Showing posts with label Innocent. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Innocent. Show all posts

September 21, 2018

There's A Reason For Everything

I go to the fridge to look for something to eat. 

I find am empty food storage container on the shelf. 

I recognize it from the day before when it was filled with delicious over-baked salmon. 

So I go to one kid who I guess may be the culprit and I ask:
Why did you leave the empty bowl in the fridge and not clean it out when you were done?

She says:
Dad, I didn't do it. 

So, I feel like a jerk and apologize for thinking maybe it was her.

Then I go to the other kid and say:
Did you leave an empty dirty salmon bowl in the fridge?

And she says to me:
I did.

So I ask rhetorically thinking there was no acceptable reason:

Why did you do that?


She says sweetly to me:
My sister was sleeping and I didn't want to wake her by washing out the bowl.

And I knew she meant it. 

I wouldn't have imagined a reason for leaving an empty dirty bowl in the fridge, but it just goes to show not to misjudge people--there is usually a reason for everything. ;-)

(Source Photo: Amazon)
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May 18, 2017

Classified Nuts

Something about this advertisement seemed perfect for this week:

"I didn't realize these nuts were classified."

So said the chipmunk.

This was posted the same week that intelligence about ISIS was shared with the Russians from the oval office.

The Prez is entitled to share whatever he wants and maybe he didn't realize "these nuts were classified." 

My bet is this was all sort of innocent, but either way we don't want to jeopardize critical intel sources and methods in our fight against our enemies and terror. 

It's their nuts that should be on the line and not ours. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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January 17, 2015

Temptation Or Accusation?

So on the way home from synagogue today, my wife and I are talking about what happened to the renown Harvard constitutional and criminal lawyer, Alan Dershowitz.

He was accused of having repeatedly had sex with an underage woman (while he was married with children and grandchildren).

I explained to my wife not to believe these accusations, that in my mind, Dershowitz was upstanding and completely innocent, and that this could happen to anyone.

And I went on to tell a funny story from a day earlier...

I was at a retirement party for one of my staff who served the country for 51 years.

At the party, I am going around talking with people and helping to make everyone comfortable--until I didn't.

One guy who was a retired manager and had come back to work as a contractor calls me over to his table to introduce me to his wife. 

He's motioning to her and saying how she is his most beloved wife.

And just joking around trying to keep a straight face, I say, "Hmm, she's a lot different than the other woman I see you with every day."

[Yeah, I don't know what came over me (maybe a little to much drink--any drink is too much for this dry mouth).]

His wife, is like, "Ah ha! Some other woman in the office..."

And he's leaning back, waving his hands and mouthing to me, "Shut up Andy!"

He goes, "Okay Andy, you just wait until I meet your wife!"

Then, we all broke out laughing...just Andy being a wise guy again!

So, I said to my wife, you see how easy it is for someone to make a false accusation (and how quickly people can be to think the worst of others).

It really is important to treat people as "innocent until proven guilty."

As for Andy's hijinks...I'm banned from any more parties for the next few weeks. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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December 30, 2014

Now That's A Plug!

So I see this young man with these large things in his earlobes. 

I turn to my wife and daughter and ask if they think it would be okay for me to ask him about them.

After the look at him and me a couple of times back and forth, I get the nod, okay. 

First, I had no idea those disks in his ears were called plugs.

(Now I'm a Jewish kid from the Bronx, and to me earplugs are what I use for swimming!)

I asked innocently, "How did you get your lobes that big?"

He then described this process where you start with an earring in your earlobe and over time, you stretch the hole with larger and larger insets.

He had been doing this for 8 years, but confessed that his holes could've been much larger by now.

I asked, "Do you ever take them out?"

He told me sure at night, and for showering, swimming, etc. 

Curious, I inquired what he does about the big flappy earlobes when the plugs aren't in.

The young man said, "It's no problem....it just hangs there."

At this point, I thank him for talking with me, but now am laughing at the conversation as I read it over, and happy to be a little innocent and even naive to some things. ;-)

 (Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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