Better Than A Cadaver

So I'm at the doctor's office for a checkup.

The doctor tells me to lie down on the exam table. 

There is also a 3rd year medical student in the room as part of her training. 

The exam starts and there are all these devices for checking things out. 

It's feeling a little tense. 

I jokingly say, "I feel like a cadaver lying here (being studied)."

Then the medical student says, "Oh you smell much better than a cadaver! I just took that class."

Oh, how comforting is that--smelling better than a stinkin' dead person whose been embalmed!

At which point, there is some ridiculous talk about dead people and formaldehyde, body odor, and decay.

This was quite a lively visit, but I hope it was helpful to me and to medical science. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Better Than A Cadaver

Are We Ready For Anything?

So contingency planning is a critical part of risk management.

You never know what can happen in life...

So you must have a solid business continuity plan (BCP) and disaster recovery plan (DRP). 

That way in case of natural disaster or terror attack--we are prepared!

So what was really sad-funny this week was when I became aware of an annual contingency planning exercise that was being conducted as a table-top exercise--that's legit. 

It was well-planned, scripted to really challenge the participants, and I heard it went very well.

But then just that evening as it turned out there was a real contingency.

What happened?

Everyone was working well to address what happened and how to fix it and kudos to some super great people. 

The only problem was no one seemed to really know or was following what to do from a contingency plan perspective.

In the end everything turned out fine, but it was incredible how planning and training can deviate so far from real life. 

It's like in school, when administrators conduct fire drills for the teachers and students and everyone gets up like good boys and girls and goes out in an orderly fashion, maybe even in a nice buddy system, but then when G-d forbid there is a real fire, everyone starts screaming and running crazed for the exits. 

Perhaps table top exercises should be thrown out the window and testing should be conducted with realistic scenarios and under mandated lifelike circumstances. 

Instead of smoke and mirror planning, we need serious preparation for the day when it isn't child's play or cool drawings on the whiteboard only. ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution to Sharyn Morrow)

Are We Ready For Anything?

Trader Joe's Is Growing On Me

I took this photo in Trader Joe's.

I like how organized (and colorful) they are.

A binder for everything...dairy, produce, bread, cereal, meat, cheese, snacks, cookies and candy, frozen goods, beverages, and flowers, , 

Another binder for training...nice, they care about their employees.

And even for donations--another sign proudly stated that the store had donated $925,000 of goods so far this year...that's pretty amazing!

I previously wrote about 10 Reasons To Love Trader Joe's (and 2 to not), but this store is continuing to grow on me. 

Especially with all the healthy eating you can do from there--that's probably the most important reason of all to shop there. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Trader Joe's Is Growing On Me

My Alter Fighting Ego

"His who life was a million to one shot."

He fought, he survived, and he triumphed.  

Go Rocky, Rambo, Sylvester Stallone. 

Human rights, social justice, good over evil. 

And never again! :-)

(Source Photo: here via Facebook)

My Alter Fighting Ego

Andy Blumenthal With Roberta Grossman

What an honor today to be able to take this photo with Roberta Grossman, movie Producer/Director. 

First we saw her upcoming movie "Above and Beyond."

It is the story about the birth of the Israeli Air Force, and it was co-produced with Nancy Spielberg (Yes, the sister of Director Steven Spielberg). 

In 1948 when the U.N. (under G-d's guidance) established the State of Israel, the Arab nations prepared to attack the fledgling nation state.

Just 3 years after the end of Holocaust, the surrounded Jewish people with inferior arms, faced almost certain devastating defeat in their War of Independence. 

However, brave volunteer pilots from America, Canada, and South Africa answered the call to help their brethren in Israel. 

With ingenuity, some smuggled air planes, brief training by Czechoslovakia, and the blessings of Hashem, the Israel Defense Forces stopped the advancing Arab armies--of Egypt, Syria, Transjordan, Lebanon, and Iraq--in their tracks. 

It is an amazing story of courage and heroism, and Ms. Grossman did a wonderful job answering enthusiastic questions from the audience in Virginia today. 

Kol Hakavod on a excellent film--thank you!  ;-)

Andy Blumenthal With Roberta Grossman

What Type Of IT Error Was That?

So true story...

One of my collegues was giving me a status on an IT problem in the office. 

With a very straight face, he goes, "Yeah, it was an I.D. 10 T error!"

I'm just looking at him with a sort of blank face (I must have been emanating something like, "What are you talking about Willis?")

And he repeats, "An I.D. 10 T error...uh?"

Ok, one more time, I haven't had my coffee yet.

So he goes dotting his head, "What you haven't heard about an I.D. 10 T error?"

"All right, you got me...What is an I.D. 10 T error."

And as I'm saying it out loud and visioning it on paper, his little joke is out of the box.

Hey cut me some slack, I'm a Jewish kid from the Bronx and so I innocently say, "An IDIOT Error?"

Now he's nodding his head up and down in excitement, "An end user--IDIOT--error!"

And he starts laughing his head off. 

Ok boys and girls in IT...rule #16 of office etiquette, please don't call the end-users, idiots.

Back to customer service (and sensitivity) training for some of the jokesters on the team... ;-)
(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

What Type Of IT Error Was That?

Overqualified And Underwhelming

Ok, so this sign is sarcastic for the question I received the other day.

A colleague, who is a supervisor, asked me :

"How do you take a group that doesn't know how to do the work (literally does not know how) and get them going, then teach them to do it on their own instead of doing nothing, waiting, blaming?"

My response was:

You can't do everyone's job for them...you will fail that way (and they will fail that way). 

You have to learn to work effectively with others...you have to delegate and let them do their jobs. 

As a manager, you should review, edit, comment, question, suggest, recommend, and quality assure (not micromanage).

Send staff to training, mentor, and guide them, but don't do the job for them. 

What do you think?

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Overqualified And Underwhelming

How NOT To Interview For A Job

So I am at this place of business this evening, and I overhear someone trying to apply for a job.

Note, I feel bad for the guy who is looking for extra work, but the interview just is going all wrong. 

- Easy-Smeasy - He asks "What is the easiest part of the job?" Ugh, didn't sound exactly like he was looking for a challenge.

- Keep your head down - He exclaims, "And never do someone's else's job!" What about helping where the help is needed?

- Great facilities you got here - He ends with, "And when I work here, my kids are really going to love coming to use the facilities here all the time!" Not exactly, a what will I do for you strong ending. 

I didn't get to hear the whole interview dialogue, but this was enough to get the idea about some things not to do in an interview. 

The funny/sad thing was, I think this gentleman really thought that he was going to get the job after all. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

How NOT To Interview For A Job

Hey Abrham!

Thanks Starbucks for writing Abrham on my breakfast purchase this morning. 

Apparently, religious sterotypes are alive and well with you. 

How about a little sensitivity training for your staff or do you guess biblical names for all your customers?

Don't worry though, it turns out that is my Hebrew name (and I'm Jewish and proud of it), although it's spelled like this: Avraham. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Hey Abrham!

Leadership Training, Where?

Rapid Learning Institute (RLI) has toilet training for leaders.

No, not toilet training, but T.O.I.L.E.T. training:

Time
Optimized
Intensive 
Learning
Experience
Technology

People are short on time for training, so this combines productive training with some downtime that "every worker engages in."

The kiosk incorporates an "eye-level WIFI-enabled tablet" which launches 6-10 minute rapid learning modules. 

This is a lot better than the Reader's Digest moment of yesteryear. 

So don't be fooled by the toilet in the video, this is rapid learning in quick chunks on important leadership topics such as employee engagement, communications, performance management, and more. 

The funny video is a neat advertising mechanism to drive the point home. ;-)

Leadership Training, Where?

10 Ways To Improve Federal Technology

While it's good to improve government services through advances in information technology, we also need to do better with what we have, which is our own valuable IT human capital. 

In the Wall Street Journal today, the "health-site woes" are spurring a push for changes to federal technology, including the possibility of a "federal unit dedicated to big tech projects." 

Whether or not we carve our a separate big tech project unit, we can do so much to improve success in all our agencies by valuing our people and motivating them to succeed.

As democracy and capitalism have taught us, we need people to be free to innovate and reward them appropriately.

While the grass may look greener in Silicon Valley, our challenge is to utilize all our resources in whatever part of the country they reside, whether they be government or private sector workers.

Ultimately, like most things, this is a human challenge, and not just a technology issue. 

Hence, I developed the above comic strip to demonstrate 10 Ways to Improve Federal Technology, so we can all succeed together. ;-)

(Source Cartoon [click here to enlarge]: Andy Blumenthal)

10 Ways To Improve Federal Technology

Sweet Sweat, Bitter Blood

General George S. Patton had a saying that "The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war."

And while we shouldn't sweat the small and unimportant stuff in life, we also can't afford to overlook those things that are really important like our health, spiritual well-being, modest prosperity to care for ourselves and loved ones, and of course ensuring freedom and justice for all people. 

It's a balancing act to do everything and it takes hard work to try and be successful on so many fronts of life.  

Some success strategies:

- Be aware of what's going on around you--we live in a dynamic world and things are constantly changing.

- Work hard to always have a positive impact--it's too easy to be negative and cynical, give up trying, and throw in the towel.

- Learn from mistakes--everyone makes them.

- Hope for the best, but also train and prepare for the worst--because you never really know. 

Overall, I think the picture above says it well: It's better to sweat in training, than bleed in battle. 

So listen to the General: sweat now--really work it and don't be afraid to push your limits--you'll be glad you did, when the time comes and it really counts. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Sweet Sweat, Bitter Blood

Genuine Artificial Gold

When I was a youngster going to summer camp, a great guy, "The Chief" lifeguard, used to tempt the kids to behave by offering them a prize of some "genuine artificial gold." 

Here are some thought provoking sayings from a cybersecurity class I took recently (you decide whether these are true for your organization):

- Organizational Power: "He who controls the budget, billets, and IT controls the organization."

- Micromanagement: "There is no greater enabler of micromanagement than information technology [and a crappy manager]."

- Getting to a Decision: "A non-decision is a decision."

- Managing Performance: "An organization is not well-suited to collecting data about itself."

- Mission and Personal Focus: "If you try to be everything to everybody, you end up being nothing to nobody."

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Genuine Artificial Gold

Academic Assignments In Hate

According to the New York Times (12 April 2013) a high school English teacher in Albany, New York on Monday asked students to write a persuasive essay on why Jews are evil and the source of our problems. 

The assignment stated: "You do not have a choice in your position: you must argue that Jews are evil, and...convince me of your loyalty to the Third Reich!"

This assignment echoed a similar assignment given to students in Georgia and New York City earlier this year instructing students to calculate math problems by using number of slave whippings and killings. 

Yes, these school assignments--to our children--are shocking and appalling. 

Although they call these teachers giving these assignments, these are not real educators, but rather bigots given a classroom pulpit.

Marguerite Vanden Wyngaard, the school district superintendent, said: "Obviously, we have a severe lack of judgement and a horrible level of insensitivity."

But this "apology" does not go far enough--in fact, there is no apology--just excuses and calls for sensitivity training. 

Wyngaard should've called this behavior for what it is--discrimination, anti-Semitism, bigotry, and hatred, and announced the firing of the teacher--who shouldn't be teaching anyone, anything!

With the Holocaust Remembrance Day this past Monday, April 8--this teacher added insult to injury in making such an assignment.

While teaching students how to write persuasively and argue different points of view can mean that sometimes you have to argue "the other side"; it crosses the line to assign students to write about why a whole race of people are evil, and on top of it to force them all to take that position.

According to CNews, a third of the students stood up and refused to complete the assignment--thankfully, there are some good and decent people left in this world.

Excuses are not apologies. Sensitivity training is not removal of a hateful bigot. And this school superintendent should've had the ethical backbone and courage to join the students who stood against this wrong. 

These "teachers" and school superintendent have at least six million reasons to do better, much better.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Academic Assignments In Hate

Don't Underestimate The Stress of Change

Regularly in IT, we field new technologies and systems.

Often, we don't pay enough attention to the details of change management and what that means to our users. 

A great article in Government Executive Magazine by Dr. Victoria Grady really hits this right on. 

Grady points out something that is often overlooked: people have an instinctual predisposition to attach to/lean on objects and intangibles--including things like office spaces, systems, business processes, organizational structures, leaderships styles, and so on. 

If you take that away--excuse the simile, but it is like taking candy away from a baby--you are going to get a lot of (often understandable) whining, crying, and resistance.

The key is understand that people in a sense really all have a kid inside them, and they need to be listened to, understood, empathized with, and cared for. 

Changing out IT systems, restructuring the office, or doing a reorganization (as much as they may be needed) can cause people huge amounts of stress and the organization productivity losses, if not done right. 

Remember, you are changing up people's status quo, what they know, their security blanket, and you need to be mindful of and implement a robust communication and change management strategy. 

What I have found is that one thing that raises the stress tempo is when people don't have enough information on the change that is coming, how that impacts them, and how "everything will be okay."

The more unknowns, the more stress. 

While you cannot share information you don't yet have or perhaps that is not yet baked, you can be honest and tell people what you do know, what you are still investigating, perhaps what some of the options are, timeframes, and of course, solicit their input. 

To the extent that people are kept in the loop and can influence the process--the more control they have--the better they can cope and adjust. 

Not that adults are children, but the analogy still holds, when you take away a bottle from a infant, you better have a pacifier to keep them happy--in this case, the pacifier is the replacement thing that people need to attach to/lean on to feel secure in their jobs. 

If you are changing out systems, make sure the new system is well vetted, tested, and trained with the end-users, so they know and feel comfortable with the change--and they have the confidence in you and your team, the new system, and in themselves to handle it. 

Same goes for other changes in the organization--you can mitigate stress through communication, collaboration, testing, training, and other confidence building measures. 

Adults and babies are a lot happier and better able to deal with change, when they are taken care of properly.

We are all somewhat change adverse and that is a basic survival instinct, so we sometimes need to take baby steps, walk before we run, and work together to change as a group and ensure that the "new" is indeed better than the "old."  ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Don't Underestimate The Stress of Change

Difficult Employees x 7

So I was learning about some management best practices in terms of there being 7 major types of difficult employees:

1. Challengers--employees that are oppositional; they resent authority, are disrespectful and confrontational. 
2. Clingers--people who are overly dependent; they are uncertain about what to do, fearful of making a mistake, withhold their opinions and may harbor deep resentments.
3. Drama Queens/Kings--these folks crave attention; they can be found spreading gossip and rumors and making dramatic pronouncements both professional and personal.
4. Loners--people who like to be left alone; they tend to hover over their computers and avoid personal interactions. 
5. Power Grabbers--staff that tend to get into power struggles with their boss; they ignore instructions and resist direction. 
6. Slackers--those who don't do the work they are supposed to do; they tend to linger on break, calls, or the Internet or be out of the office altogether.
7. Space Cadets--employees whose minds and discussion always seem to be in la-la-land; they tend to be off topic and impractical. 

Obviously, each presents a unique set of management challenges, but one of the most important things a manager can do is focus on specific behaviors and the impact of those on the quality/quantity of work and on the organization, and work with the employee whether through coaching, counseling, mentoring, or training on how to improve their performance. 

It should never be about the manager and the employee, but rather about the results and the outcomes. Keep it objective, be empathetic, document the issues, and work in earnest with the person to improve (where possible). 

Difficult employees are not evil characters (or villains) like in the James Bond movies, but rather humans being that need inspiration, collaboration, guidance, feedback, and occasionally when appropriate, a change in venue--where a square peg can fit in a square hole. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Difficult Employees x 7

Searching For Cybersecurity Warriors

For those interested in the field of cybersecurity, I wanted to share some useful websites that I've come across: 

1) Cybersecurity Training and Competitions

Cyber Aces--provides cyber training and competitions for high school and college students, including:

- Cyber Foundations: For high school students, you can visit the online Cyber Centers and learn the fundamentals of cybersecurity, including modules in networking, operating systems, and systems administration and then take cyber quizzes to compete for honors, awards, scholarships, and even corporate internships. 

- Cyber Quests: For college students, you can take "cyber quests" or online competitions associated with the U.S. Cyber Challenge, to demonstrate knowledge of infrastructure security, digital forensics, vulnerability analysis, packet capture analysis, and more. Winners can get an invitation to Cyber Camps for specialized advanced training. 

2) Information Assurance Scholarships

The Department of Defense has a generous Information Assurance scholarship program where recipients generally work as a full-time DoD employee for one year for each year of scholarship received. 

Similarly, the National Science Foundation offers scholarship where recipients work for a federal agency in the Federal Cyber Service (Cyber Corps) upon graduation. 

These are some amazing training and scholarship opportunities to ready the next generation of cybersecurity professionals. 

In a 2012 movie that I was watching recently called "Abducted," the main character tells the others with whom she is being held hostage that they need to fight their way out, and she exhorts them to have "No fear, no excuses, just results"--this is what we need in cybersecurity today! ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Searching For Cybersecurity Warriors

Catching More Flies With Honey

There's an old saying that you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. 

And this is true in cyberspace as well...

Like a honey pot that attracts cyber criminals, organizations are now hiring "ethical hackers" to teach employees a lesson, before the bad guys teach them the hard way. 

The Wall Street Journal (27 March 2013) reports that ethical hackers lure employees to click on potentially dangerous email links and websites, get them to provide physical access to data centers and work site computers, or give up passwords or other compromising information through social engineering.

The point of this is not to make people feel stupid when they fall for the hack--although they probably do--but rather to show the dangers out there in cyberspace and to impress on them to be more careful in the future. 

One ethical hacker company sends an email with a Turkish Angora cat (code-named Dr. Zaius) promising more feline photos if people just click on the link. After sending this to 2 million unsuspecting recipients, 48% actually fell for the trick and ended up with a stern warning coming up on their screen from the cyber security folks. 

Another dupe is to send an faux email seemingly from the CEO or another colleague so that they feel safe, but with a unsafe web link, and see how many fall for it. 

While I think it is good to play devil's advocate and teach employees by letting them make mistakes in a safe way--I do not think that the people should be named or reported as to who feel for it--it should be a private learning experience, not a shameful one!

The best part of the article was the ending from a cyber security expert at BT Group who said that rather than "waste" money on awareness training, we should be building systems that don't let users choose weak passwords and doesn't care what links they click--they are protected!

I think this is a really interesting notion--not that we can ever assume that any system is ever 100% secure or that situational awareness and being careful should ever be taken for granted, but rather that we need to build a safer cyberspace--where every misstep or mistake doesn't cost you dearly in terms of compromised systems and privacy. ;-)

(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)

Catching More Flies With Honey

If I Could Do School All Over Again

This program at Draper University of Heroes was written up in Bloomberg BusinessWeek (25 Feb. 2013) as The Silicon Valley Survival School. 

But really this is the remaking of education by venture capitalist, Tim Draper. 

There is an awesome focus on building thinkers, dreamers, inventors, and entrepreneurs--not just some more liberal arts majors without an real idea of how to apply what they learned or "what they want to be when they grow up."

The skills taught get you out of your comfort zone, break your fears, teach you life survival skills, and give you a core business foundation to hopefully, create the next great thing. 

Draper uses the terms superheroes, creativity, and imagination--skills so often overlooked in the traditional classroom where dated topics are not applied to real life, stale modes of teaching keep people in their seats and snoozing, and memorization is valued more than real critical analysis and innovative thinking. 

I am excited here by a curriculum that focuses on the big picture areas of vision, truth & justice, and creativity, and has lectures with CEOs of successful companies along side practical training in martial arts, survival, SWAT, first aid, lie detection, yoga, art and design, speed reading, cooking and more. 

This 8-week crash course teaches you how to come up with great ideas, start and finance a business, network, brand and sell, and classes are limited to 180 students, and the cost is $7,500 or 2% of your income for the next 10 years. 

The capstone is a 2-minute pitch to a panel of real investors, and the chance for Draper Fisher Jurvetson to make an actual investment in it. 

Investing in good ideas is one thing...investing in great people with the skills to succeed is even better.

I'd like to see this program expand to true University and even high-school level proportions--so we can really teach kids rather than just imprison them in mind and body. ;-)

If I Could Do School All Over Again

Zombie Homeland Security Training 101

Unbelievable. The Halo Counter-terrorism Summit (Oct 29-Nov. 2, 2012) is hosting a mock Zombie Invasion as part of its emergency response training for about a 1,000 special ops, military, police, medical, firefighter, and other homeland security professionals. 

The Zombie Apocalypse training exercise is occurring mid-summit on October 31, Halloween--so it is quite timely for other ghoulish activities that day. 

There are two sessions--#1 at 4:30 PM and #2 at 7:00 PM.

Both the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) and the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) of The Department of Homeland Security (DHS) have posted the CDC's Zombie Preparedness guidance--saying that "if you are generally well equipped to deal with a zombie apocalypse you will be prepared for a hurricane, pandemic, earthquake, or terrorist attack."

I guess this is very good news with Hurricane Sandy or "Frakenstorm" bearing down on the East Coast this evening.  Zombies, you ain't got nothing on Frakenstorm! 

In Yahoo News, Brad Barker, the President of Halo Corp., explained why Zombies are good for training, especially in asymmetric warfare: "No one knows what zombies will do in our scenario, but quite frankly no one knows what a terrorist will do."

Barker also jested that "No doubt when a zombie apocalypse occurs, it's going to be a federal incident, so we're making it happen."

Frankly, I love to see this type of creativity brought to national and homeland security and believe that this makes it less likely that we'll be perpetually fighting yesterday's war, instead of tomorrow's. 

The key is that we think out of the box in terms of what will the adversary do next--from cyberwar to weapons of mass destruction, we can't afford to be blindsighted. 

So do I think that aliens or zombies are coming for us some day--let's just say, never say never. ;-)

Zombie Homeland Security Training 101