Yom Kippur, When The Masks Come Off

This mask does not mean that Jews have horns--that is a crappy and evil stereotype, so cut it out. 

Masks are dress-up and pretend, like the way most people behave day-in and day-out. 

People imagine and feign to be what they would like to be or what they want others to believe they are. 

Like when someone is gearing up for a fight, they extend their arms, raise their voices, bob up and down to make themselves appear bigger and more formidable than they really are. 

It's a fake out--but perception is (often) reality. 

Similarly, people may wear clothes, drive cars, or live in big fancy homes that make them look well-to-do, but really it's a great act and all bought on extensive credit (ever hear of 0% down!). 

Others may dream of being seen as smart and the go-to guy for answers, the subject matter expert, or the generally wise person for advice and guidance, but are they really smarter than everyone else or do the degrees plastering the wall like wallpaper or titles like doctor, lawyer, accountant, entrepreneur, professor, and Rabbi simply often invoke credentials and an air rather than the smarts that should accompany them.

Even parents may pose for loving pictures with their children, seem to dote on them, and act the helicopter parents, but still when it comes to their own busy schedules, they have no real time or attention left for the little ones--because the parents put themselves first. 

It happens all the time, every which way, the authority figure who really abuses their authority rather than lives up to it. 

People are human, weak, fallible--and the show is often a lot better than the characters behind it. 

But that doesn't mean we stop trying to be inside what we know we really should be--more loving, caring, giving, and good people. 

This is the essence of Yom Kippur to me, the Day of Atonement--the day when we shed all our phony masks--and instead we bear out our sins, bend our heads with shame, are sorry for what we have done wrong, and commit to doing better in the future.

Yom Kippur is the day when all the masks are off--we cannot hide from G-d Almighty, the all seeing and all knowing.  

On Rosh Hashanah, the Day of Judgement we are inscribed, and on Yom Kippur the book is sealed. 

In Judgement, we may enter the court of heaven with heads still held up high, with the same act that we try to show every day, but on Yom Kippur we leave the court with our heads down and our hands humbly clasped, the sentence meted out for who we really are--based not on pretense, but on our underlying behavior.

A mask covers what is, when the mask is off we are left with who we are--naked before our maker, where all is revealed, and we must account for our actions--good, bad, or even just plain indifferent. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Yom Kippur, When The Masks Come Off

Blogging On Percocet

So I'm one day post op from my 2nd hip replacement.

They definitely gave me a little too much Percocet this morning and on an empty stomach too...so I'm still feeling a little nauseous and loopy. 

I had my first physical therapy this morning and there is another planned for this afternoon.

It was really hard to walk and every little step was in pain...I asked the nurse half jokingly whether it was okay to curse as we went down the hall with the walker.

While I realize that I still have quite a way to go, I am glad to be starting the process of getting back on my feet again.

I am grateful to G-d for all his mercy, for my family and friends,(especially Dossy here with me and my very understanding daughters who put up with my kvetching through all this), and the superior surgical and medical care that I realize not everyone in the world has so readily available. 

Thank you to everyone for keeping me in your thoughts and prayers. ;-)

Blogging On Percocet

Freak Accidents, Illnesses, And Events

Dave Goldberg, the CEO of Survey Monkey (and the husband of Sheryl Sandberg, the COO of Facebook), died suddenly in a freakish accident falling off a treadmill and hitting his head. 

Poof...dead at age 47!

Unfortunately, we hear all the time about these type of tragic occurrences to people.

And of course tragedy knows no bounds--so while sh*t happens everyday to people from all walks of life, we tend to pay more attention when it's someone we know and love or when it's splashed wildly in the news about fabulously successful people we admire and follow. 

- Entertainer, Michael Jackson (50) dead from drug intoxication after suffering cardiac arrest.

- Actor, Robin Williams (63) dead by hanging suicide. 

- Singer, John Lennon (40) shot in the back by someone he had autographed an album for.

- Martial Artist, Bruce Lee (33) died on a movie set from a cerebral edema.

- Model, Marilyn Monroe (33) dead by drug overdose.

- President, John F. Kennedy (46) dead by assassination.

Whether by a plane crash or car accident, drowning or fire, poison or electrocution, a criminal or animal attack, terrorism, war, or natural disaster, a heart attack, stroke, or cancer, through suicide, punishment, or mercy killing...regardless of the probabilities and statistics, many people never make it all the way to "a ripe old age." 

We feel bad, shake our heads, say a few words of sympathy perhaps, when we hear of these lives cut short.

But like the TV shows, Six Feet Under (HBO) or 1000 Ways To Die (Spike)--there are a near endless number of horrible ways to go--and they can take you at literally any time.

While we can't stop living and just sit around worrying all the time about all the bad things that can happen, we do need to remember that anything can happen at any time (and these things are not so freakish after all)--no one is beyond the Angel of Death, no one should be arrogant, and we should make the most of every single moment that G-d lovingly grants to us.  ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution to Military Health)

Freak Accidents, Illnesses, And Events

The Best Cut

So I wasn't sure I wanted to share this, but my wife encouraged me in an effort to help others going through similar things.

Recently, I went to the Surgeon about my other hip to read my MRI...

After having read the report myself before the appointment, I was convinced I was heading under the knife again with the pain I was experiencing, challenges getting around, and the verbiage in the report like: 

"Significant..."

"Advanced."

Anyway, my daughter came along because I wasn't sure I was going to easily get parking in this place...always a challenge there. 

Waiting for the doctor, I asked G-d for a miracle, since after all the hospitalizations this last year, I literally thought that another one at this time could very well kill me.

Low and behold, the doctor comes in and as if G-d is directing his speech for the next 40 minutes or so, he does everything to dissuade me from having the surgery this month, even though he was the one at the last appointment that had already booked me on his surgical calendar. 

So today the miracle unfolded...

First, the doctor read my MRI, but then quickly flipped the screen to an MRI of another patient--a 76 year old--and he showed me the unbelievable progression of the osteoarthritis from near onset to ultimately the complete collapse of the joint over about 9 years time for this lady...the last MRI looked like complete and utter bone devastation--I had never seen anything like it!

Next he opened his drawer and took out a horror basket of used replacement joints parts that he had removed from patients that needed revision--he showed me the wear and breakage and described in horrible detail how he often has to dig these out of the bones of his patients and how each revision--which everyone will need after about 10-15 years or sooner if they become symptomatic--becomes more complicated and dangerous in terms of infection, blood clots, and recovery. 

Then he told how in the field so many replacement surgeries do not go well and that he sees 3-5 patients a week who come to him because they are UN-happy with the replacements their doctors did. 

This went on and on, and bottom line...he said, "I love to do the surgeries--I really do--but wait as long as you can before getting it [on the other hip], since while it can provide for short term improvements, each revision is worse, and at your age you could need three--on each side."

Needless-to-say, from this whole thing, I was in utter shock and some disbelief as I had been told these prosthetics can last 20-25 years with the newer models, and I was not aware of what the revisions really entailed in later years or the challenges they brought. 

As he continued to describe the risks in painful vivid details (note, I was his last appointment of the day and he was talking his time here), my eyes were literally welling up in tears.

I looked over at my daughter and she was sitting mouth agape shaking her head at what he was saying. I was deeply sorry that she had to sit through this (what we had thought was a simple MRI reading and confirmation of the upcoming procedure date). 

I left the doctor's office, of course, canceling the surgery--still in severe pain and with trouble walking--however, "scared straight" to make the best of this for now, but also afraid of what lies ahead. 

I have to have faith that the L-rd who made the miracle to hold off on the surgery for now will continue to guide and protect me through this illness that today has no cure. 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Best Cut

Disabled, Can You Imagine?

A very important article in the Wall Street Journal by Anthony Weller about what it's like to Paralyzed From The Neck Down.

Weller has suffered for 10 years with primary progressive multiple sclerosis. 

He describes losing everything...from "incalculable personal pleasures" to being "totally helpless."

And what's more, you have to save your chips in asking others for things, because "you'd be asking the whole day."

"Say goodbye to any sense of personal space, too"--in needing everything, you're essentially left like an open book to everyone around you.

Here, I can't help thinking about those moments of personal indignity--in caring for our own bodies--that even that someone else must be there for.

Then, there is the just sitting around and endless thinking..."There isn't much else to do."

I remember learning about some medieval torture methods and one involved lying a person down in the space cleaved into the stone face of the dungeon and there a person would essentially rot--not being able to move, sit or stand up, or even roll over. 

How long could a person last like that before completely losing their mind?  

While Weller says that he used to imagine being paralyzed as feeling like being "encased in stone," but now he see it more that your limbs just ignore you, to me whether you are paralyzed in your own body or embedded in medieval stone, the challenges physically and mentally are as scary as anything that can be imagined. 

How do you keep your sanity, let alone any hope?

Weller says, you live in the past, "happiness isn't is, but was, [and] you try not to contemplate the future too much."

G-d should have infinite mercy on his creations and lift up the fallen, cure the sick, and release the innocent that are imprisoned...please, please, please let it be. Amen.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Disabled, Can You Imagine?

Who Will Help?

This is an awesome video that has gone viral.

A social experiment with hidden camera filming of a homeless child freezing on the streets of Manhattan...

See the people just walking on by--completely ignoring or plain unaffected by the suffering taking place literally right next to them. 

Where is the compassion of the people?

Many are just rushing by, chatting away, and/or carrying fancy filled bags from nearby shopping excursions.

The bystanders walk past and practically over this boy's shivering body lying in ragged shirt, without a coat, and lying half inside a big black garbage bag on the street. 

I imagined G-d looking down on this extreme callousness of his creations ignoring the suffering of this boy and being quite upset. 

Perhaps, there are unfortunately so many people now homeless , hungry, and begging in the streets that our minds and hearts have simply learned to "tune it out."

The ending is really amazing...when the one person who comes over to care for the poor boy is a black homeless man--who ends up taking off his own coat and gives it to the child. 

May G-d open our eyes to the pain of our brethren and grant us compassionate hearts to sincerely care one for each other. ;-)

Who Will Help?

Homeless in DC

The plight of the homeless in DC, the nation's capital, continues unabetted. 

People homeless and hungry stumble down the steets with their carts of worldy possessions or sit on the corners begging for someone to help them. 

As these destitute and desperate souls look for some shelter, warmth, a place to rest, some clean clothes, medical care, or simply something to eat, they pass almost like ghosts throughtout the city. 

Most people running (late) to the office, seem to barely extend a glance as they sidestep and shuffle past these people, who I remember one unsavory colleague calling them, "human waste."

But these are G-d creatures, down on their luck, and they could be any one of us!

Does the city and the people, the powerful of the nation, have the heart to help those in need? ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Homeless in DC

Understanding Disability

So true story...

There is a wonderful lady in the workplace...one of the nicest people. 

Unfortuantely, she has a disability and it is not easy...at times, she expresses to me the pain and the challenges, but always she maintains the best attitude and is an inspiration to everyone here. 

Not to compare, because thank G-d, I have been so blessed, but with the hip replacement and various complications, I have come to better understand physical pain and difficult mobility. 

Sometimes, as people do, we ask, "Why?"--and often we just come to the refrain that "G-d must have his reasons"--to teach us and to grow us in some way. 

Well, in speaking with this lovely women, she must have heard me really listening and understanding or seen my empathy with her, because at one point, she starts nodding and goes almost with surprise, "You really do understand."

Then she adds something about it being so odd for a manager to understand these things. 

I was so humbled by what she said, but more important. I felt a light bulb go on over my head. 

Why does G-d give us the challenges we face in life (physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, etc.)?

Because it helps us to truly understand and emphasize with other human beings...to be compassionate, caring, and giving (not self absorbed, narcissist, and me-me-me!)

In a sense, only by knowing the pain and suffering of others (or some elements of it--"Been there," "Experienced it," "I Know where you're coming from!"), can we substantially make that ultimate human and spiritual connection.

No, I am not saying we all have to be in horrible pain and misfortune--G-d forbid--just that the reasons for pain and suffering in life is not completely a mystery. 

My father used to say, "If we didn't have suffering, we wouldn't know or appreciate how good we have it the rest of the time." 

But it's also that we won't know or understand the challenges our neighbors, friends, and colleagues have--and adequately care for and about them.

G-d in his infinite wisdom has his ways to teach us--it should be with ultimate mercy, in good health and peace, and not pain and suffering--but when we oursleves are challenged, doesn't it open our eyes to see others and the world in a whole new and "better" way? ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Understanding Disability

Shoes On the Dumpster

So I had a great new pair of sandals that I wore just 3-4 times, but they didn't fit right on me.

We wanted to give them to a poor person, but didn't want to just walk up to someone on the street and say, "Hey, do you need a pair of shoes?"

So down in Fort Lauderdale here there are plenty of needy people, and we decided to leave them prominently on a trash/recycle bin on the street where we were confident that someone in need would see them and take them.

We left the shoes at about 5:45 pm and went to the store for some errands, and literally by the time we circled back not half an hour later, the shoes were gone.

It is terrible to see people on the street in need of food, clean clothes, and just a pair of shoes. 

While it was rewarding to see that someone got these shoes, the fact that they were gone so quickly shows me clearly that there is still so much more that needs to be done.

Too much poverty, too much suffering...my daughter says "Dad, we can change things!"

I hope someway we can all make a difference and help all the people that are in need--those are some mighty big shoes we need to fill, but I pray in my heart that G-d will help us all succeed. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Shoes On the Dumpster

Homeless At Foggy Bottom

The homeless situation in Washington D.C. (as in other big cities in the U.S.) is horrible and tragic. 

The homeless person here is wrapped in a blanket trying to stay warm on her wheelchair. 

Further, her bucket, at her feet, for people to give is empty. 

The Thanksgiving holiday is this week, but where is the thanks and where is the giving?

Interesting...halfway down the block is GW Hospital and across the street behind this lady is a gorgeous, modern, brand new GW University engineering and science building (almost completed now). 

The haves, the have mores, and the have nots. 

Where are all the trillions of dollars of spending going..,that we can't feed, clothe, shelter, and educate our people. 

We need to do better as a society for providing care for the truly needy.

G-d is watching what we do and what we don't do.

Our test. and the test of our elected officials/leadership--will we/they stand up for those that can't? 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Homeless At Foggy Bottom

Exodus Hollywood Style 2014

Very excited about the new Exodus movie coming next month. 

Looks high budget action and with great special effects.

Hopefully, not a disappointment like Noah (2014 film)--I don't think it will be. 

Good wins over evil--well, we all know that already from the Bible!

According to the Passover Haggadah, we are supposed to retell every year, from generation to generation, our story of going from the cruel enslavement by evil dictators to the redemption by the merciful Almighty G-d.

It's timeless and our history!  ;-)

(Note: Movie name is Exodus G-ds and Kings, but there is only one G-d.)

Exodus Hollywood Style 2014

^^^To The Six Million^^^

I am dedicating my 2001st blog post to my 6 million! Jewish brothers and sisters who were murdered in the Holocaust. 

May G-d have mercy on their souls and in their name bless us, the survivors, to do his holy bidding and good deeds. 

Thank you G-d for bringing me to this time and for all your enduring kindness. 

May you give me the strength and inspiration to carry on as a hopefully positive influence in this world. 

(Source Photo of Miami Holocaust Memorial: Andy Blumenthal)

^^^To The Six Million^^^

Psychotherapy, In The Beginning

Wow, I love this early photo of psychotherapy.

The girl is lying on some pillows on 2 chairs. 

The Freudian doctor leans over the girl and is yanking on his goatee listening intently...and analyzing!

A man, that I assume is the girls dad is in the background, hovering protectively and hoping she is feeling better soon. 

The mind, like the body, unfortunately can get sick. 

And we need to take care of ourselves and seek help to get better. 

Fear not the competent doctor who really cares and sincerely wants to help (and is not just in it as a pure business).

Pray that G-d guides him to heal you and give you strength in body and peace of mind. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Psychotherapy, In The Beginning

Walk Like A Chicken

So I've been reading about the use of virtual reality for the military veterans as a way to help the healing process of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

But this was something different yesterday in downtown D.C....

Using virtual reality to "See Life Through A Chicken's Eyes"--complements of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA). 

So I go up and ask the attendant what this is all about. 

She says, "You can take the virtual reality tour and walk around a field as a chicken!"

She goes on, "Only we're having some trouble with the technology, so can you come back in 20 minutes?"

Uh, okay, but 2 things:

1. Yes, I do believe in ethical treatment for everyone (including animals), and no one should suffer where we can (and should) prevent it. 

2. I did just have some chicken (only Kosher, of course!) to eat just last week (and it was pretty good), and while I am curious to see the virutal reality, I can't make it back here in 20 minutes, but thank you!

Lesson: Treat all life compassionately, but I don't have to walk around as a chicken to see that! ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Walk Like A Chicken

Taking A Bow

Wow--this is some an awesome piece of art!

Aside from the beauty of it, what do I think about looking at this?

Something like this:

Some people take a bow in arrogance and self-aggrandizement, while others are bowed in humbleness and grace.

Those who see only their own greatness fail to see all those people, factors, and most importantly, G-d's mercy that enabled them to achieve what they have. 

We are but agents of the heavenly maker above who endows us with creativity and the ability to capitalize on it. 

We should be bowed in thankfulness to G-d, but unfortunately all too often instead stare in the mirror admiring our own image that we imagine is so talented and successful because of who we are and what we ourselves have done--that we can't even contain our bursting self-satisfaction in wonderful selves. 

Yes, it's good to recognize when we do something good and when we make mistakes so that we can learn from them, but G-d is not only our one-time maker, but he gives us the knowledge, skills, abilities, and good fortune to succeed in what he wills. 

I remember being taught in Jewish day school that not a leaf falls from a tree without G-d wishing it--that G-d is not only the creator, but is intimately involved every moment with us and the world.  

Like the most brilliant computer that can calculate gazillions of calculations a second, G-d can orchestrate the fates of all his creations in a just and masterful way that takes everything we do and don't do into account.

May it be G-d's will to endow us with what we need to succeed and for us to be deserving of it, and to recognize from where it all comes and not be so in awe of ourselves that we fail to see our innate limitations and mortality that is us. 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Taking A Bow

The Light Of Heaven

What a gorgeous sky is South Florida.

The wondrous sun shining through the beautiful clouds floating overhead.

May the light be a healing light and may the power of the L-rd above reign over us in mercy.

From ebola and other illnesses to a sick economy, gruesome terrorism, and general inaction all around, we need G-d more than ever to show us the way.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Light Of Heaven

Reflections On Our Journey

As we approach the holy Yom Kippur, the annual day of Judgement following the Jewish New Year, we realize how everything is in G-d's hands...

But we can repent, pray, and do good deeds to influence our journey and Hashem's decree. 

Thank you Bettty Monoker for sharing this wonderful, thought-provoking video at this reverent time of year. 

Reflections On Our Journey

Solidarity For All Our Children

The global Jewish community has been rocked by the abduction of 3 teenagers (ages 16, 16, and 19) by Hamas, a terrorist organization that rejects peace and is dedicated to "obliterate" Israel . 

I saw a photo someone posted on Facebook where it said that the families of these boys had empty seats at their beautiful Shabbat table, and I couldn't imagine the grief of the mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, grandparents, and other family and friends of these poor children.

Walking in the community around Washington, D.C., I see signs such as this with "Bring Back Our Boys" with ribbons tied to trees--and I am deeply moved by people's expression of grief and hope. 

This all happening just weeks after another extremist Muslim group, Boko Haram, abducted over 230 Nigerian schoolgirls, and the rallying cry for "Bring Back Our Girls."

I read how the these girls are being threatened with being sold in a massive human trafficking crime against humanity and can only imagine the rape and other torture they must be enduring by their captors. 

I remember as just a child in day school seeing photos and videos from the Holy Land of what these types of terrorists did to their victims--it was horrific!

Aside from the general torture, beatings, isolation, and starvation, I saw images where they literally wrapped their prisoners in barbed wire, including their genitals--it was not just grotesque, but pure and utter evil. 

I never forgot these images of unbelievable cruelty, and wish only for the return of all these children and for the people that would take them to be brought to true justice. 

May G-d have mercy on all our children!

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Solidarity For All Our Children

Love, Strength

This has been an enormously tough year with the loss of my mom, my dad going into assisted living, and my hip replacement and complications.

I have found myself torn from my normal routine--my structure, my discipline--and thrown instead into a world of unknowns, hopes, and definitely prayers. 

Throughout, my family and close friends have stood by me--as I gave the eulogy for mom, as I moved my father out of his loving home, and as I growled in pain with the osteoarthritis and then joint replacement.  

When my daughter took my hand telling me all be well, when my youngest drove me to the doctors and PT, and when my wife fought for my care--I feel eternally grateful to have these people in my life.

With all the technology in the world, there is nothing like a human being to reach out and grab a hold off. 

One of my colleagues asked me what I have learned from all of this, and I'd say three things:

- Take time to reflect on the direction of your life and work to make the tough changes while you're able.
- Empathize with the plight of others, be merciful and compassionate, and help where you see the slightest opportunity. 
- Be sincerely grateful for everything you have and remember who is the Master of all. ;-)

(Source Photo: Michelle Blumenthal)

Love, Strength

Driving Identity Theft

It's been only about 4 months since my mom passed, and now my dad becomes very sick from chemotherapy and ends up in the hospital for a week.

His red and white blood count were extremely low, but thank G-d, the doctors were able to save him.

However, he is in a drastically weakened state and now looks like he will need regular assisted living just to get by every day. 

This has been horrible to see someone who has always been so strong, smart, and there selflessly for all of us, to be in this condition. 

We found a nice place for him, but even the nicest place isn't his place and doesn't allow the independence he (and we all) always cherish. 

On top of it, I get a letter in the mail with more than half a dozen tickets on his car.

It's impossible, because he hasn't been driving due to his illness.

We run down to check his car, and sure enough someone stole his plates (and replaced them with another set). 

They did this to his car that has handicapped tags.

In the meantime, they are driving around through tolls and doing G-d knows what.

The police were helpful--they came as soon as they could--took a report, the plates that were switched onto his car, and dusted for fingerprints.

I will never forget standing there just after my joint surgery--when not three hours before, I thought to myself, maybe things are finally calming down. 

Hopefully, the police will catch whoever did this. 

In the meantime, I take comfort knowing that G-d is the ultimate police force. ;-)

(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)

Driving Identity Theft