Someone I Know And Didn't Know

So this is a true story...

I am on the crowded metro coming home from the office, sitting facing backward and toward the middle of the car. 

There is some noise and rustling coming up from behind me, and I see people's heads turning and startled looks on their faces. 

I turn around to see what is going on...

Someone in a wheelchair is screaming to get off the train. 

However, he is caught about halfway in between the closing metro doors, and can't get back in or out and off the train. 

There is one guy who was apparently standing by the doors, and he is trying to get the door open, but can't budge it.

Everyone else on this busy train seems just frozen, almost as if time had stopped (really). 

But the double train doors are wedged into the larger and smaller wheels (for hand turning) on the side of the wheelchair. 

The person in the chair is still calling out for help and to be released from the clasp of these heavy doors around him--in his seated position, his lower torso from his thighs down are positioned outside the train, but his upper body is still on the train. 

The conductor is trying to move the train again and again...and it's not apparent whether the failsafe mechanism for the open door will work as the train is lurching forward and the doors are sort of vibrating in this quick open/close fashion. 

Then, I see someone spontaneously jump out of their seat.

They are racing to the wheelchair jammed in the doors.

I see them first try and push open on the left side...but it's still not budging.

Then, they try and pull the other, right side, open towards them...but it's to no avail as the forceful doors are wedged in on around the chair. 

With everything around them a blur of seats and faces, the person turns their head looking around for another way...

They see like a target standing out in the distance, an emergency intercom on the front wall of the train.

The person lunges toward it and hits the round button.

The conductor who is still fidgeting with the doors to get them closed and trying to move the train ever forward comes hastily on the speaker, but apparently not connecting the call to him with what's going on with the doors and wheelchair says "Yeah, what's the emergency?"

The person catching himself, musters the words to say into the comm device, "There is a wheelchair stuck in the train doors-- OPEN THE DOORS!"

The conductor immediately reacts and the doors pull apart from both sides, and the wheelchair almost falls forward, the disabled person sort of thrown from the train, but finally on the platform, and wheeling themselves as quickly as they can towards the elevator to get away from this whole situation. 

With nothing left to do, the person who helped, let's out a deep breath and is visibly shaken, but also glad to see the person in the wheelchair safe and on their way. 

As he is walking back to his seat, he realizes there are a lot of eyes on him that were just a blur before. 

At the same time, over the speaker system comes the relieved voice of the conductor with a simple "Thank you."

I see the person sit down, calling his wife to tell her what happened, he starts to silently cry. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Someone I Know And Didn't Know

Understanding Disability

So true story...

There is a wonderful lady in the workplace...one of the nicest people. 

Unfortuantely, she has a disability and it is not easy...at times, she expresses to me the pain and the challenges, but always she maintains the best attitude and is an inspiration to everyone here. 

Not to compare, because thank G-d, I have been so blessed, but with the hip replacement and various complications, I have come to better understand physical pain and difficult mobility. 

Sometimes, as people do, we ask, "Why?"--and often we just come to the refrain that "G-d must have his reasons"--to teach us and to grow us in some way. 

Well, in speaking with this lovely women, she must have heard me really listening and understanding or seen my empathy with her, because at one point, she starts nodding and goes almost with surprise, "You really do understand."

Then she adds something about it being so odd for a manager to understand these things. 

I was so humbled by what she said, but more important. I felt a light bulb go on over my head. 

Why does G-d give us the challenges we face in life (physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, etc.)?

Because it helps us to truly understand and emphasize with other human beings...to be compassionate, caring, and giving (not self absorbed, narcissist, and me-me-me!)

In a sense, only by knowing the pain and suffering of others (or some elements of it--"Been there," "Experienced it," "I Know where you're coming from!"), can we substantially make that ultimate human and spiritual connection.

No, I am not saying we all have to be in horrible pain and misfortune--G-d forbid--just that the reasons for pain and suffering in life is not completely a mystery. 

My father used to say, "If we didn't have suffering, we wouldn't know or appreciate how good we have it the rest of the time." 

But it's also that we won't know or understand the challenges our neighbors, friends, and colleagues have--and adequately care for and about them.

G-d in his infinite wisdom has his ways to teach us--it should be with ultimate mercy, in good health and peace, and not pain and suffering--but when we oursleves are challenged, doesn't it open our eyes to see others and the world in a whole new and "better" way? ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Understanding Disability

People That We Meet Each Day

This piece of art sort of reminded me of the Sesame Street song "People In Your Neighborhood."

So, who are the people in your neighborhood?
The people that you meet each day.

We meet and interact with all types of people...funny and nice to mean and scary. 

Sometimes, you can see it on their faces--or especially in their eyes--who they are and what are their intentions. 

Other times, looks can be grossly deceiving, and we really have no clue who or what we are dealing with--psychopath or good samaritan.

Lately, as I meet or pass people, I see them on two distinct levels:

One is the physcial body they are in...their outward manifestation...the shell or outer casing that houses "them."

Two is the soul or G-dly spirit on the inside...the real them...the part that lived before and will live on even after the outside body is long gone. 

Our bodies are just housings for our souls...some people have physical disabilities, almost like a car that has broken parts over time...but what is inside perceives the greater reality and in a sense is both facilitated through and limited by our bodies--whether whole or broken. 

Sometimes, I feel like I am just looking right through the person and am really seeing their inner essence soul. 

Looks are just outside...inside is the real people we meet each day. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

People That We Meet Each Day

Touch Free, Just Use Your Head

Israel Innovation News is reporting a very simple but cool new technology for the disabled.

It enables them to "read, play games, search the web, and make calls without the need for touch."

Sesame Reader, from the Google App Store, "tracks your face and allows you to turn [eReader] pages with the movement of your head."

You can also dial a number or type of a keyboard by using movement of the head to control the cursor movement and by hovering over a button to "click it."

This helps people to function in a digital world, when otherwise they couldn't.

Hence, the name Sesame from Ali Baba's magic phrase "Open Sesame."

Now people can read, write, and interact with others online--even when they don't have use of their limbs because of neurological, muscular, and other structural defect, or if they simply want hands-free use.

Touchscreens, keyboards, and keypads are now accessible to anyone with the simple turn of the head--up, down, left, and right is all all it takes to navigate, touchless. ;-)

Touch Free, Just Use Your Head

Rock The House

Alright, this Jewish kid from the Bronx is not the biggest club guy.

But, we had a special event at the Light Club in Vegas and it was pretty awesome. 

The Great: the lights, dancers, special effects, and overall venue at the Mandalay.

The Okay:  Prefer an even higher tempo and energy from the music for more of the time. 

One amazing human element that I saw at The Light was someone in a wheelchair on the dance floor surrounded by his friends, all having a good time. 

Overall, I am finding Vegas better than what they advertise...guys, for almost $10B in gambling revenue, you can certainly find a better marketing and branding firm.

As DC is to politics, Vegas is to entertainment, but DC gets all the news coverage (more often bad than good), and Vegas needs something more than Sin City. ;-)

(Source Video: Andy Blumenthal)

Rock The House

Prosthesis Anyone?

This was a picture I took from the office of an orthopedic surgeon. 

The surgeon is listed as a top doctor in Washingtonian Magazine. 

Next to the medications, bandages, and splints was this statue of a sailor with a wooden leg. 

I suppose the message is clear--if only he had a good orthopedic surgeon, he could have a modern functional prosthetic instead of this old wooden leg. 

Well, thank G-d for modern medicine, and hopefully it will only get better and better with time. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Prosthesis Anyone?

From The Window In the Nursing Home

I visit the nursing home pretty often to see my mom who is there. 

While I try to focus on my mom and her needs, I do notice other patients there. 

The images are deeply impactful on me...here are ten that are on my mind today:

1) The husband and wife who are both in the home in a shared room--the wife is wheelchair-bound and the husband dutifully pushes her around the floor. This weekend, I saw them together at the nurses' station asking for some crackers. When the nurse came back with some individually wrapped crackers in cellophane, the couple took them and went off down the hall happy as clams.

2) The lady at the table who is overweight, but always asks for more food. She doesn't talk much except to ask for more dessert. She stares at the other patients and seems annoyed and upset with them.

3) The guy who was a lawyer, but now has dementia, and sits and talks half to himself and half trying to engage others, but all that comes out is sort of gibberish. So others just nod or say something to politely acknowledge him, but can't converse with him with any meaning. 

4) The lady in the room who sits in a chair hunchback. She never seems to leave the room or the chair. Sometimes, she watches TV and other times appear to be crocheting. Mostly she sits hunchback, looking uncomfortable, but settled for the long hall like that. 

5) The woman who sits outside her door in the hallway. She is in a wheelchair, and she doesn't say anything, but she stares at you while you walk down the hallway. She sits there watching--sitting and watching. 

6) The younger but still old disheveled guy. He comes into the dining room to eat, but gets food all over himself. He sits alone, always. He eats quickly, leaves half his food, and gets up and goes out while everyone else is still picking away at their food. 

7) The lady with a wall of baseball caps. She has no hair, maybe she has cancer, I don't know. She usually is in bed, sitting up. The caps look like they have a lot of meaning to her, but I'm not sure if it's because she's a sports enthusiast or why.

8) A lady in a wheelchair that pulls herself along down the hall. She puts one foot in front of the other in these baby steps motions, and the chair moves along, slowly, but at least she is mobile, somewhat. 

9) This weekend, I looked out the window of the home, and there was a woman on the sidewalk. She had fallen on the ground, on her butt. Her walker was next to her, but she could not get up. Some people were near here, apparently trying to get help, but not wanting to touch or move her themselves. I ran for the floor nurse, and she came to the window to see. She said is that so and so, which meant nothing to me, and then she ran off to help her get up. 

10) A lady sits downstairs by the glass windows--she is dressed up fancy like older healthy people are want to do. Next to her is an older gentleman in a turtleneck, but he is just visiting and is her son. They seem to be sort of wealthy as they sit upright in the high-back chairs and discuss family and what she's been eating at the home. They look askance at some of the other patients who are crying out in pain. 

The nursing home, like the hospital is a horrible place to be, even when you have to be there.

In both places, even the most caring doctors and nurses and attendants, cannot make up for the fact that you are a prisoner of age, failing health, and disability--and let's face it, even if many are nice or attentive, not everyone is. 

I am still unclear why people must suffer so--why we haven't found a better way to end good, productive, and loving lives.  

I am not sure that people are really even focused on this issue of old age, because it's not sexy, it's at the end anyway, and "they had the chance to live their lives."

Maybe, it's because we simply don't have the answers yet, can't afford what they would take, or we would just rather not deal with mortality, pain, and suffering when there are so many other things to do. 

But one day, we all will face the piper--and it would be comforting if we had better answers.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

From The Window In the Nursing Home

Technology Heals

My wife took this photo today at The Drupal for Government Conference at NIH.

The man in the photo was not only participating in the conference, but also taking notes on his Apple Macbook Air. 

It is incredible how technology is helping us do our jobs and be ever more productive.

This is the vision of technology taking us beyond the natural limits we all have and face. 

I remember a few years ago when I was in the hospital for something and feeling bad about myself, and my wife brought me a laptop and said "Write!"--it was liberating and I believe helped me heal and recuperate.

I wonder if hospitals in the future will regularly provide computers and access to patients to not only keep them connected with their loved ones, but also let them have more options for entertainment, creativity, and even productivity, to the extent they can, while getting well.

Kudos to this gentleman--he is truly a role model and inspiration for us all. 

(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)

Technology Heals

Living Longer, But With Worse Quality Of Life

Watching my parents age over the years has been hard--and very painful. 

They are good people--they've worked hard all their lives (nothing was just given to them), they are devoted to serving G-d, and they are loved by their family, friends, and community. 

They have lived a good life and we are grateful for every day.

Yet as they are getting older, the body like anything physical, starts to get sick and break down. 

Both my parents have serious illnesses, and in the last two years my mom has become almost totally disabled and is moving from a rehab center to a nursing home this coming week. 

I read this week in the Wall Street Journal, what I've been watching with my own eyes...we are living "longer, but not healthier lives."

Over the last 2 decades, life expectancy has risen 3 years to 78 years, but unfortunately only 68 of those, on average, are in good health--meaning that people suffer for about ten years with various disabilities.

What is amazing is that people are being pressed to retire later in life with an increase in age to receive full social security benefits to 67 by 2022--giving the average person a healthy retirement to enjoy of just 1 year!

With the average working household having less the $3,000 in retirement savings, things are not looking too good for Americans to retire young and enjoy their healthy years either. 

Additionally, despite longer living, in the last 2 decades, the U.S. fell from 20th place to 27th place in 34 member nations of the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) for life expectancy and quality of life.

The leading causes of death remain heart disease, cancer, and stroke.  And disabilities are being driven by back, muscle, nerve, and joint disorders. 

Seeing with my own parents, the deteriorating quality of life and true suffering as they age, I am left questioning the real wisdom of keeping people alive, when the quality of life has so deteriorated as to leave them in pain and misery. 

While no one wants to lose their loved ones--the emptiness is devastating--at the same time, watching them endlessly and needlessly suffer is worse. 

I see my mom clutching her wheelchair, always in various states of discomfort and pain, and less and less able to help herself, in almost any way--it is tragic. 

So I ask myself is it also unnecessary and wrong? 

I call it forcing people alive. We keep people going not only with extraordinary measures, but also with day-to-day medicines and care that keeps their hearts pumping, their lungs breathing, and their brains somewhat aware. 

The patients are alive, but are in a sense dying a long and painful death, rather than a quick and painless one. 

I love my parents and mom who is suffering so much now, and I don't want to lose her, by does really caring for her mean, at some point, letting her go.

I tell my dad, "I just want mom to have peace"--no more suffering!

For the average person, 68 years of health is too short, but 10 years of disability and suffering may be too long. 

We use advances in technology and medical breakthroughs to keep people alive. But what is the cost in pain and disability, and even in cold hard dollar terms for a nation being gobbled up by deficits, longevity, and miserable disease and disability? 

People are living longer but at a significant painful price! 

Is this real compassion and empathy or a senseless fight with the Angel of Death? 

(Source Photo: here with attribution to wwwupertal)

Living Longer, But With Worse Quality Of Life

A Boy Whose Name Is Light

Recently, I inspired by an award-winning documentary that I watched on Netflix called Praying With Lior (2007).

The movie is about the development and spiritual maturation of a Jewish child with Down Syndrome to his Bar Mitzvah (and a few years past). 

As a young child, Lior Liebling is comforted by his mother, who is a Rabbi, who teaches Lior to pray and sing to G-d. 

She holds him and they share an amazing bond both maternal and spiritual that never leaves Lior. 

Unfortunately, the mother has breast cancer and passes away when Lior is only 6.

Right before his bar mitzvah, Lior goes to his mother's gravesite and clings to it saying, "I miss you," and then breaks down in tears that I could feel or imagined rising up to the heavens itself. 

Lior is deeply loved by his family--father (also a Rabbi), stepmother, and 3 siblings--who play, engage, teach him, and learn from him as well. 

Lior means light in Hebrew, and Lior brings light to everyone he meets--inspiration to overcome challenge, deep love of G-d and community, and faith that his mother is watching over him. 

Lior makes it to his bar-mitzvah--and becomes a proverbial Jewish man--he says the blessing, reads from the Torah, celebrates with his family and loved ones, and even gives a speech on the importance of Torah. 

At the celebration, he goes over to another retarded girl, and says something about how she is special and that "I am going to marry you."

I watched this young man, Lior, pray with a rigor that I have not been able to do for some time, and I was inspired not by the words he said, nor the song he sang, or even the cheer he brought others, but rather I think I was moved by the simple sincerity and purity of his heart. 

Lior didn't want anything, didn't have an agenda, wasn't trying to do anything to anybody, he was just a soul that reached out to others--loving them, hugging them, kissing them, and yes, praying with them--often actually leading the services. 

One of Lior's classmates that was interviewed said that everyone has a test, and Lior's is an incredibly difficult one--but he is succeeding extraordinarily by not only surviving with his disability, but also showing others the way. 

Thank you Lior for being such an amazing inspiration to us all--may you go from strength to strength and someday reunite with not only your heavenly father, but also your mother who awaits to sing and pray with you in great joy again. 

A Boy Whose Name Is Light

Life Building 101

The Guardian U.K. (2 April, 2011) has this wonderfully inspiring story about a very special body builder.

Dr. Charles Eugster is a dentist and athlete extraordinaire--you see Eugster is 91 years old.

And he says that "At 85 I had a crisis. I looked at myself in the mirror, and saw an old man. I was overweight, my posture was terrible and there was skin hanging off me. I looked like a wreck."

Now, he is doing dips, crunches, chin-ups, and push ups and scoring higher than contestants in ANY other age category.

Eugster says "I'm not chasing youthfulness, I'm chasing health."

Although he was already rowing 6 times a week when he was in his late-80s, he figured he could push himself a little harder and so he joined a body building club--OMG, this guy's attitude is amazing!

What an inspiration...

His outlook is that "We're told that old age is a continuous state of decline, and that we should stop working, slow down and prepare to die. I disagree...one day something will happen and that will be it. But until that day comes, I'm going to carry on working my abs!"

While none of us know when our time us up, it seems that we can choose how we approach our personal maturation--we can look at it as reaching a peak and then going over the proverbial cliff of life OR we can fight to continuously transform ourselves--for as long as we can--and to always try and be the best we can be.

Age, sex, race, color, religion, national origin, or disability--none of these should inhibit us from working our hardest and going for the gold of what is meaningful in life to us.

I remember a wise saying I learned from my teachers--the competition is really not with anyone else, it is with yourself.

So to me it's not really body building we're talking about, but rather life building--and this is something we can all strive for.

Life Building 101