical) and external (environmental) states elicit a psychophysiological response that drives mood and motivation.
The result is that when effectively selling to people’s emotions, we address or meet their explicit or implicit “pain points.”
Fast Company (November 2010) has an interesting article called “The Felt Need” that differentiates wants from genuine needs.
A want is one thing, but a genuine need or “pain point” is something entirely different. Getting something we want may be satisfying a nice to have on our wish list, but getting rid of a pain point is something that we literally crave to fulfill from physiological and/or psychological motivations.
A good analogy to satisfying people’s wants versus needs is that it’s better to be selling aspirins than vitamins, because “vitamins are nice; they’re healthy [and people want to live healthier]. But aspirin cures your pain…it’s a must-have.”
Similarly, the article tells us that just building a better mousetrap, doesn’t mean that customers will be beating down your door to do business, but rather as organizations we need to figure out not just how to build a better mousetrap, but rather how to get rid of that pesky mouse. The nuance is important!
In technology, there is a tendency to treat almost every new technology as a want and almost every new want as a need. The result is vast sums spent on IT purchases that are unopened or unused that perhaps looked good on paper (as a proposal), but never truly met the organizational threshold as a must-have with a commensurate commitment by it to succeed.
There are a number of implications for IT leaders:
1) As service providers, I think we need to differentiate with our internal customers what their genuine pain points are that must get prioritized from what their technology wish list items that can be addressed in the future, strategy alignment and resources permitting.
2) From a customer standpoint, I’d like to see our technology vendors trying to sell less new mousetraps and focusing more on what we really need in our organizations. The worst vendor calls/presentations are the ones that just try to tell you what they have to sell, rather than finding out what you need and how they can answer that call in a genuine way.
In looking at the emotion, the key to long-term sales success is not to take advantage of the customer in need, but rather to be their partner in meeting those needs and making the pain go away.
Pain Points, More Potent Than Wish Lists
May 1, 2008
“Glocalization” and Enterprise Architecture
Glocal is a combination of the words global and local. It is a best practice in business where organizations conducts business operations globally, but tailor their offerings to meet local tastes and needs.
Essentially doing business glocally means that you are architecting your business to perform operations both effectively and efficiently—i.e. your business is doing the right thing by growing without geopolitical constraints and you’re doing it the right way, by being sensitive to the customers’ specific needs wherever they are located.
The Wall Street Journal, 1 May 2008, reports that “Kraft became the No. 1 biscuit maker in China by tailoring the Oreo to local tastes.”
“The Oreo has long been the top-selling cookie in the U.S. Market. But Kraft Foods, Inc. had to reinvent the Oreo to make it sell well in the world’s most populous nation.”
“Unlike its iconic American counterpart, the Oreo sold in China is frequently long, thin, four-layered and coated in chocolate. But both kinds of cookies have one thing in common: They are now best sellers.”
40% of Kraft’s revenue is internationally-based, so their strategy to go glocal is critical to improving their market share and profitability.
To increase growth at Kraft, the CEO “has been putting more power in the hands of Kraft’s various business units around the globe, telling employees that decisions about Kraft products shouldn’t all be made by the people at the Northfield, Ill. headquarters.”
Similarly, to market the Chinese Oreo’s, one of innovative things Kraft did was to have Chinese university students ride around on bicycles outfitted with wheel covers resembling Oreos and handing out cookies.
The CEO stated this was “a stroke of genius that only could have come from local managers. The more opportunity our local managers have to deal with local conditions will be a source of competitive advantage for us.”
Glocalization, the customization to local markets, is far removed from the original Ford Model T (the most influential car of the twentieth century according to Wikipedia) set in 1908 that was based on standardization and assembly-line production, rather than individually hand-crafted.
From an enterprise architecture perspective, going glocal and customizing (or tailoring) business products and services to local tastes is also quite the opposite of what most enterprise architects try to do, which is to standardize their products and services to increase interoperability, simplify the infrastructure and operations, and achieve cost-efficiencies.
So what is more important, standardization or customization?
I suppose it depends on your perspective. If you’re in operations, then standardization is the dominant factor in order to streamline business processes and achieve cost-efficiencies. However, if you’re in sales and marketing, then customization is key to market penetration and customer satisfaction.
This leads me to the role of the enterprise architect, which is to balance the conflicting needs of the organization and simultaneously drive standardization in business processes and technologies, but customization to local requirements for sales and marketing. So EA serves Oreos to everyone!
“Glocalization” and Enterprise Architecture