April 30, 2013

Never Worn, But Not For The Reason You Think

I remember learning for my MBA about people's shopping addiction (aka compulsive shopping) and how it consumes their time and money and fuels their self-esteem. 

Like a high gotten from alcohol, drugs, and sex, shopping can give people a relief from the everyday stresses that engulf them.


An interesting article in the Wall Street Journal (18 April 2013) called "A Closet Filled With Regrets" chronicles how people buy stuff they never wear and are sorry they bought it. 


In fact, the article states, "Only about 20% of clothes in the average person's closet are worn on a regular basis."


One example given is a Pulitzer Prize -winning author who spent $587,000 on Gucci items between 2010-2012, before seeking treatment for his addiction. 


A related disorder is shopper's remorse that occurs, because people second guess themselves and feel maybe an alternative would've been a better choice (i.e. they made a bad choice), they didn't really need the item to begin with (i.e. it was just impulsive), or that they spent too much (i.e. they got a bad deal). 


For me, as a child of Holocaust survivors, I find that when I purchase something nice (not extravagant), I put away and also never wear it. 


The difference for me is not that I have shoppers remorse, an addiction to shopping, or that I am unhappy with my purchase, but rather that I cannot wear it because I feel as a child of survivors that I have to save it--just in case. 


No, it's not rational--even though I am a very practical and rational person in just about every other way.


It's just that having seen what can happen when times are bad--and people have nothing--I cannot bear to grant myself the luxury of actually wearing or using something really good.


Perhaps also, I look at my parent's generation, who suffered so much, and think why am I deserving of this? 


They sacrificed and survived, so we (their children) could have it better--what every parent wants for their children, or should.


But still, in my heart, I know that I am the one who has had it easy compared to their lives, and so those purchases are going to stay right where they are--never worn until I donate them to Goodwill. 


I never really considered them mine anyway. ;-)


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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April 29, 2013

Bathroom Kudos

Going to a restaurant the other night, I stepped into the men's room for a minute and noticed this sticker on the right of the mirror that said "Great Work" in big yellow letters on the red background. 

I wondered what a strange sign to put in such a private setting as if we need applause for going to the bathroom or washing our hands. 

Then again, if you've seen many men's bathrooms, it could certainly be a time for kudos when it is kept clean and people use good personal hygiene--hence, the other sticker on the left, "It's cool to care!"

The frog sticker in the middle, he's just keeping an eye on things and thanking everyone for the job well done. 

This is a funny commentary on our society these days where people seem to need a pat on the back for everything--even the highly mundane and personal. 

Presumably, going to the men's room will never be the same boring, uncaring event again--at least at this fine eating establishment. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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Credit Card Cola

This is great--finally soda vending machines that take credit cards. 

No more looking for change or losing your cash in the machine. 

Plastic takes a another win!

Electronic and mobile payments will put hard currency out of business--sooner or later. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 28, 2013

Vandalism and Vomit -- Only $2,500!

So we went to look at a new dorm-type apartment for my daughter. 

She and her friends want to be near campus and where everyone hangs out. 

When we got to the building, the front door glass was smashed in and wooden planks filled the space over the whole door. 

While we were waiting in front, a group of girls were walking in--and one was saying to the others, "Oh, he says he loves me, and he wants to have sex with me..."--then couldn't hear the rest as they continued by. 

Inside the lobby was this "Vandalism Report" with dates for each (not shown)--Take a look at it (THIS IS REAL!).

- Signs and fire extinguishers vandalized. 

- Beer cups thrown off the balcony.

- Graffiti painted on the walls. 

- And best for last...urine, vomit, rubbish, and blood discovered--at multiple times and in multiple places!

The slumlord landlord, buys up the filthy apartments, renovates them, and rents out two-bedroom units in this building for approximately $2500, split 4 ways among the students. 

He takes 2 months security deposit. 

And he makes each person responsible for all the others, so if one person backs out or doesn't pay, each of the other students are responsible--not just for their share (lease). 

He advertised one unit, but showed us another.

Then told us this one was also already taken and we should trust him and sign up for another unit that he is purchasing and "it will be the same thing, trust me!"

This whole thing was disappointing to my daughter who was excited to be with all her friends so close to campus. 

I was proud of her when my wife asked her despite how much she wanted this...did she feel this guy was trustworthy?--and she said, "No!"

Not sure who would want to live in a place like this...but my daughter was disappointed anyway.

It's hard to be practical, when the emotional side for people take over. 

These young people are victimized by the slumlords, who prey on their youth, inexperience, and needs. 

This place was disgusting--even so, it's tough to be a parent because you want your children to learn from mistakes, but mistakes can be so costly.

Funny thing is, there were plenty of kids in this building--where are the grownups? ;-)


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The Pain of Parkinson's

At the dedication of the new George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum, the picture of the elder Bush in a wheelchair really struck home.

My mom has Parkinson's Disease and is wheelchair bound. 

For a number of years, I have watched (feeling helpless) my mom go from a vibrant person to succumbing to the devastation of this disease of unknown origin. 

First, for many years (before we new) was a slowness of gait--with everyone yelling "come on mom, hurry up! Why so slow?"

Then, the uncontrolled shaking, especially of her hands, and deformity of the joints. 

Next came the difficulty moving, the shakiness when walking, and the falls--until the time, some nerves were damaged and her foot got turned inward, so she could no longer stand.

Therapy, a walker, and then a wheelchair, and now for most of the day--confined to bed and loss of basic movement that we usually take for granted. 

With loss of mobility, came loss of appetite, insomnia, depression, and GI problems. 

Despite visits to numerous medical experts--we could only treat the symptoms, but could never keep up somehow with the progression of the illness. 

My beautiful mom has suffered terribly, and my dad (despite his own medical challenges and age) has been her caretaker through it all.

Dad has done all the things for a person that can be done--on call every minute--until exhaustion at times. He has been nothing less than heroic in his deeds, dedicated to my mom and doing it with endless love for her--and always remaining (at least outwardly) optimistic and hopeful for both of them. 

My mom went to the hospital a week and a half ago and this last week was transferred to a home. 

Her eyes show the story of her suffering, and her body is drawn from fighting the illness, yet inside her the intelligence and love--she shows with a mere rise of her eyebrows and smirk--gives me strength. 

I love my mom and dad. It is a tough road when age and illness take their toll. 

It is scary to think at times what the future holds for each of us and how we will endure in the face of it. 

Mom and Dad have suffered in their lives from the holocaust, with seemingly endless hard work trying to make a living, and with debilitating illness. 

Their story and lives are a monument of strength and courage, love and devotion, and faith in the Almighty.
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April 27, 2013

Who Hasn't Been There?

So I was teaching a course this week in enterprise architecture, and some of the students asked about EA having a bad rap and brand (i.e. that it seems to not work so well in many organizations) and why is that? 

We had a pretty robust discussion around this--why some organizations fail and others succeed with EA.

We discussed the critical success factors that as the CIO or Chief Architect you can impact, and how these can drive planning and implementation for the organization to succeed. 

At the same time, we also acknowledged how--to be frank--not everything is in our control.

This was a class full of CIOs and Vice Presidents, and I gave an example and said you are all successful now in your jobs and careers, but raise your hand if you haven't been there--where you were on the outs and you boss or colleagues just didn't like you?

This was a class of about 20 people, and out of all these highly achieved folks, only one hand went up--a young kid--with only 3 or 4 years out of school, and still learning the ropes. 

Yes, this one person had not yet been on the losing end, but everyone else--all these successful people had been--ALL of them!

The point is not to say that success is just a chance event--it isn't! 

You have to work hard and try your best-- but no matter how much you think of yourself--it's even more important to remember that you don't control all the factors of your life that determine whether you succeed or fail.  

The same people that now had big, successful jobs, were the same people who had in a prior job or time been the person who could do no right at work. 

I tell myself to remember that there is personality, chemistry and fit at work; there is timing--and it is everything!--and there is how the stars are aligned. 

It helps a lot to be humble and learn, grow, work hard, never give up, have fun--and have faith in a mightier power above. 

From what I've seen, life is a cycle and today you may be down, but tomorrow you will be up (and the opposite is true too--so don't kick the person that is down and hurting). 

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heavens." (Ecclesiastes 3:1)--for everything and for everyone. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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April 25, 2013

Watch Out Below

This picture from this week in D.C. needs no commentary...except maybe, that's no good! 

"Over here, over here, I got it!" ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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Anyway You Spell It

Not to be mean or anything, but this was an eye-catching advertisement for this vendor's services. 

But whether or not you can spell what you are doing, if you are good at your job--what's the difference.

D.C. is a funny town: some people can spell and some can Repari watches. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 24, 2013

Drama In D.C.

Wanted to share two unrelated, but noteworthy items from my week so far...

First, this tree went down right in the middle of traffic in Washington, D.C. today. The BMW on the left was totaled, the van and taxi on the right had their respective front and rear-ends crushed. So much for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

On another note, I taught an enterprise architecture class earlier this week here, and in discussing establishing technical standards for the organization, one student put it well when he dramatically said "everyone loves standards, that's why they make their own."  :-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 21, 2013

What's Diplomacy Anyway?

This was a humorous engraved stone that I found in a gift shop today. 

It is a Concord "Words From The Wise," engraved paperweight, crafted in England. 

Diplomacy is generally associated with negotiation, persuasion, consideration, tactfulness, etiquette, and respect. However, this engraved paperweight has a little bit of a different view of it--"The art of letting someone have it your way."

Diplomacy has traditionally been differentiated from the use of military power in that diplomacy relies on "soft power" (co-opting or winning over cooperation), whereas the military employs "hard power" (coercion).  Both are ways of handling relations and resolving conflict.

More recently, some foreign affairs experts have started to use "smart power," which is situational-based--leveraging alliances and partnerships in some cases and a strong military in others. 

In any case, it's all about working together to bridge differences--and like the "Easy Button" the best way is to maintain a strong relationship, whether you get your way or not. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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Dastardly Bastards

I sit here this morning filled with indignation for the victims of a series of brutal monsters who have committed horrific acts against children (and adults). 

Last week we had the horrible terrorist attack at the Boston Marathon which left 3 dead (including an innocent 8-year old boy), almost two hundred wounded, and13 people who lost limbs (including leg amputations below the knee of a husband and wife recently married just last August ). 

Then yesterday, in the Wall Street Journal, two more news events about:

1) The raping of a 5-year old girl (YES, five) in India--4 months after the gang rape on the bus that left a young women tortured and dead.  This 5-year old was beaten and raped and found screaming for help and in pain with devices left inside her!  The suspect a 30-something man is left on the run. 

2) The trial of a late-term abortion doctor, Kermit Gosnell, charged among other things with murdering 7 infants who SURVIVED (initially) abortions he performed.  This doctor or staff is said to routinely "gouge the infant's neck with scissors to sever the spinal cord" (a method he called "snipping").  His offices were a horror lab with "blood on the floor," urine in the air, and "fetal remains haphazardly stored throughout the clinic--in bags, milk jugs, orange-juice cartons, and even in cat-food containers."  -- This is one sick person!!

While there are many people who are good, what loose nut or evil inclination drives others to terrible inhumane acts is a question that haunts us throughout the ages. 

I remember learning in Jewish day school that some people act worse than animals, because while a wild animal kills for food or to protect themselves, people kill and torture for the sake of it. 

Leon Kass in the article on Gosnell points out from his readings that "as science [and technology] advances, morals don't necessarily improve; [and moreover] that the opposite might well be the case" as people's faith in science above all else and belief in materialism as a cure of all ills replaces belief in G-d and the true mission of our souls in life. 

What punishment can these people get that will really fit their crimes--when the children are left snipped, beaten, raped, and dead? 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 20, 2013

Don't Stampede On Others' Feelings

I took this picture of a cow stampede when hiking in the mountains. 

The cows first came up to us all friendly and then after staying for a little bit, decided to bolt off across the open field.

Together--it was like a mini stampede. 

It reminded me of a situation recently, where I felt bad that I had stampeded (albeit inadvertently) on someone's feelings.

We received a delivery--actually a new couch (the other one we were replacing was really uncomfortable and it was high time to go). 

At one point, I was taken a little aback when the delivery man asked me, admiring it--"How much was it?"

Not wanting to really say specifically, I just said nonchalantly, "Oh, not so much."

But the man pressed on and said, "No really, how much was it?"

I was a little uncomfortable, but I figured he's just making conversation, and honestly it wasn't extravagant  so I say in a round figure what it was. 

Then I see his face go dark, and I realized what had accidentally happened.

It was perhaps a bit much for this nice man (although I really don't know his situation, but just his facial expression).

Anyway, I felt terrible and proceeded to say something light and then we chatted for a little bit. 

I think it is important to feel for all people--trying to make the best with what G-d provides and deal with everyday tests and challenges.

We are all people--and at any moment--what befalls one, can befall anyone, so we must be grateful for each and every blessing, for however long G-d grants it. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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Survivable Water Pipes

When an earthquake strikes, it is not just the immediate loss of life that is a concern, but the longer-term damage to critical infrastructure and the effect on human survival. 

As we know, water is critical to every living creature, and in an earthquake, when there is damage to the water infrastructure, such as the underground piping, people can be left without this basic life-sustaining commodity. 

When traditional solid cast-iron piping is used, an earthquake can cause these to deform and buckle. However, with a new ductile pipe design by Japanese company, Kubota--the pipes are built in a chain-like fashion and expand and contract, flex and bend, but do not easily break.  

According to the Wall Street Journal (14 April 2011), Kubota earthquake-resistant pipes even withstood the 9.0 quake in Japan in 2011, and it can withstand "shaking, landslides, and extreme temperatures. 

Now Los Angeles is piloting this pipe along 2 miles of its 7,000 miles of piping--they are focusing on "the most vulnerable, fault-line-adjacent areas," since the piping is 2 1/2 times the price of regular piping. 

In the absence of having a device like the Star Trek Replicator to synthesize food and water on the fly, it makes a lot of sense to upgrade our water systems and other critical infrastructure to protect us from the disasters that come. 

"Tea, Earl Grey, Hot" needs to be available not just in good times, but also in bad. ;-) 

(Source Photo: Kubota)
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April 19, 2013

Get Yourself An IT Management Agent

Management agents are not just for Hollywood stars anymore...

Bloomberg BusinessWeek (10 April 2013) says really good freelance application developers are now being represented by IT Management Agents.

One such agent company is called 10X and they represent more than 30 IT stars.

The management agent helps the developers find jobs, negotiate salary and terms, and handle the paperwork letting the IT guys do what they do best--which is code!

10X takes a 15% cut of their client's earnings, but some developers claim 2-3 times the salary they were earning before by using an agent--and rates are climbing to $300 an hour.

Some companies are using these premium talent coders until they can bring on a full hire or when they need some big guns for some special IT project. 

Perhaps with agent in tow (and even without), IT folks will start to shed their outdated nerdy image and instead take on some real Hollywood glamour--for the talent they really do bring to the organizational table. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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April 18, 2013

Rape-aXe Takes Hold

As a follow up to my blog on Tuesday about the Anti-rape Bra, a colleague gave me the lead to another prototype device called Rape-aXe.

Here is a YouTube video that explains how it works (explicit topic).

According to Nicci Talbot in Suite101, Rape-aXe is a female anti-rape condom that has small razor sharp barbs on the inside.

A rapist, who inserts into the female condom, gets trapped by the device, which needs to be surgically removed and leaves small scarring. 

The device was invented by Sonnet Ehlers a South Africa women, and it went into production in 2007 going for $2 a piece. 

According to the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) "1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime."

"It's a medieval device for a medieval deed," stated Ehlers, and no such evil deed should go unpunished. 

Females and males should be protected from sexual abuse both legally as well as with anti-rape devices--and that's the real point. ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution to haleybean91)
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April 16, 2013

World's Most Beautiful Elevator

The world's most beautiful elevator has got to be the AquaDom in the Radisson Blu Hotel in Berlin.

It contains a cylindrical elevator inside a 1 million liter fish tank filled with 1,500 fish of 50 species. 

If you can't get to the ocean, then bring the ocean to you--spectacular! ;-)

(Source Photo: here with attribution to Eric Pancer via Wikipedia)
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A Shocking Bra To Stop Attackers

In the medieval times, to help ensure fidelity of partners and protect against rape, they invented something called a chastity belt--I am sure you get it. 

There is one for women and there is another one fitted for men.

Now in light of the horrible rape attacks in India, 3 female students in India's SRM University have developed an anti-rape bra that literally shocks attackers. 

The bra is called "SHE" (for Society Harnessing Equipment) and unlike the chastity belt of the olden-days, this bra according to Popular Science delivers 3,800 kv to attackers. 

Women can activate the bra when they feel unsafe and it is pressure sensitive and is calibrated to be able to differentiate say a hug from something more violent. 

The woman is insulated from getting shocked by a polymer lining on the inside. 

The bra is also being outfitted so the pressure sensor sends a Bluetooth signal to your smartphone to send text message alerts to family or friends and the police with your GPS location. 

I want to end with a quote from one of the students as to their inspiration for this innovative anti-rape bra:

"Studying in a convent girls school, we were always taught to be good to everyone and bear a cheerful smile. After stepping into the real, cruel world, we realized that our smile could not last for long as the threat to our purity and integrity always lingered on...Hence, we have initiated the idea of self-defense, which protect the women from domestic, social and workplace harassment."

While I hope these students don't believe that everyone in the world is cruel, I applaud these young women for doing something positive to help protect women worldwide.  

I don't know how practical this anti-rape bra will end up being (i.e. wearing something that produces a dangerous shock), this is a good step in thinking about how to make women less of a target and increase the risk to any would-be attacker. ;-)

(Source Photo: adapted from here with attribution to Nicolas Sanguinetti) 


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April 14, 2013

Still In Love After 58 Years Together

My mom and dad are still in love after almost 58 years of marriage. 

While I already knew how special they were to each other--through thick and thin--when my mom took my dad's hand at the table, and said he has always been the love of her life, it was just beautiful. 

Their life has certainly not been easy--escaping from Nazi Germany as children, losing most of their education, and coming to this country with literally nothing. But they worked hard, worshipped G-d dutifully, gave charitably, and greatly valued their family and friendships above everything else in this world. 

They are good people and a wonderful role model to all of us, and we have always been like one extended family.

I'll always remember when my mom took his hand and said how much he meant to her--it was awesome! 

May God bless them both, always. ;-) 

(Source Photo: Rebecca Blumenthal)
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What Are You Staring At?

This deer and I had a staring contest this morning, and I lost.

The deer didn't let me get too close, before he ran off into the woods. 

A couple of other deer showed themselves and followed suit. 

Early in the morning, it was so quiet and peaceful on the way to grab a cup of coffee at 7-Eleven (their French Vanilla is a delicious favorite).

Thank you G-d for all the greatness that you bestow on us. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 13, 2013

Academic Assignments In Hate

According to the New York Times (12 April 2013) a high school English teacher in Albany, New York on Monday asked students to write a persuasive essay on why Jews are evil and the source of our problems. 

The assignment stated: "You do not have a choice in your position: you must argue that Jews are evil, and...convince me of your loyalty to the Third Reich!"

This assignment echoed a similar assignment given to students in Georgia and New York City earlier this year instructing students to calculate math problems by using number of slave whippings and killings. 

Yes, these school assignments--to our children--are shocking and appalling. 

Although they call these teachers giving these assignments, these are not real educators, but rather bigots given a classroom pulpit.

Marguerite Vanden Wyngaard, the school district superintendent, said: "Obviously, we have a severe lack of judgement and a horrible level of insensitivity."

But this "apology" does not go far enough--in fact, there is no apology--just excuses and calls for sensitivity training. 

Wyngaard should've called this behavior for what it is--discrimination, anti-Semitism, bigotry, and hatred, and announced the firing of the teacher--who shouldn't be teaching anyone, anything!

With the Holocaust Remembrance Day this past Monday, April 8--this teacher added insult to injury in making such an assignment.

While teaching students how to write persuasively and argue different points of view can mean that sometimes you have to argue "the other side"; it crosses the line to assign students to write about why a whole race of people are evil, and on top of it to force them all to take that position.

According to CNews, a third of the students stood up and refused to complete the assignment--thankfully, there are some good and decent people left in this world.

Excuses are not apologies. Sensitivity training is not removal of a hateful bigot. And this school superintendent should've had the ethical backbone and courage to join the students who stood against this wrong. 

These "teachers" and school superintendent have at least six million reasons to do better, much better.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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Colonize and Survive

It was interesting to read in Popular Science (12 April 2013) that the famous physicist and futurist, Stephen Hawking, stated that humans would face extinction on planet Earth within the next 1,000 years. 

Hawking says we need to colonize other planets--and I believe that is sound advice. 

While Mother Earth has an incredible ability to rejuvenate and self-heal, let's face it, the planet cannot sustain us forever in our current state.

According to the United Nations, the world population is expected to hit 9.22 billion by 2075, and life expectancy is expected to rise varying across countries from 66 to 97 by 2100.  

Moreover, according to research institution, Transatlantic Academy (May 2012), over the next 10-20 we are likely to see "accelerating demand for most natural resource commodities...increasingly volatile markets, [and] scarcities are likely to be more common." 

In the absence of major technological breakthroughs, increased social equity, and peaceful coexistence on this planet, we will need to find resources outside of Earth and colonize other planets--this is our future.  

Already, as reported by National Geographic (10 April 2013), the administration has funded NASA to capture an asteroid and set it in orbit around the moon  to not only study and develop capabilities to help protect our planet from a collision, but also to eventually be able to mine asteroids for precious minerals. 

As much as we love Earth--although sometimes we don't show it by being gluttonous with its resources, polluting, destroying the ozone, and generally not following sustainable practices--we need to have a "Plan B" whereby we explore for water, food, land, minerals, and energy elsewhere and be ready to make a move to survive another 6000 years and more. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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April 12, 2013

Tiptoeing Or Delivering A Knockout Punch

Russia (and many others countries) develop some really kick-a*s weapons--especially, when they are so simple, yet so devastatingly effective. 

Like this TOS-1A heavy flamethrower system--it is a multi-rocket launcher mounted on a T-72 main battle tank chassis. 

The TOS-1A carries 30 (newer version 24) 220-mm incendiary or thermobaric unguided rockets that it can shoot up to 3 km (newer version 6 km), and it destroys everything within 300 square meters using high-pressure and temperature.

What is cool is that the technology seems boiled down to the basics--shoot and eliminate. And when multiple TOS-1As roll unto the battlefield--they unleash what looks like a ruthless barrage of destructive fire. 

Of course, precision targeting weapons have the added benefit of mitigating civilian casualties--but from the looks of things, that is not what this weapon is all about.

The question is do you go half way or finish the job--do you hit below the belt or keep it a clean fight?

In war, if you leave the enemy intact or with fighting capabilities, then you may just have to fight them another day. 

While the rules of war protect people from the cruelties of all out hostilities, we need to make sure that in the end, it keeps them safe over the long-term, and does not just prolong the inevitable cat-fight.

Good, kind, and just people often don't feel comfortable delivering a knockout punch, but sometimes (not all the time) that is just what is needed to restore the peace.  ;-)


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April 10, 2013

Growing And Getting Old Together

The Wall Street Journal had a good book review on "The End of Sex" by Donna Freitas. 

The book is about the casual hook-up culture, where a sexual interaction is brief--like a single night--purely physical, and "no strings" attached--"you just do it, you're done, and you can forget about it."


Essentially it is a purely hedonistic, selfish act, for one's own pleasure--where the other person (if you even know their name) doesn't count. 


The review recounts studies that show that the percentage of undergraduates that have participated in hookups is as high as 65 to 75%!


People are searching a quick fix "without the constraints and sacrifices" that real committed relationships require. 


According to the review, hookups are not liberating and empowering, but denigrating and dehumanizing--where the other person is just a thing to use for self-pleasure.


It can certainly be understandable that college-aged students are driven to exploration and experimentation, and those unattached can be frustrated and alone and are looking for love. 


Whether hookup are the right way to find this--is an individual choice--however from my Jewish upbringing, I was raised to appreciate those who maintain modesty before marriage, because that way the bond of marriage is stronger for it. 


The book review seems to imply that hooking up for sex is perhaps just steps away from "sexual assault"--taking sex through violence --one way or another.  In a sense, the animal nature takes over and the spiritual element and higher connection is absent. Whether the means is consensual or forced, self-satisfaction is the end. 


While sex is a genuine human need, waking up to a stranger--no matter how attractive--is not a great substitute for sharing life's joys (and sorrows) with your true other half, because meaning means more than just the self and the moment. 


On one hand, if people can't find emotional love, then they can be left with the physical aspect of sex alone. On the other hand, even some in relationships may not be in the "right" relationships, and may be left searching for more. And still others may use sex to express their power over others--taking what they want, when they want, and how they want. 


At the most elementary level, people are motivated to pure self-satisfaction, yet as they rise up to higher orders of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, they are driven further to self-actualization


Seeing grandparents, parents and others grow a bond of giving and fidelity that is built up over decades is a truly beautiful thing--where love can deepen over time, rather than be forgotten the next morning. 


Meeting other people, dating, and developing relationships are markers on the road for those who are fortunate enough to find their true life partners--those with whom they can grow and get old together with. ;-)


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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April 9, 2013

Savor Every Moment


This is an awesome slow motion video from Gizmodo.

It is taken with a Phantom Flex4k camera at 1000 frames per second and high resolution 4096 x 2160.

This camera can capture "explosions, crashes, and other split-second events" in amazing detail and costs over $100,000, but in a sense it is a small price to pay for what the value of what you can get from it. 

When I watched this video of the firefighters going into action, I felt as if I was really there experiencing the true heat of the fire, the thick smell of the smoke, the fear of what lay in the dark and burning building, and the human determination for everyone working together to put it out and save lives. 

This made me think about how in rushing around all the time to do everything that others expect of us and that we expect of ourselves that we often aren't fully in touch with the moment. 

It's more like we are just trying to get through it while everything is passing us by, and we are in a disconnected fugue state.

I imagine that at the end of life, we look back at the many moments that we don't fully remember, experienced in just a cold and hurried manner, and that we never got to really feel or savor

If only we had been in the moment, maybe we would have listened to others better, been more empathetic, less judging and critical, and said and done the right things more often. 

Being in the moment would enable us to more fully experience it, remember it, learn from it, grow with it, be together in it--and really be alive (and not a bunch of Walking Dead zombies half the time)!

This video is an eye-opener and wake up call to slow down, experience, and feel life, rather than have it just pass us so quickly and shallowly by. ;-)


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April 7, 2013

Rock Climbing With Rebecca

So we took my daughter, Rebecca, and a friend indoor rock climbing and it was awesome!

Each of them climbed three walls of increasing difficulty. 

They ended with a 5.7 grade climb and did it more or less with ease. 

We were yelling "Go Rebecca!" the whole time. 

The guy who holds the rope, the belayer, told me its not so much about strength as it is willpower--and that is a terrific lesson not just for kids, but for all of us!

I was really impressed not only with how they climbed so energetically and with such determination, but how much fun they were able to have doing it. 

I told my daughter that next time--I hope to climb with her--that'll be interesting (oh G-d help me...).

I took a picture here of the place on the wall for the 5.10 climb, and it was funny for two reasons, it has this crazy looking skull on the wall, and someone taped underneath a note that said "Brush Your Teeth." ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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The Great Big Apple Donut

Some people think the new Apple HQs (or Apple Campus 2) looks like a flying saucer or spaceship--but to me, it looks like a great big donut. :-)

In all seriousness though, the planned Apple HQs is so cool--I love it!

Bloomberg BusinessWeek (4 April 2013) has a terrific article about this awesome design project. 

Some of the facts about this planned facility:

- Houses 12,000 employees
- Has 4 concentric rings.
- 2.8 million square feet (2/3 the size of the Pentagon)
- 176 acres of trees, including the vast courtyard in the center which will have apricot, olive, and apple orchards. 
- 40-foot high walls of concave glass
- 700,000 square feet of solar panels (enough to power 4,000 homes)
- Climate-responsive technology such as window treatments that automatically open and close
- Costs about $5 billion (1.1 billion more than the new World Trade Center)
- Move in expected 2016
- Just 2 entry roads
- 4-story underground garage
- 2 R&D labs
- Fitness center

While some think that this building is vanity, I think it is a work of art, and perfectly suits the innovativeness nature of the company.

Apple's HQS is a reflection of itself, not just another building. The beautiful, sleek, and high-tech building melds with the company's design philosophy and vision for great consumer products.

Just like Apple's unique positioning in being able to integrate hardware and software solutions for their customers, their new HQS is a unification of their physical work environment with their internal vision for themselves as a company and the amazing products they put out. 

Unlike some organizations which are foolishly tearing down all their walls and working as if they in sitting in Starbucks, Apple understands how to marry the need for a social and collaborative work environment with a proper and respectful functional space. 

Apple's building will be beautiful and functional just like their computing devices...and they remain true to themselves and us. ;-)

(Source Photo: here with Attribution to Cupertino Government)
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April 6, 2013

Go Simple!

Two interesting recent articles discuss the importance of building in simplicity to product design to make things more useful to people.

Contrary to popular belief, simple is not easy. Mat Mohan in Wired Magazine (Feb. 2013) says that "simplicity is about subtraction," and "subtraction is the hardest math in product design."

Two of the best recent examples of simplicity through subtraction is what Apple was able to achieve with the iPod, iPhone, iPad, and iTunes, and what Google did through its "sparse search page."

Unfortunately, too many companies think that "quality is associated with more," instead of less, and so they pack on options, menus, and buttons until their darn devices are virtually useless. 

Similarly, an article in the Wall Street Journal (29 March 2013) advocates that "simplicity is the solution," and rails against the delays, frustration, and confusion caused by complexity. 

How many gadgets can't we use, how many instructions can't we follow, and how many forms can't we decipher--because of complexity?

The WSJ gives examples of 800,000 apps in the Apple store, 240+ choices on the menu for the Cheesecake Factory (I'd like to try each and every one), and 135 mascaras, 437 lotions, and 1,992 fragrances at the Sephora website.

With all this complexity, it's no wonder then that so many people suffer from migraines and other ailments these days. 

I remember my father telling me that you should never give consumers too many choices, because people just won't know what to choose.  Instead, if you simply give them a few good choices, then you'll make the sale.

Unfortunately, too many technologists and engineers develop ridiculously complex products, and too many lawyers, legislators, and regulators insist on and prepare long and complex documents that people aren't able to read and cannot readily understand. 

For example, in 2010, the tax code was almost 72,000 pages long, the 2010 Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare) is about 2,700 pages, and the typical credit card contract now runs to 20,000 words.  

Even the brightest among us, and those with a lot of time on their hands, would be challenged to keep up with this. 

While rewriting and tax code is a welcome topic of discussion these days, it befuddles the mind why most of the time, we simply add on new laws, rules, regulations, amendments, and exclusions, rather than just fix it--plain and simple. 

But that's sort of the point, it's easier for organizations to just throw more stuff out there and put the onus on the end-users to figure it out--so what is it then that we pay these people for? 

The plain language movement has gotten traction in recent years to try and improve communications and make things simpler and easier to understand. 

Using Apple as an example again (yes, when it comes to design--they are that good), it is amazing how their products do not even come with operating instructions--unlike the big confusing manuals in minuscule print and numerous languages that used to accompany most electronic products.  And that's the point with Apple--you don't need instructions--the products are so simple and intuitive--just the way they are supposed to be, thank you Apple!

The journal offers three ways to make products simpler: 

- Empathy--have a genuine feel for other people's needs and expectations.

- Distill--reduce products to their essence, getting rid of the unneeded bells and whistles. 

- Clarify--make things easier to understand and use.

These are really the foundations for User-Centric Enterprise Architecture, which seeks to create useful and usable planning products and governance services--the point is to provide a simple and clear roadmap for the organization, not a Rorschach test for guessing the plan, model, and picture du-jour. 

Keeping it simple is hard work--because you just can't throw crap out there and expect people to make sense of it--but rather you have to roll up your sleeves and provide something that actually makes sense, is easy to use, and makes people's lives better and not a living product-design hell. ;-)

(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)
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April 5, 2013

Don't Underestimate The Stress of Change

Regularly in IT, we field new technologies and systems.

Often, we don't pay enough attention to the details of change management and what that means to our users. 

A great article in Government Executive Magazine by Dr. Victoria Grady really hits this right on. 

Grady points out something that is often overlooked: people have an instinctual predisposition to attach to/lean on objects and intangibles--including things like office spaces, systems, business processes, organizational structures, leaderships styles, and so on. 

If you take that away--excuse the simile, but it is like taking candy away from a baby--you are going to get a lot of (often understandable) whining, crying, and resistance.

The key is understand that people in a sense really all have a kid inside them, and they need to be listened to, understood, empathized with, and cared for. 

Changing out IT systems, restructuring the office, or doing a reorganization (as much as they may be needed) can cause people huge amounts of stress and the organization productivity losses, if not done right. 

Remember, you are changing up people's status quo, what they know, their security blanket, and you need to be mindful of and implement a robust communication and change management strategy. 

What I have found is that one thing that raises the stress tempo is when people don't have enough information on the change that is coming, how that impacts them, and how "everything will be okay."

The more unknowns, the more stress. 

While you cannot share information you don't yet have or perhaps that is not yet baked, you can be honest and tell people what you do know, what you are still investigating, perhaps what some of the options are, timeframes, and of course, solicit their input. 

To the extent that people are kept in the loop and can influence the process--the more control they have--the better they can cope and adjust. 

Not that adults are children, but the analogy still holds, when you take away a bottle from a infant, you better have a pacifier to keep them happy--in this case, the pacifier is the replacement thing that people need to attach to/lean on to feel secure in their jobs. 

If you are changing out systems, make sure the new system is well vetted, tested, and trained with the end-users, so they know and feel comfortable with the change--and they have the confidence in you and your team, the new system, and in themselves to handle it. 

Same goes for other changes in the organization--you can mitigate stress through communication, collaboration, testing, training, and other confidence building measures. 

Adults and babies are a lot happier and better able to deal with change, when they are taken care of properly.

We are all somewhat change adverse and that is a basic survival instinct, so we sometimes need to take baby steps, walk before we run, and work together to change as a group and ensure that the "new" is indeed better than the "old."  ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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April 4, 2013

Difficult Employees x 7

So I was learning about some management best practices in terms of there being 7 major types of difficult employees:
  1. Challengers--employees that are oppositional; they resent authority, are disrespectful and confrontational. 
  2. Clingers--people who are overly dependent; they are uncertain about what to do, fearful of making a mistake, withhold their opinions and may harbor deep resentments.
  3. Drama Queens/Kings--these folks crave attention; they can be found spreading gossip and rumors and making dramatic pronouncements both professional and personal.
  4. Loners--people who like to be left alone; they tend to hover over their computers and avoid personal interactions. 
  5. Power Grabbers--staff that tend to get into power struggles with their boss; they ignore instructions and resist direction. 
  6. Slackers--those who don't do the work they are supposed to do; they tend to linger on break, calls, or the Internet or be out of the office altogether.
  7. Space Cadets--employees whose minds and discussion always seem to be in la-la-land; they tend to be off topic and impractical. 
Obviously, each presents a unique set of management challenges, but one of the most important things a manager can do is focus on specific behaviors and the impact of those on the quality/quantity of work and on the organization, and work with the employee whether through coaching, counseling, mentoring, or training on how to improve their performance. 

It should never be about the manager and the employee, but rather about the results and the outcomes. Keep it objective, be empathetic, document the issues, and work in earnest with the person to improve (where possible). 

Difficult employees are not evil characters (or villains) like in the James Bond movies, but rather humans being that need inspiration, collaboration, guidance, feedback, and occasionally when appropriate, a change in venue--where a square peg can fit in a square hole. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 2, 2013

Decision-Making WIth Perspective, Please.

An article in Fast Company (1 April 2013) by Chip and Dan Heath tells us to use the 10/10/10 rule for making tough decisions.

That is to consider how you will feel about the decision in 10 minutes, in 10 months, and in 10 years--in order to "get some distance on our decisions."

But this doesn't make a lot of sense to me, if you are making a decision, looking at it with 3 future lenses does not provide a lot of additional insight even if they are at various points in the future. 

What makes a lot more sense is to examine the decision based on past, present, and future consideration. 

Past--At home, I learned from my father that when he makes a big decision, he thinks about what his father would've have done in a similar situation. My dad greatly respected his father, and believes that he is a guiding force in his everyday life. It is important to consider what our parents, grandparents, and other people that we respect from our past would do in similar circumstances--this is a social view. For example, would your parents and grandparents be proud of your decision and what it represents for you as a person or would you feel ashamed and guilty, if they found out. This is not to say that you can't express your individuality, but rather that your past is one important guidepost to consider.

Present--In operational law enforcement and defense environment, I learned that you have to respect the decision-maker at the frontline. The details of what is happening or the ground in the here and now can certainly be a decisive factor in both split second decisions, but also those decisions where we have some luxury of contemplation--this is an operational view. Additionally, in making a big decision, we need to be true to ourselves and base the decision on our values and beliefs (i.e. who we are). In contrast, when we make decisions that violate our core beliefs, we usually regret it pretty quickly. 

Future--In Yeshiva, I learned to strongly consider the future in all decision-making. The notion that this world is just a corridor to the future world was a frequent theme. From this religious perspective, what is important in how we live our lives today is not the immediate pleasure we can get, but rather what the future consequences will be on our spirit/soul (i.e. Neshama)--this is a strategic view. One teacher exhorted us to always look at things from the future perspective of our death bed--will you feel you lived your life as a good person and in a fulfilling way or did you just do what felt good or was selfish and fleeting? For example, he said, "No one ever looked back and wish they spent more time working. Instead, they usually regret not spending more time with the family and true friends."

Decision-making is not trivial--you need to consider carefully what you do, with whom, when and how. To do this, looking at 3 points in the future is minimally helpful. Instead, consider your past, present, and future, and you will make better decisions that will enable you to be true to yourself, your family and community, and your very soul. 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
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April 1, 2013

When The Solution Is Worse Than The Problem

Not to be crude, but we had some clogged plumbing over the weekend.

We tried everything to get it working again--plunger, snake, and even some septic tank treatment.

Nothing seemed to work, so at one point, my wife looked up on the Internet what to do, and it said to unwind a hanger and try that.

Well this turned out to be a huge mistake and I must've gotten too close to the chemical fumes--my eyes were burning. 

I ended up in the ER with my eyes being flushed for close to 2 hours. 

Afterwards, being very supportive and sitting with me in the hospital with my eyeballs hooked to suction cups and saline solution, my wife says to me, "This is a case when the solution (i.e. the results of our trying to fix the plumbing ourselves) is worse then the problem (the clog)."

I thought to myself boy was she right, and while it is good to be self-sufficient and try to fix and improve things ourselves, it is also good to know when to leave it to the experts. 

How many times do we foolishly try to do something where "we are out of our league," and actually can end up doing more harm then good. 

In this case, I could have seriously damaged my eyes--permanently--and am so grateful to G-d that everything turned out okay. 

Knowing our limits and accurately assessing risks can help us to know when to proceed ourselves and when to ask for some expert assistance. 

It's good do things for yourself and to try your best, but also value and know when to leverage other people's strengths.

With my eyes irritated and burning and being flushed out for what seemed like an eternity, I had some serious time to ponder what can happen when things go wrong.

Years ago, I learned to "Hope (and pray) for the best, but prepare for the worst," and I want to continue to work and improve on both these. ;-)

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)


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