Showing posts with label Special Needs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Special Needs. Show all posts

October 30, 2022

A “Sign” of Good Synagogue Character

Please see my new article in The Times of Israel called "A 'Sign' of Good Synagogue Character."

I was literally sitting in the synagogue and crying, watching the speaker sign and listening to the voice from the interpreter. I really believe that all our synagogues, schools, work places, and organizations need to better incorporate diversity and disability into the environment, and not just by paying meaningless lip-service to it, but by enabling everyone to come, feel welcome, participate, and be together as all children of G-d naturally should be.
Finally, it was beautiful to have the synagogue let someone who was deaf have the pulpit and the ability to speak to us. It would be so awesome for everyone’s voice to be heard. We take our abilities (such as speaking, hearing, and being mobile) for granted. So let’s design the community with all the people in mind and give everyone a true voice. In the end, it’s not just what they say, but some things are communicated more than words.

(Source Photo: RODNAE Productions; https://www.pexels.com/photo/close-up-on-heart-sign-done-by-woman-10029313/)
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August 26, 2017

Look Down To Feel Up

Listen, everyone has problems.

Whoever I talk to has something bad and fairly serious to complain about, and there seems to be new things coming all the time.

Just today, I heard from one person who went to the dentist with a tooth pain only to discover it had been silently infected for over a year, and was so serious that it literally could've killed him.

Another person told be about having a child with special needs and moving to an area with a school that could more effectively deal and help them. 

And a third person told me how they lost their husband many years ago at the age of just 39-years old and being left a widow. 

But people make the best of it!

They have to.

I remember my father saying when my mother got so sick with Parkinson's Disease:
"We are part of the survivors club."

It wasn't easy to see her endless suffering while he selflessly tried to help her day-in and -out and cope with the physical and emotional pain of it all. 

When I was younger my dad would teach me about not feeling bad whatever the situation, and to always be grateful for what you have, and he told the story:
"There was a poor man who had no shoes, and he felt very bad...that is, until he saw someone else who had no feet."

It doesn't take much for things to get really bad in life...sometimes it can seem like we're literally just holding on by a thin thread. 

But as G-d tests us and teaches us, we need to try to look on the bright side and be grateful that things aren't worse....and yes, they can even get better again. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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July 4, 2015

L@@king The Other Way

So recovering from surgery and with my cane in hand the last number of weeks, I've had a chance to see the worst and best of people. 

Especially on the Metro, I've had people who quite simply refused to let me sit down--can you say look the other way or ignorance is bliss?

One guy the other day saw me holding on to the overhead rail with one hand and the cane in the other, he looked me in the eye, and then looked back down again to work on whatever notes he was writing...certainly more important. 

And even early on a couple of times (this was when it was still hard to really stand up for long) when I asked for one of the special access seats from completely healthy people sitting there, I usually got the stone cold kvetchy faces like "You talking to me?"

At other times, waiting to get on the Metro, I've had people rush in front of me, try to push me aside, or even nearly trample me when they felt I just wasn't moving my limp leg fast enough. 

I think this has been particularly disheartening especially when I see this behavior coming from people of different faiths who were clearly observant at least in other ways...uh, don't we answer to an even higher authority?

When some empathic folks at work recently asked me, how people were treating me on the Metro (yes, they know how it is!), I said feeling frustrated one day that the only difference between DC and NY is that in NY there was probably a greater chance of someone trying to actually push me (G-d forbid) in front of an oncoming train--yeah, at times it seriously felt that way. 

I will say that thank G-d not everyone is such a you know what!

Although truly it's been the exception and not the rule, there have been some very nice people that did offer me a seat, let me go first, or didn't rush me on/off the moving escalator. 

One lady in particular was extraordinarily wonderful, and when I was crossing a very wide two-way street with lots of cars and the light was getting ready to change, she walked by my side--literally shielding me from the oncoming traffic, and she said "Don't worry, they won't hit both of us!"

I remember learning in yeshiva some very basics of human decency...get up before the aged, remove an obstacle from before a blind person, and to take off a heavy burden from even your enemy's stumbling animal.

I think these and other lessons in school and at home sensitized me to people's pain and suffering and where possible to try and help--not that I am a saint, I'm not, but at least I feel my conscience talks to me.  ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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September 9, 2013

Remember Those With Special Needs

This was an interesting sign at the swimming pool about handling sensitive gender issues with children.

The sign tells parents of "opposite gender children," over age 5, not to take them in the locker room with them.

Instead they are told to use a separate locker room for "special needs."

Then underneath, in the lower right corner, someone wrote in pen (it's light, so you may not be able to read it), "Ok, but then enforce handicapped changing room!!"

Having an accident recently and being on crutches and then a cane, I myself have developed a whole new awareness for how difficult the mundane can be. 

When I asked the doctor, why so-and-so happened to me, he said, "you're not getting any younger!"

It was really a wake up call for me. 

We don't always think of all the various special needs out there: people with handicaps, illnesses, and injuries of all sorts (physical, emotional, etc.), issues related to aging, single parents, orphaned children, people taking care of young children and/or aging parents, people newly divorced or bereaving, people out of work or "simply" changing careers or perhaps moving or even immigrating, and many more.  

There are so many situations which can create special needs for people. 

Often at work, I see announcements for groups that help people undergoing various life changes--creating these special needs. I glance at the information about the group meetings, but usually don't have or take the time to fully stop and really think about what these all mean for people and how it impacts them--both their personal lives and their professional ones. 

Seeing the signage reminding people to use special locker rooms when they need to deal discretely with children of the opposite sex or for changing rooms for those with disabilities...it was just another jolt for me to think of others and help them whenever possible. 

Sometimes when I see someone who is old or disabled going slowly down the street, I think to myself--even though I may be in hurry--that I should slow down and not pass them quickly, so as not to make them feel bad--and now when I broke my ankle, I realized it was my turn and had to go slow.

Everyone goes through times when they have special needs. 

The key is when we aren't special needs for a moment in time that we remember how fortunate we are and that everything is temporary--both good and bad. 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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